


Be Careful What You Wish For

by cls2256



Series: Sirius Black's Happy Ending [2]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Book 5: Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix, Eventual Smut, F/M, Family Dynamics, Leaky Cauldron, Love, Order of the Phoenix (Harry Potter), POV Sirius Black, Pining, Post-Sirius Black in Azkaban, Rise of Voldemort, Sad Sirius Black, Second War with Voldemort, Shyness, Slow Burn, Smut, The Ministry of Magic (Harry Potter) is Terrible
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-13
Updated: 2019-03-14
Packaged: 2019-09-17 20:25:36
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 17
Words: 62,497
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16981230
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cls2256/pseuds/cls2256
Summary: Voldemort has returned and the Order of the Phoenix is reinstated. Struggling with the fact that his godson has returned to school, and he traded one prison for another, Sirius Black dreams of a normal life. A life with freedom, happiness, and a family of his own- all of which seem impossible as a wanted fugitive.When he seeks out an old friend and convinces her to join the resistance, he eventually learns the counter to the age old phrase,be careful what you wish for; because despite all odds being against him, he might just get it.





	1. 1

**Author's Note:**

> This fic takes place during the Order of the Phoenix book timeline, shortly after Harry and the other teens return to Hogwarts. From where we last left Sirius contemplating his escape to the first chapter of this fic, everything happened as it did in the canon storyline.
> 
> the title and theme of this installment of Sirius Black's Happy Ending is based off the phrase **Be careful what you wish for, because you might just get it**
> 
> I hope you all enjoy!!

This house smelled like mildew, stale parchment, and despair. It was a smell he didn’t remember his old home having, but in its vacancy, it acquired an odor that not even ‘queen of clean’ Molly Weasley herself could rid. Weeks of scrubbing and cleaning did nothing to really spruce up the place; it was still filled with dank misery of his angsty youth and unhappy memories. There was much in his life that he was uncertain of, but one detail he could confirm without a doubt was that he hated this place. He never imagined he’d ever return to this godforsaken shithole— his smelly, dusty, miserable _shithole._

Sirius Black sat alone in the drawing room of 12 Grimmauld Place with a half-drank bottle of firewhisky. He stared at the charred, black hole that once depicted his face on the Black family tapestry. The burnt spot served as a reminder as to how much he hated the family he was born into, hated how quickly his mother would blast someone off the family tree when they would cross the ‘sacred’ House of Black pure-blood values. He was a prisoner here; he traded his dank, concrete 9x9 cell for this dusty, creaky house— complete with a prejudice and completely mental house elf.

Had he been able to snag that traitor Pettigrew, things would be different. He would’ve made that rat talk— to tell the world how it was indeed his sniveling, pathetic piece of shit self that betrayed James and Lily. To tell the world that it was Pettigrew that had cut off his own finger, before blowing apart that street of muggles on Halloween night, 1981. He would’ve made that filthy rodent pay— for the years he spent in Azkaban, for the years his godson spent without a family that loved him. Alas, Sirius had failed. That fat, conniving little twit he once called a friend had gotten the best of him. 

The world still thought him a murderer; still thought him a traitor. He was still considered at large, had a reputation that he served the Dark Lord and was doing his bidding while evading recapture. He chuckled through a swig of firewhisky at that thought; he doing Voldemort’s bidding? Hysterical. Completely mental. He would _die_ before he ever sided with him.

The house was quiet with all the kids back in school. The quiet hit him hard, like a bludger hitting him square in the gut. He secretly had been dreading September 1st since the day his godson came to stay under his roof; selfishly knowing he would’ve been thrilled had the Ministry ruled his expulsion for defending himself against rogue dementors. Maybe this made him a terrible person, to wish that a 15 year old boy would not be allowed back at school so his washed up, ex-con godfather wouldn’t have to be alone in this shithole of a house. Oh, the fun they could’ve had here, the memories they could’ve made— they could’ve been a family, just him and Harry, as it should’ve been after that terrible, fateful night. It’s what James and Lily would’ve wanted.

The what-ifs of his life were driving him slowly into madness, the comfort of strong firewhisky staving off a mental breakdown. He was now a 35 year old man; at this age, he should be accomplished in a career, have a wife, maybe a couple kids running about. He should be the head of his household, enjoying things like family birthday parties, taking promotions at work and making a better reputation for the surname Black. Instead of these things, he was left with a burnt up tapestry and a nutter house elf, locked inside the oppressive walls of his youth, drinking until his liver shut down.

“Sirius, may I come in?”

Remus Lupin’s head emerged through a crack in the door, looking to him in earnest. Sirius did not respond, but Remus took his silence as permission to enter, stepping into the drawing room and shutting the door behind him.

“You’ve hardly left this room in days”

Remus looked concerned. He shifted on his heels as he shoved his hands in the pockets of his trousers.

“Well, it’s not like there’s much else to do.” Sirius grumbled.

His voice was deep and gravelly from the copious amount of firewhisky he’d had this evening. He avoided his friend’s intrusive stare, knowing the other members of the Order had sent Remus in for an intervention.

“I know you would’ve liked Harry to have stayed here with you, but you have to understand that he needed to go back to Hogwarts. He needs to get his education”

Sirius rolled his eyes, nodding and pouring himself a shot of the honey colored liquid. He downed the liquor in one gulp, shaking his head furiously and smacking his tongue as the liquid burned down his throat.

“I’m a waste; I can’t leave this damn house, I can’t do anything useful for the Order” he growled “I traded one prison for another”

Remus sighed, giving him a sympathetic frown “You know we are going to get your name cleared as soon as we can. We hate that you are stuck in here too, but it’s for your safety. You got out of Azkaban once, but I seriously doubt you can do it again.”

Sirius exhaled heavily, rubbing his unshaven beard that was beginning to itch his skin. “I just wanted us to be a family— James and Lily would’ve wanted us to be a family.”

“You two are a family” Remus insisted “Even if he is at school. Just because he is not physically with you every day doesn’t mean he isn’t still your godson.”

“I’ve wished of having a family” Sirius said, his words slurring slightly. He typically wouldn’t open himself up this deep to anyone, but the alcohol coursing through his system made him feel braver than he typically would’ve been. “Not of this piece of shit family on this wall—“ he gestured to the Black family tree tapestry that encircled the room “My own family; a wife, some kids— what James and Lily were just starting to build. I wish for that more than anything.”

“Be careful what you wish for, Padfoot” Remus said with a slight chuckle “What you describe requires responsibility— Responsibility was never your strong suit”

“We’re old men now” Sirius snickered, a smile now creeping across his face “Isn’t there some rule that once you’re our age, responsibility and wisdom smacks us in the face?”

“You watch who you’re calling an old man” Remus jeered. 

The men laughed, their chuckles settling into a moment of silence. 

“Molly left some beef stew for you in case you got hungry— why don’t you come out and eat? Sitting in here staring at this tapestry won’t do you any good.”

Sirius sighed heavily as he poured another shot, downing it in a quick gulp. “Maybe after bit”

Remus sighed, nodding stiffly, accepting defeat. He rose, slinking to the drawing room door and exiting, but not before turning back to look at Sirius once more time. Sirius didn’t return his friend’s stare; he wanted to be left alone with his thoughts and firewhisky. The door closed behind Remus, his footsteps growing fainter as the werewolf retreated farther from the drawing room. Another shot of firewhisky went down the hatch, the silence of 12 Grimmauld Place once again hitting him hard.

* * *

The room spun as he flopped down onto his bed, his stomach churning from lack of a sufficient meal before drinking. This was his existence; wake up, hear about everyone else’s lives and how helpful they were for Dumbledore and the Order, drink, go to sleep— and he was downright bitter about it.

He closed his eyes, images of wild curly hair sweeping through his mind’s eye. He could still hear her soft, shy giggle, and picture her unbelievably cute expression whenever she would flush with embarrassment. It had been two years since Allie was ripped away from his cell, and he thought of her often. Hell, it had been her idea to starve himself thin enough to slip through his cell bars, then doggie paddle through the North Sea to the mainland— to _freedom_. Or so he had thought at that moment. if only he would’ve been able to catch the rat he was hunting— then he truly would be free. The freedom he sought was just out of reach when he couldn’t even leave his damn house. 

Surely Allie Murphy would be out of Azkaban by now, only having been sentenced to 6 months to start. He wondered what happened to her once reassigned to a woman’s cell; did she get along with her cell mate? Did she have an easier time adjusting since the idea of being in prison had already sunk in? Or was it the worst 5 months of her life, where she spent if crying and shivering on her bunk, unable to warm herself without someone to share a bed with?

He wondered how she was doing now, adjusting to life on the outside. Surely she wasn’t a prisoner in her own home as Sirius was, but was she happy? Was her family fed and taken care of? Many what-if situations had run through his head over the past two years, he had thought of her many nights before falling asleep. His promise to find her to say hello if he ever got out of Azkaban was still in the back of his mind. 

He climbed out of bed and thrust open his top drawer of his dresser, reaching to the back and pulling out a folded piece of parchment he had tucked away for safe keeping. He collapsed back onto the bed, staring at the combination of words and letters he had scrawled a few months ago. The letters and numbers formed an address; her address. He had done some research in the many months he spent huddled with Buckbeak in a cave near Hogsmeade, finally finding a registrar for wizard families that had the Murphy’s listed— thankful there was only one Allison Murphy listed amongst the 78 wizards in the country that shared her last name. He had held onto this information without action, for he had curated many excuses for not having visited his old friend yet. First, before he had her address, he had to focus all his energy on capturing Pettigrew. Then, he was on the run, too dangerous to return to England. Then, he needed to focus on Harry, and him getting through the tri-wizard tournament. Now, he couldn’t leave his house, in fear that he would be spotted and recognized. 

He lay and stared at the spinning ceiling, fidgeting with the paper in his hands; he was going mad in this house. He needed to get out. It had been two weeks since he and the Order escorted the kids to Kings Cross, two weeks since he got some real fresh air and sunlight. Two weeks since Lucius Malfoy had recognized him in his Animagus form, sealing his fate of house arrest. He looked down at the scrawled note, guilt striking him as he remembered brushing her wild, soft curls, promising he would come say hello. Surely she knew he was out, it had been plastered all over the wizarding world since fat ass Wilson had found him missing from his cell when he returned to work the morning after he escaped.

Urgency struck him, he wanted to make good on his promise. He needed to make good on his promise. He had always been a man of his word, and at this point, he had shot the word he gave her to hell. He was many things, but a liar he was not. 

He sat up, the feeling of lightheadedness from his abrupt shift to upright stopping him in his tracks. He couldn’t go find her tonight, not like this. He hadn’t showered in days; he was unshaven, drunk, and raggedy. He needed to clean himself up, look presentable if he was going to meet with her after all this time. He lay back down; deciding tomorrow would be the day. He would eat a decent meal; have a shower and shave, and sneak out under the cover of nightfall to reunite with his old cell mate. Just to say hello.

* * *

“You look nice, Sirius”

Molly Weasley smiled politely, but her tone was stiff and forced. She and Sirius had butted heads for months, mostly over decisions regarding Harry. He had to force civility between the two of them— it’s not that he thought ill of Molly, he respected her— he really did. He just also thought she was bossy and unreasonable. Especially when telling him how to handle his godson.

“Thank you, Molly” he replied politely.

A glass of water sat 11:00 in relation to his plate of roast chicken and vegetables, instead of his usual firewhisky, wine or meade. His shoulder length dark hair has been brushed, his facial hair shaved and trimmed neatly. He was ready for his trip he was taking in secret tonight, his eyes constantly darting to the clock, counting the hours until sundown.

“It’s nice to see you out of the drawing room” Remus said between bites “and eating an actual meal” 

“Moony, you don’t have to act like my mother” Sirius laughed

“If you didn’t act like an unruly teenager, he wouldn’t have to be your mother” Molly muttered under her breath

“What was that?” Sirius snapped

He had heard what Molly had passive-aggressively mumbled, but he wanted her to say it loud and clear, so he could tell her to shove her words right back up her...

“Sirius, Molly, let’s not fight” Remus cut in “this chicken is wonderful, by the way”

“Thank you, Remus” Molly beamed, going along with Remus’s change of subject. “The trick is in the seasoning...”

Sirius tuned out most of the rest of the dinner conversations, loading up on protein and carbs for his little trip. His plan was to travel across town camouflaged in darkness, taking advantage of his Animagus talents to go hopefully unnoticed, and reveal his true self to Allie when she was alone. 

What was he hoping from this reunion with his old cell mate? To catch up on their lives over the past few years, only to fall into a routine of sending an obligatory Christmas card via owl once a year? Or to shag each other’s brains out, relishing in getting to pleasure a woman for the first time since they shared a cell? As much as he would enjoy the latter, he would be ok if they didn’t shag, but he felt now was the right time to find her. 

“Sirius, you’re awful quiet tonight” Tonks said, breaking his concentration “you feeling alright?”

“Oh, yeah” he said quickly “just a little hung over”

He gave Tonks a forced smile, ignoring the disapproving frown on Molly’s face. He took a large gulp of his water, slamming the glass down a little more forceful than necessary.

“Well,” he said, clasping his hands together “That was delicious— what’s for dessert?”

* * *

His hand was on the doorknob, he was almost out of this shithole scot-free until a deep whisper cut through the silence.

“Lumos”

Remus’s face was now illuminated by his wand tip, staring at Sirius frozen with his hand on the doorknob. He was dressed in striped cotton pajamas that reminded Sirius of Azkaban’s uniforms. His graying hair was disheveled from sleep, and his eyes bloodshot and sunken./p>

“Evening Moony” Sirius grubbed, fighting hard to maintain a casual appearance.

“Going somewhere?” Remus asked, raising a brow

Sirius ran a hand through his hair, shrugging “Maybe”

Remus shook his head disapprovingly “Padfoot—“

“Relax! I’m going to be fine”

“You’re sneaking out to go find that girl, aren’t you? The one from Azkaban”

Sirius’s brow rose “so what if I am?”

“Are you barking mad?” Remus sputtered “Lucius Malfoy recognized you at the train station- there’s no telling who may see you out and about and report to the Ministry. Dumbledore said—“

“Fuck what Dumbledore said! “ Sirius spat “I am a goddamn prisoner in this house and I need to get some air and stretch my legs. I’ll be back in a day or so”

“Padfoot, wait!”

Sirius did not wait; he turned the doorknob and exited the house, breathing in the cool, crisp fall air. With a leap he transformed into the shaggy black dog, and took off running, eager to reunite with his old friend. Just to say hello.


	2. 2

Apparating would’ve saved a ton of time on foot, but boy, was the fresh air _amazing_. Sirius enjoyed the journey through the night and into the next day; it was the first time he felt free in months. It was mid-afternoon by the time he reached a small brick house, situated on a couple acres of grassy field. The house seemed quiet, peaceful— and rather small for a family of her size to live in. He trotted around the house, panting and wagging his tail once he saw a glimpse of red curly hair through the window.

Around the back of the house was a waif of a blonde girl, not much older than a teen, hanging laundry from the clothesline. Sirius sat down a few paces away, studying the girl. Was this Allie’s squib sister? The one she had told her she struggled to hold a job? The girl took a few moments to notice him watching her; when she did, her face lit up with a wide, obnoxious smile.

“Well hi there, poochie!” she cried excitedly “come here, boy!”

_Ah, fuck._ Her voice was annoying. She was one of those ‘overexcited to see a dog’ girls who would squeal and nearly pull his fur out while she petted him. He remained seated in his spot, not eager to approach.

“Come here boy!!” she beckoned “Hey, Allie— ALLIE!”

There she was— the sunlight caught that gorgeous wild red hair, highlights sparkling almost golden in the sunlight. Her porcelain, freckled face was just as beautiful as he remembered, her smile warming him to the very core.

“Where did that dog come from?” She asked, looking to Sirius curiously.

Her sister shrugged “I don’t know, I turned around and he was sitting there”

Allie smiled pleasantly at him, patting her thigh “Won’t you come here?”

Her voice was as sweet as he remembered, and certainly not shrill and obnoxious like her sister’s was. Sirius wagged his tail, trotting over to them happily. Allie petted his head gently, with the light touch he remembered she having. Her sister, on the other hand, confirmed that she was indeed one of those annoying, overexcited girls, nearly pulling his fur out with her aggressive strokes.

“You are just so cute, aren’t you?— yes, aren’t you, yes you know you’re cute…”

_Maybe if I bite her hand off, she wouldn’t think I was so cute…_

“Shannon, maybe get him some water?” Allie suggested “He doesn’t have a collar, he must be a stray…”

“Alright, should we feed him too?”

Allie gave him a small smile. “You hungry?” she asked sweetly.

_YES._

He gave a small, soft bark and wagged his tail. He was indeed hungry; his journey on foot had been longer than anticipated, working up a serious appetite. 

“I’ll take that as a yes, we can give him the left over beef stew Mum made last night”

The girls fed him the entire container of stew. It was delicious— potentially because Sirius hadn’t eaten anything in 18 hours, but hell, he didn’t care. In that moment the beef stew was the best damned thing he’d eaten in his entire life. 

He was wishing the blonde called Shannon was not here; not only because if Allie were alone he could’ve revealed his true self and ate his stew like a gentleman, but also because her voice was just so damned annoying. It was no wonder Allie was so quiet, how could she get a word in edge-wise when Shannon never shut the fuck up? He had deduced that she was indeed the squib sister he was told about, for she rolled her eyes every time Allie performed simple spells in front of her.

“Girls! I’m home!”

At first glance, Sirius could’ve sworn it was Molly Weasley bustling in the front door of the small house. Allie’s mother was a plump, red haired woman similar in height to Molly, but far more freckled. Grocery sacks levitated next to her, settling themselves on the dining room table with a wave of her wand.

“Hi Mum” Allie said sweetly “How was work?”

“Oh, fine, just a quiet day at the Cauldron” 

Her Irish accent was thicker than Allie’s was; he realized she must’ve been talking about the Leaky Cauldron, remembering Allie telling him her mum used to clean rooms there. The Murphy matriarch frowned as she noticed Sirius, looking between Allie and Shannon disapprovingly.

“Why is there a dog in my kitchen?”

“He just came wandering up!” Shannon cried “ain’t he cute, Mum?”

She narrowed her eyes “Is he a stray?”

“We think so; he didn’t have a collar” Allie replied softly “we fed him the beef stew from yesterday”

“ _All_ of it?” their mother asked incredulously “Food doesn’t grow on trees, Allison.”

“Technically…” Shannon interjected “some food _does_ grow on trees…”

“ _Fine_ ” Their mother gave Shannon a stern look, shutting her up immediately. “Money doesn’t though, and money buys food—“ she sighed heavily as she looked Sirius up and down “did you at least check him for fleas?”

“Yes, he seems clean for a stray…” Allie said her voice even softer.

She looked between Allie, Shannon and Sirius a few times before her expression softened— albeit ever so slightly “Alright, but if he messes in the house— _even once_ — I want him out”

Sirius turned his snout up at the woman, how dare she think he was an uncivilized dog to urinate so indecently? If only she knew…

“I invited Jack over for dinner, by the way”

Allie flushed a deep shade of scarlet, opening her mouth to speak. No sound came out, and a look of panic washed over her expression. Shannon gave Allie a sly smile, leaning back against the kitchen cabinets and flashing her eyes.

“Ooh, Jack’s coming over??” 

_Jack._ That is a man’s name. Who the hell was Jack? Was Jack a bloke she liked? Was he her boyfriend? Sirius decided he didn’t like him. He didn’t know the fella, (who was probably a nice guy) but he didn’t like him. _Jack._ What a name. He was probably a cocky wanker who needed his face beat in.

“Why did you ask him?…” Allie whispered, her voice trailing off

“Because he is a sweet boy who is sweet on you” her mother replied “You like him, don’t you?”

“Well— uhm, yes…”

“Then you need to get to know him better. He asks about you a lot, but you know you barely say two words to anybody…”

Allie blushed even more, shifting uncomfortably on her heels and freezing up again.

“You are 25 years old; it’s time for you to start dating. Put yourself out there— find someone who will love you and take care of you” her mother sighed, stepping over to her and tucking a lock of her curls behind her ear. “You had to grow up so fast, and you have been a godsend to me since your father left. You have no idea how thankful I am to have you as my eldest daughter”

“Allie always was the favorite…” Shannon sneered, plopping down at the kitchen table

“I love you all equally” their mother corrected her “But Allison made sacrifices for this family that I am forever indebted to.” She turned back to Allie “Things are better now; easier. You deserve to find a husband and start a family of your own, sweetheart.

Allie bit her lip, remaining quiet as she shifted her weight once more. After a moment “He is rather handsome, isn’t he…”

Sirius let out a sigh as he lay down on the kitchen floor. _What did you expect? It’s been two years; of course she would find another bloke handsome at some point._

“He is, and he is a nice man that comes from a nice family— why don’t you get cleaned up? Put on a fresh blouse”

Allie nodded, smiling awkwardly as she began to pick her fingernails.

“When are you going to set me up with a nice bloke, mum?” Shannon interjected “I’m 19 now, you know”

“Maybe when you start being nicer to everyone around you, a nice bloke would come your way” their mother quipped back “Go, Allison, get cleaned up— he will be here in an hour. Shannon can help me start dinner”

Allie turned to leave, but her attention was caught on Sirius. “Hey boy, you want to come with me? Or stay here?”

Sirius wagged his tail and trotted after her; like hell he was going to stay in the same room with boisterous, obnoxious, annoying-ass Shannon.

* * *

“What do you think I should wear? The black one or the blue one?”

Allie held up two blouses to Sirius, curled up on the bed. His head perked up, but he simply blinked at her; was she expecting a dog to actually give her fashion advice?

“I agree; the black one” she said after a moment, winking at him.

She slipped her current shirt off to replace it with the black blouse she had chosen. Sirius turned his head away from her with a soft whine— it was nothing he hadn’t seen before, but he felt it was only respectful to look away, especially since she didn’t know the true identity of the shaggy black dog.

“Such a gentleman” Allie giggled, pulling on her blouse “do you have a name? I’d like to call you something”

Sirius turned back to her, wagging his tail. _Name me something cool, something bad-ass…_

“What about Shadow? You want to be called Shadow?”

Sirius stopped wagging his tail. _Shadow?_ No. he was not a Shadow. He much preferred Snuffles, his old canine nickname that James had given him many years ago. He had rolled his eyes when James first suggested it, insisting he make the change to dog permanent and adopt Snuffles as his moniker. He never wanted to be a dog permanently, but Snuffles grew on him after bit.

“Alright, I can take a hint; Shadow is no good. Give me some time to think of something better” she laughed.

He was impressed with how easygoing Allie seemed with just him, she seemed much more relaxed in the presence of an animal than with people. He thought about revealing himself to her right now; they were alone, but selfishly he wanted to play the ‘fly on the wall’ during tonight’s dinner. He wanted to see what this Jack fella was all about.

* * *

“Jack! So good to see you— come in, come in”

Sirius lay in the corner of the dining room on a makeshift bed Shannon made for him out of some throw blankets. He perked his head up, listening to the conversation in the foyer intently.

“Thank you for inviting me, Colleen” a male voice replied “I brought a bottle of wine, I hope everyone likes red?”

“I love red wine, Jack!” Shannon called, her shrill voice made Sirius let out a soft, low growl “Ooh, those are pretty!”

Jack stepped into the kitchen, holding a bottle of wine and a bouquet of roses. _Damn it._ Sirius laid his head down and sighed; Jack was handsome. Jack had flowers. _Fucking flowers._

He was a tall bloke, probably about Allie’s age with broad shoulders and a strong jawline. His dark hair was parted neatly, smoothed into place with a bit of shiny hair gel. Sirius’s canine-strength sense of smell picked up on subtle, fresh cologne that made him smell like an upstanding gentleman. _Damn it._

“Hi, Allie—” Jack said, flashing a pearly white smile “These are for you”

Jack handed Allie the bouquet of roses, her face flushing to match the flowers almost exact.

“Thank you”

Her voice was whisper soft as she gave him a small smile. She whipped around and dug a vase out of the cabinet and placed the bouquet inside. She filled it with a few inches of water, and then set it on the table to serve as the centerpiece for their meal.

“It smells wonderful in here, what are we having?” Jack asked

“Chili— my grandmother’s recipe” Colleen replied, carrying the large pot from the stove over to the dining room table.

“I made the cornbread!” Shannon piped up, plopping into her seat at the table.

“Don’t let her fool you, she only stirred the batter” Colleen laughed

Shannon sneered, shooting her mother an irritated look “Hey, I poured it into the pan too!”

Allie slunk down into her chair quietly, Sirius eyeing her; curious as to what she was thinking. She seemed so relaxed and at ease while they were alone earlier, but now that her gentleman caller had arrived (and her timid personality was overpowered by her boasting, over-energized little sister), Allie had clammed up. Sirius watched as they began their meal, listening to their idle chit chats, trying to piece together their lives based on information Allie had told him, as well as the things they talked about. It seemed like they all worked together; maybe all four of them were working at the Leaky Cauldron?

“That’s a good dog you got there— not even begging at the table!” Jack commented as he turned his attention to Sirius.

_Don’t look at me you overly handsome twit. I will bite you._

“Yeah, he turned up this afternoon— he’s a stray!” Shannon exclaimed

_Shut up, Shannon— you’re annoying._

“What’s his name?” Jack asked

“He doesn’t have one” Shannon said “I think we should name him Bear— do you like that, Allie?”

_Bear?_ No. Absolutely not. He hated it more than Shadow. Allie turned her head and looked at him, frowning as she looked into his eyes.

“No, he doesn’t like that name” She said softly.

Her voice was so angelic; music to Sirius’s ears. These were some one the only words she had spoken the whole dinner.

“How do you know? He doesn’t talk. Come here Bear— come here!”

Shannon patted her leg, looking at Sirius eagerly. Sirius let out a sigh, laying his head down and giving Shannon a contemptuous look. No, he would not be responding to Bear. So unoriginal.

“I told you, he doesn’t like it” Allie said simply.

Dinner went on, Colleen continuously boasting about ‘the twins’ getting sorted into Hufflepuff, and how all the Murphy’s, except Shannon (who did not attend Hogwarts due to her lack of magical ability) and someone named Flynn. Sirius was almost certain Flynn was Allie’s brother who left home and never looked back— that name sounded familiar when he thought hard about it. Much more than this, Sirius didn’t learn much about what Allie had been up to in the last two years.

After dinner, Sirius watched apathetically as Jack assisted with dishes, being the strapping gentleman he just had to be. Allie had maybe only said a total of 20 words the entire meal, her face flushing as red as a tomato every time Jack had smiled at her.

“Well, I should be heading out— thank you for having me over for dinner, Colleen. Your grandmother’s chili is an excellent recipe”

“You are welcome anytime, dear” Colleen smiled “Allison, be a dear and walk Jack to the door?”

“Oh, uh, sure” Allie said whisper soft, blushing and giving him a small smile. 

As she and Jack walked over to the front door, Sirius snuck close by, eager to eavesdrop on their conversation. Once they reached the door, Jack turned back to her— this time; it was him that did the blushing.

“So…I had a nice time tonight”

_I had a nice time tonight_ Sirius mocked in his head _Fucking prat_

“Me too” Allie whispered “Thank you for coming”

“Of course—“he said “Are you free this Friday? Maybe we could go out to dinner, get ice cream at Florean Fortescue’s?”

“Oh—“ Allie flushed as she stammered “uhm…”

“I like you, Allie” he said with a handsome smile “Your sister is a bit overpowering to be around, and I’d like to get to know you from your own account— outside of work”

“Of course” she said softly “Friday”

Jack smiled with relief “Excellent, I’ll pick you up at 7?”

“mhmm” Allie gave him a slight smile and nodded.

Jack leaned down and kissed her tomato red cheek before retreating out the door. Allie bit her lip as she stood in the foyer, giggling softly to herself. Sirius watched her fall into a fit of giddiness from the overly handsome gentleman that just placed a kiss on her cheek. _Damn it._

* * *

“Come on boy, you want to sleep in my room tonight?”

Allie patted her leg, gesturing to Sirius to follow her. This was what he was waiting for to reveal himself; with Colleen and Shannon tucked away in their own rooms; he could finally be alone with Allie. They retreated into her bedroom, Allie shutting the door behind them. She began to dig through her drawers, presumably for pajamas as she hummed an unfamiliar tune softly. Sirius morphed back into his human form, speaking for the first time in over a day.

“Allie—”

His voice was raspy from not talking for so long. Allie spun on her heels and let out a shriek as she jumped back, banging into the dresser. Her face drained of all color, her mouth hanging open as she stared at him, wide-eyed.

“Sirius??”

“Allison? You alright?” Colleen’s voice came hollering from down the hall.

“Quick!— hide!” Allie squeaked

Sirius transformed back into the shaggy black dog just as Colleen burst open Allie’s bedroom door.

“What’s wrong??!” Colleen cried. “Are you alright?”

She looked ridiculous in her pink night robe, fuzzy slippers, and her hair sporting green foam rollers. She looked around the room, exasperated.

“Nothing—“ Allie said softly “I just— uhm— saw a— a mouse.”

“A mouse?” Colleen sighed, “Since when are you afraid of a mouse? They are everywhere in this damn house”

Allie shrugged “sorry…”

Her mother gave her a weak smile “It’s alright— is that dog staying the night?”

Allie paused for a moment; looking between Sirius and her mother “yes” she whispered “He’s been good”

Colleen pursed her lips and nodded “Goodnight sweetheart”

She closed the door; both Sirius and Allie listened to her footsteps retreating down the hall. Allie held up a finger to Sirius, telling him to wait. Once they heard Colleen’s door shut, she nodded to him, and he transformed back into himself.

“What are you doing here?” she whispered

“I promised I’d come visit if I got out” Sirius grinned, “It’s good to see you, kitten”

Allie flushed, giving him a small smile “I can’t believe it’s been you all day”

“Sorry I waited so long to reveal myself” he chuckled.

She giggled, her nose crinkling “It’s alright”

She sunk down on the bed, he joining her as they stared at each other awkwardly for a moment.

“So, uh— how was Azkaban after they moved you?”

He felt stupid the moment the sentence left his lips. _It was fucking prison, you idiot— how do you think it was?_

“It was ok.” She said softly, picking at a loose thread on her bed’s quilt “I was happy when I heard you escaped”

“I swam through the damn North Sea to the mainland— thanks for the idea”

She smiled weakly, “Wilson was angry”

“I’m sure” Sirius laughed

“They asked me about you; Wilson, and Minister Fudge…” her voice trailed off, her face falling.

Sirius sunk down next to her, looking to her intently. The thought that Allie might’ve been questioned over his escape hadn’t even crossed his mind until this moment.

“Tell me about what happened— start from when you were transferred cells,” 

Allie nodded, adjusting herself to sit cross legged on her bed, facing Sirius. “Well, they took me to the medical wing first, and made me drink about 6 different potions…”

Allie’s recount of her medical examination made Sirius’s stomach flip flop. They treated her like she had been assaulted, surely making this sweet girl think that she had done something wrong. She recounted that Fudge was hollering about making sure she wasn’t pregnant— Sirius assumed the many potions they forced down her throat were to insure that she didn’t get pregnant, or if she had already become pregnant, it would take care of that. He felt sick— he should’ve foreseen that, he hadn’t even considered pregnancy as a possible outcome. Forgetting that without wands, neither of them had placed a contraceptive charm. _How could you not have thought of that? Stupid stupid stupid._

“I’m sorry, it’s my fault you went through that—“

“Don’t apologize” she said softly, her sweet voice soothing and reassuring. “After you escaped, Minister Fudge came back to question me with a couple Aurors. He wanted to know if you had told me any plans of your escape; he thought I would know how you did it. They used veritasserum after I wouldn’t talk with the cruciatis curse”

Anger struck him to the very core “He did— _fuck_ — he allowed the use of an _unforgiveable_ on you?” he growled, throwing his face into his hands “Allie I am so _so_ —“

“It’s alright” she held a hand up to silence him “I didn’t tell them anything, even with veritasserum. They didn’t ask the proper questions,”

How was she not angry with him? It was his fault she was tortured and questioned. He couldn’t believe that Fudge actually had the balls to use such a method— or was it lack of balls that made him result to torture?

“Proper questions…?”

“They asked me how you escaped— only I didn’t know how you escaped. I only knew theoretically how I would’ve escaped if I were you. They didn’t ask me how I _thought_ you did it, just how you _actually_ did it.”

Sirius grinned wide as he let out a bark of laughter “you found a loophole with veritasserum— you are one slick chick, Allie Murphy”

The tomato red flush returned to her cheeks as she giggled softly, that adorable giggle that he didn’t realize how much he missed until this very moment. God was it _wonderful_ — He could listen to her giggle all damn day.

“So life after Azkaban— tell me about what you’ve been doing since you were released”

Allie told him all about how her mother had been promoted from a maid to assistant manager of the Leaky Cauldron, hiring Allie on as a server, and Shannon as a maid. She confirmed that the Flynn mentioned at dinner was indeed her brother who left home and never looked back; he had been the only Slytherin in the family. Her other brother, Rory, was a fourth year, and the twins Bridget and Teagan were first years; all in Hufflepuff. Money had been better since her mother’s promotion; they weren’t buying a giant fancy house any time soon, but with Colleen’s salary increase and Shannon holding a job that she wouldn’t be fired from, food was making it onto the table.

“Don’t you have to speak to people to wait tables?” Sirius said with a wry smile

“A little bit” she smiled sheepishly “but it’s mostly scripted— makes it easier”

Sirius laughed softly “and this Jack, he works at the Leaky Cauldron also?”

“Yes, he bartends” 

She spoke in her signature soft voice, biting her lip and seeming embarrassed to mention Jack. Sirius felt a touch of jealousy flood back through him, but he would be damned if he let Allie see that. He needed to remain cool. _We are just old friends, old pals. We never made any promises to each other. Quit getting jealous over Jack. Stupid, handsome, overly-polite Jack…_

“You like this bloke?”

Allie looked away and nodded, giggling nervously “he is sweet on me” she whispered

“I can tell” Sirius gave her a wink “I’m so happy about that you seem to be doing well”

She blushed once again, pausing. After a moment “tell me about you— your name is everywhere”

“Well, I found Peter. Turns out he is alive” Sirius muttered “I failed to catch him though, hence why I’m still wanted”

“ohmygod” she breathed. “I can’t believe he is alive”

He dove into the events of his last two years, from stalking Peter at Hogwarts and just narrowly escaping falling into Ministry custody again when the rat got away, to Harry’s experiences with the tri-wizard tournament and Voldemort’s return.

“The Daily Prophet says Harry is lying, that he is not back”

“The Ministry is lying, not Harry!” Sirius growled “That goddamn asshole Fudge is too paranoid to admit the truth, and many innocent people are going to pay for his ignorance”

Allie bit her lip, worry splashing across her face. She didn’t speak, but Sirius knew she was struggling to wrap her head around the news that Voldemort was back. Hell, most nights he still struggled with the thought, and he’s known for months.

“You remember telling me about the resistance from the first war? The Order of the Phoenix?” Allie nodded “well, we are back in session, working to take down Voldemort and his followers”

“That’s awesome…” she said softly

A smile crept back into her expression, and Sirius took note that she did not flinch at Voldemort’s name. Most witches and wizards would jump and cower at the mere starting syllable, but his name did not seem to affect the introvert before him. 

“You could always join, if you wanted to” he said casually, shrugging slightly

“Me? I—” Allie looked to him incredulously “—I wouldn’t be useful…”

“Everyone has different skills; I know you could be useful to us” he smiled brilliantly “think about it— you don’t have to decide right now”

“Ok,” she bit her lip to conceal another smile “I’ll think about it”

They were silent for a moment before Sirius looked at the clock; it was getting late, and he really should head back to 12 Grimmauld place in the cover of darkness.

“I should be getting back” he said, standing up.

“Already? You can stay, if you like”

“As much as I would love to, I really need to travel in the dark to avoid being seen.” He reached into his pocket and pulled out a small scroll “If you want to join the Order, or even just want to come visit, read this scroll and focus on the words as you apparate. This is the only way you can get into my place— you are welcome anytime” He handed her the scroll, flashing a handsome smile. “It was really good seeing you, kitten”

“You too” she whispered.

His heart fluttered as she stood and rose up on her tip toes to place a soft kiss on his cheek. As she stepped away, her faced flushed her signature tomato red as she chewed her bottom lip. Her blush was adorable, the cutest thing he’d ever seen. _Just old friends. Just old friends saying hello._ He smiled, giving her a nod before disappearing from her bedroom with a soft crack, the vision of her and the world around him compressing into darkness.


	3. 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays!

_“Sirius Black!”_

_“BLOOD TRAITORS! HALF-BREEDS!”_

Thinking he could enter 12 Grimmauld place without waking anyone was a stupid thought, Sirius realized as he was met by Remus and Molly in the foyer upon his arrival. Molly had woken the portrait of Mrs. Black, screaming obscenities at top volume that set Sirius’s teeth on edge.

“Someone shut that old bitch up!” Sirius snarled.

“Where on earth have you been?!” Molly hissed angrily “We’ve been worried _sick!_ ”

“Relax, I was only gone a day”

He shrugged at Molly as Remus took off running up the stairs, wrestling with the portraits curtains. After a minute, the screaming died down, and Sirius could hear himself think again.

“Remus sent an owl after you disappeared!” Molly said, this time lowering her voice “What the hell were you thinking?!”

“I needed to see an old friend” Sirius replied coolly “now, if you’ll excuse me…”

“I think not!” Molly snapped “you are reckless, irresponsible…”

“ _Molly!_ ” Sirius growled, his eyes flickering dangerously “I’m tired, so this conversation is over.”

To his surprise, the Weasley matriarch did not continue speaking, but gave him a harsh stare, pursing her lips irritably. She let out an angry huff, spinning on her heel and marching out of the foyer and towards the staircase to the basement kitchen. Sirius rolled his eyes and began to retreat upstairs towards his room.

“Sirius—”

Sirius turned back to Remus, looking at him disapprovingly.

“You shouldn’t’ve gone.”

“Too late, but I’m back now—” he grumbled “call off the search party”

He made it half way up the stairs before Remus spoke again.

“Did you at least find her?”

“I did” he replied stiffly “I asked her to join the Order. She’s considering it.”

“Are you sure we can trust her?” Remus asked skeptically “you hardly know her”

Sirius turned back, narrowing his eyes at Remus. “I spent nearly every moment with her for an entire month, locked inside a 9x9 cell. That’s a lot of time together— trust me, I know her and the kind of person she is.” He sighed heavily “She knew how I escaped; I told you she was the one who gave me the idea on how to do it. They tortured her— Fudge approved the use of the cruciatis curse on her to try to get her to reveal how I did it. She didn’t talk.” 

Remus pondered this thought for a moment before exhaling in defeat. He pulled out an envelope from the pocket of his pajama robes, outstretching it Sirius. “This letter is for you— I think it’s from Harry”

Sirius came back down a few steps and accepted the letter. Snuffles was scrawled neatly across the front of the envelope, in handwriting he did indeed recognize as Harry’s. In one swift motion, he tore the envelope open and read the letter quickly, his eyes darting back and forth as he shifted lines.

“What does it say?” Remus asked

“His scar has been hurting” Sirius mumbled.

“Well, now that Voldemort is back, it’s bound to hurt more now; especially with their connection” 

“Probably” Sirius sighed “I’ll write him, maybe I can use the floo for a call this weekend”

“Just be careful” Remus warned “With that Umbridge at Hog—“

“Yeah, yeah Moony I know!” he snapped “ _Be careful, stay hidden, blah blah blah—_ “ he added mockingly. “I’m off to bed”

Sirius retreated up the stairs to his bedroom without another comment from the werewolf. He slipped into bed and closed his eyes; images of Harry clutching at his forehead, on his knees gritting his teeth in pain as his scar burned flashed in his mind’s eye. Dumbledore had warned the Order of the potential connection between Harry and Voldemort’s mind, and he was still bitter about not telling Harry about this. The snake-faced tyrant could invade his godson’s mind whenever he pleased, and Harry had _no idea._ Bullshit, if anyone were to ask him.

He would write to him in thie morning, tell him to meet him by the fire in the Gryffindor common room for a call this weekend when no one else would be around. They could chat then; he could hopefully put some of Harry’s fears at ease. If he remembered correctly, a Hogsmeade weekend was coming up the following week— maybe he could venture out, whole up in the cave he spent months in the previous year. His trip to Allie’s only made him want out of the house again more— the taste of freedom left him yearning another chance to get out of the dusty house. Harry was James’s son; surely he would have a sense adventure that would rival that of his father’s.

* * *

“You’re less like your father than I thought—” Sirius gruffed “—the risk would’ve been what made it fun for James”

Sirius yanked his head out of the fireplace and waved his wand, the emerald green flames returning to their natural soft orange hue. He grabbed a water glass off the table and hurled it at the wall; the cup shattered into a million pieces, loudly, and Sirius was amazed he didn’t wake up the portrait of his mother. He waved his wand and repaired the cup, setting it back onto the dining room table and letting out a sigh. He couldn’t believe Harry didn’t want him to come to Hogsmeade for the weekend. He knew the cave he had spent months in was secure; he could’ve hid out in there. James would’ve found the idea of sneaking out exciting; Harry was much less adventurous than he had thought he was.

He sunk down on the chair and rubbed his face furiously. He was tired— it was late and he really should get off to bed, but he couldn’t sleep. Part of his irritability might’ve been partly due to the fact that it had been a week since he gave Allie a scroll to get into the house, and she hadn’t stopped by once. Maybe she was enjoying her time with Jack too much to even remember Sirius. Handsome Jack. Overly helpful Jack. Fucking Jack. He could’ve sworn the idea of joining the Order seemed exciting, but maybe he read her wrong. Hell, at this point, he just wanted her to at least visit, if nothing else— at least just to say hello.

His days continued to be filled with self-loathing and boredom, seasoned with shots of firewhisky. Everyone was continuing their duties for the Order, being productive and valuable members of the resistance, whilst he began to rot away— once again— inside the hallowed walls of his youth. The trees were beginning to turn from deep green to various shades of orange, yellow and red; the crisp smell of falling leaves was pleasant whenever Sirius would open a window, or get to step outside(within the confinements of the house’s Fidelius charm)— it only made him yearn for adventure more.

It wasn’t until a chilly day in October that commotion in the foyer sent Sirius flying out of the drawing room, wand drawn and heart pounding. He stopped dead in his tracks when he discovered the commotion was Remus, Tonks and Molly all three pointing their wands at a terrified, pale-faced Allie, pressing herself against the door with her hands above her head.

“Oi! Lower your wands— she has a scroll!” Sirius bellowed.

Allie let out a squeak of terror as Sirius jumped in front of her, shielding her. His stomach flip-flopped in excitement that she was here— she was actually here.

“This is Allie, the one I told you all about— lower your wands”

“How do you know it’s really her?” Tonks asked, narrowing her eyes

Sirius sighed, feeling as if this were an unnecessary precaution. He turned to her, softening his expression, but speaking apathetically.

“What did your sister want to name me as a dog?”

Allie looked at him, wide eyed and terrified as she opened her mouth to speak, but no words came out.

“I need you to answer me, kitten—please”

Allie was white as a sheet as her eyes darted between the wands pointed at her and Sirius. She let out a barely audible squeak “…Bear”

Sirius turned back to Molly, Tonks and Remus, scowling “It’s her— now lower your damn wands!”

They all stowed their wands back into their robes; Molly crossed her arms and eyed Allie suspiciously.

“You can’t blame us for being cautious—” Remus began

“You should have warned us she was coming!” Molly hissed.

“I didn’t know!” He cried with a hearty chuckle “I’m surprised as you guys are”

Allie’s face was as red as a tomato as she squished herself harder against the door, casting her eyes downward. “I’m sorry, I should’ve owled…”

“No no— they are just jumpy, don’t you mind them” Sirius grinned, “I told you that you were welcome anytime. You want some tea? You hungry?”

Allie smiled weakly, nodding ever so slightly “tea, please” she whispered.

Sirius led her to the basement kitchen, immediately beginning to clank around for a tea kettle and mugs. Allie was silent as she sat at the kitchen table with Molly, Tonks and Remus. Remus and Molly made idle conversation as Tonks studied Allie intently.

“Sirius, does she talk?”

“Tonks—“ Remus said incredulously “That’s incredibly rude…”

“Well, she’s sat there for twenty minutes and hasn’t said a peep!” Tonks said “Tell us about you— Allie, right?”

Allie flushed tomato red as she opened her mouth, only a small squeak came out. Sirius slid into the seat next to her, bumping shoulders with her playfully.

“Don’t you mind Tonks here; she’s a bit rough around the edges. If you really want to get under her skin, call her Nymphadora— don’t you love your first name, Nymphadora??”

“Don’t call me that!”

Tonks threw a biscuit at him. It hit his forehead hard, ricocheting and landing back onto the table. The whole table laughed as Sirius brushed the crumbs off his forehead, muttering crude words under his breath.

“Nymphadora, I always thought it was a pretty name” Allie whispered with the ghost of a smile “I remember you; you were in Hufflepuff…”

“How’d you know that…?” Tonks narrowed her eyes “Wait a second!—“ Tonks’s face lit up in recognition “I _do_ know you! _Mute Murphy!_ I thought you looked familiar— holy shit, what are the odds?”

Allie nodded; “You were in my brother’s year; you liked to prank people”

“That’s me!” Tonks sat up proudly. “Your brother was Flynn? Cocky wanker in Slytherin?” 

Allie nodded again, taking a sip of her tea as she rounded her shoulders forward.

“No shit, I hit him with a slug-vomiting hex our 6th year” Tonks laughed “How come I never saw you much? You just disappeared from your corner of the common room.”

“I dropped out after my 5th year to take of some family matters”

Sirius shot Tonks a look, for which she seemed to understand he didn’t want her to press Allie about her ‘family matters’. Tonks changed the subject hastily. “Well tell us some more about you then; what do you do for work?”

Allie flushed, smiling shyly as she traced the rim of her tea mug with her forefinger. 

“Now come on, don’t be shy.” Tonks teased “We don’t bite”

“I— uhm” she looked at Sirius with uncertainly. He nodded reassuringly. “I work at the Leaky Cauldron”

“There we go!” Tonks cried with a chuckle “and what do you do at the Leaky Cauldron?”

“I serve” Allie said softly

Tonks smirked “Doesn’t serving require talking?” 

Color returned to Allie’s face again as she but her lip and shrugged.

“Yeah, but it’s mostly scripted, so…” Sirius offered, giving Allie a wink. She let out a small giggle, taking a sip of her tea. “Leave the poor girl alone, Tonks” Sirius grinned, placing a hand on Allie’s shoulder. “Come on; let me show you this shithole excuse of a house”

Sirius led her up a few flights of stairs, past the portrait of Mrs. Black and into the dim, dusty hallway littered with bedrooms.

“This room Remus stays in, and this one next to him Tonks usually does. Kingsley is the far bedroom, and Arthur and Molly stay in the one next to him, and this one….” Sirius opened a door with a brass placard mounted to it, the initials S.O.B. engraved into the metal. “Is mine”

“S.O.B.?” Allie chuckled

“Sirius Orion Black” He grumbled, “I used to pretend it meant son of a bitch— my mother was a real charmer…”

They entered the room, Allie taking in the sight of Sirius’s Gryffindor banners and girls in bikini’s posing with motorcycles. Various trinkets were displayed on the bookshelves pushed against one wall, and the room had a few oil lamps attached to the walls. His bed was large, king sized with a slightly moth-eaten quilt that he had carelessly thrown over the mattress. In this moment, Sirius partially wished he would’ve made his bedroom more presentable before bringing her up here— his room looked even more like a teenaged boy’s than a grown man’s with an unkempt bed.

“I decorated this room when I was 12; permanent sticking charms on the posters to drive my parents mad…”

Sirius led her up a level, to a set of more bedrooms. They passed Kreacher on their way up; Allie had said hello softly, but Kreacher ignored them; muttering indecent things about Sirius on his way down the stairs.

“Ignore Kreacher, he’s losing his marbles” Sirius said dismissively. “Now, that bedroom is Harry’s, these two are usually occupied by the Weasley kids and Hermione, and this one—“ Sirius led her into another bedroom “You are welcome to, if you would ever like to stay. If you joined the Order, sometimes it’s easier to spend the night here depending on if we have weekend long meetings”

The room was smaller than his, the walls donning light blue flowered wallpaper that was peeling in the one corner. The bed had a cream colored quilt made neatly, and the curtains were a soft, pale yellow that looked as if they had been white at one point. Allie looked around the room awestruck before turning back to him.

“For me…?” 

“Yeah, it’s not much…” he said sheepishly. “I told you this place was a shithole…”

“No— It’s perfect” she whispered, giving him a small smile. “I would like to join, if you’ll have me”

“Of course— we have to run it by Dumbledore, but I’m sure he’ll be thrilled to have you.” He snaked an arm around her, grinning wide and leading her into the hallway and to a blank portrait. “Phineas! Phineas Nigellus!” 

After a moment, a man appeared, looking at Sirius apathetically. “Could you not shout? It’s incredibly rude…”

“Yeah yeah yeah—“ Sirius waved off the portrait “Could you tell Dumbledore I have a new member that needs ordained? He’ll know what I mean”

“The headmaster is busy, with you know, a _job…_ ” Phineas Nigellus shot him a petulant glance.

“Listen, _most hated headmaster in the history of Hogwarts…_ ” Sirius said snottily “Just relay the message. She’ll be waiting for him here, whenever he gets the chance to pop over tonight”

Phineas Nigellus rolled his eyes “oh alright, I’ll tell him”

The portrait disappeared; Sirius made a crude gesture at the blank frame before turning back to Allie, wrapping an arm around back around her to lead her down the hallway.

“I’ll explain ol’ Phinny here in a bit, there’s more of this bullshit house for you to see”

* * *

Dumbledore arrived that evening, dressed in brilliant sapphire robes that sparkled cleanly in contrast to the ugly, faded wallpaper of 12 Grimmauld Place.

“Miss Murphy, what a pleasure it is to see you” Dumbledore said, giving her a small smile.

“Professor” Allie nodded, speaking in her signature sweet whisper.

“Sirius, I would like to speak with Miss Murphy just the two of us, may we impose on the drawing room?”

“Of course” Sirius grinned as Allie flushed tomato red. “I’ll make us some tea”

Sirius retreated into the kitchen and clanked around for a tea kettle and mugs while Allie and Dumbledore spoke privately. Sirius scowled as Kreacher walked by, muttering insults about half breeds as he retreated into his cubbyhole.

“Kreacher, you watch your mouth!” Sirius growled “Don’t let me hear that shit again!”

He set the table with tea for Allie, Dumbledore and himself, along with a plate of biscuits that Molly had baked earlier that afternoon. After what seemed like ages, Dumbledore floated down the stairs, Allie pitter-pattering behind him. Dumbledore’s blue eyes twinkled over his half-moon spectacles as he gestured up the stairs.

“Sirius, a word?”

“Of course” Sirius nodded “We’ll be back, kitten” he added to Allie with a wink.

Allie settled herself at the table as Sirius and Dumbledore retreated upstairs and into the drawing room. Dumbledore shut the door behind them, and then looked at Sirius earnestly.

“It is my understanding that you and Allison are old friends, somewhat?”

“Yeah, we got paired up in Azkaban, the prison director was an idiot, and there were odd numbers...”

Dumbledore held his hand up to silence him. “It was extremely reckless to leave the house, you know this?”

“Well, er—“ Dumbledore had a way of making him feel like he was 15 again, caught sneaking out of bed at the wee hours of the night.

“And you know it was reckless to give a person access to our headquarters without discussing it with me, first?”

“Last I checked, this was the Black estate.” he said contemptuously “ _Sir._ ”

“Indeed” Dumbledore replied, his eyes twinkling over his glasses “but I believe it was you who volunteered the house as headquarters. Volunteered this house to be a safe place for all of us.”

“Yes...” Sirius said slowly

“But we cannot guarantee the safety of this house to the Order if we are willy-nilly with giving out scrolls”

“We can trust Allie— I know we can”

“I do not doubt that Allison is trustworthy” Dumbledore said, not unkindly “I just ask that you exercise caution before recruiting new members”

Sirius sighed, shifting his weight and nodding stiffly “Yes sir”

Dumbledore gave him a small smile “I do want to thank you again for opening your home to us— it was most gracious of you” Sirius nodded, shifting his weight as Dumbledore studied him. “Well, I best be off. Good night, Sirius”

“Good night, sir”

Sirius stepped into the hallway, surprised to see Allie waiting for him just down the hall.

“Everything alright?” She asked softly “The tea is getting cold…”

“Oh yeah, all good, don’t worry” Sirius grinned, wrapping an arm around her shoulder “forget the tea— I want to show you something else”

* * *

“Stay back, just bow— when he bows back, you can pet him”

Buckbeak clipped its beak at Allie, cocking its head to one side as it studied her. Allie bent over at the waist, giving the hippogriff a polite bow. After a moment, Buckbeak returned the gesture, bowing its head and bending at the knee slightly.

“There you go— good boy, Beaky!” Sirius exclaimed “Alright kitten, you can pet him”

She giggled nervously as she approached Buckbeak, reaching her hand up to gently stroke its satin feathers. Buckbeak nuzzled its head against her shoulder, purring gently.

“See, he likes you!” Sirius said happily

“Hi Buckbeak, I’m Allie” she said softly “You are beautiful”

She stroked its feathers for another minute before Sirius joined her at his side.

“Beaky, I’ll bring you a special treat for dinner tonight—” he said, patting the hippogriff's back. “I’ll be back in just a bit”

Buckbeak seemed pleased by this statement. He led Allie out of the room, his fingertips brushing the small of her back as he gestured for her to exit before him.

“So, you rode him out of the country?”

“Sure did; Buckbeak became my best friend after that night. He and I have been through a lot together”

Sirius and Allie walked down the hall slowly. He was burning to ask her what Dumbledore and she talked about, curious as to what kind of ‘interview’ he had potentially given her.

“So, uh— what did you and Dumbledore talk about?”

He wanted to kick himself the moment the sentence left his lips. He sounded thick, clumsy, and nosey like Peter used to be. Allie didn’t seem bothered by him asking, or if she was, she didn’t show it.

“About me joining up” she replied softly “about what I can do for the Order, the risks involved— that sort of thing”

“What is he having you doing?”

“He wants me to brush up on my magic first before he asks anything of me.” She said, her face falling “dropping out of Hogwarts isn’t doing me any favors. He said he wanted Remus to work with me”

“Well, I could help you with some things too” Sirius was more irritated than he anticipated by Dumbledore asking her to work with Remus instead of him. Sure, Remus had taught at Hogwarts one year, but Sirius was just as good as a student during their boyhood— when he and James weren’t screwing off. “you have how many OWLs?” he continued

“Seven” she replied whisper soft “But since I never moved beyond OWL level…”

“Remus and I will help you with whatever you need to learn.” Sirius interjected “We’ll start tomorrow—come here after work— unless you had plans with… Jack, was it?”

He was playing stupid on purpose this time; he knew Jack’s name. He remembered the way Allie blushed in his presence— sort of like the way she was blushing now, just at the sheer mention of his name. _Handsome Jack, nice Jack…_

“No, I will be here after work”

“Excellent” Sirius clasped his hands “you hungry? I can get something for you…?”

“No, I’m alright” she said softly “I do need to get home though; I don’t want mum or Shannon to worry.”

Sirius walked her to the front door, careful not to accidentally kick the metal umbrella stand in the foyer that Tonks regularly woke Mrs. Black up with. Allie blushed as she rose up on her tip toes, kissing Sirius gently on the cheek.

“See you tomorrow” She said softly.

“See you tomorrow, kitten.”

Sirius watched as she made her way out the front door, apparating on the front lawn. Tomorrow he would be useful. Tomorrow he could be valuable to the Order again. It had been a long time since the prospect of tomorrow had given him excitement, but right now, he could hardly wait for it to be tomorrow.


	4. 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy New Year!

Remus certainly was a better teacher— more patient than Sirius was, he was certain after watching him tutor Allie on basic combative and defensive spells. Sirius had tried to jump in, show her a few tricks, but Remus was able to actually break down technique and really explain magic to her, unlike Sirius, insisting she just ‘do it like this’.

She wasn’t terrible for being a 5th year drop out— just rusty, uncertain of herself and nervous. By the end of their lesson, she was producing a fairly strong shield charm, and effectively performing a few basic dueling hexes and jinxes. She had barely said two words the entire lesson, simply nodding when Remus would give her pointers, and blushing when he praised her. Sirius ended up spending most of the lesson watching from the back of the room after Remus told him he was being a distraction (albeit probably more distracting to Remus than Allie), admiring the way her full hips swayed when she flourished her wand.

“Alright, we’ll end here for the day— how is tomorrow evening for another lesson?” Remus asked

“Uhm, I actually have plans tomorrow evening…” Allie said softly “Would the following day be alright?”

“That’ll work fine,” Remus said with a small smile “Great work today. We’re going to work on these spells again, and start casting them non-verbal.”

“Oh, she’ll be good at that!” Sirius interjected, “She doesn’t like to talk much anyway”

Allie blushed, biting her lip and shrugging her shoulders. Remus turned to Sirius and flashed him a teasing smile.

“Maybe you should take a page from her book, Padfoot” 

“Oh, come off it— you _love_ hearing my angelic voice!” Sirius poked him in the ribs, (“Ow! was that necessary?!”) Then wrapped an arm around Allie’s shoulders “Come on, kitten— you want to help me feed Buckbeak?”

Allie giggled “Yes, absolutely” She turned to Remus, giving him a friendly nod. “Thank you, Remus.”

Sirius whisked Allie away and upstairs, leading her to Buckbeak’s room. He raved to her about how well she did during today’s lesson, admiring her sheepish smile and flushing cheeks. “Really, you’d never know you left school after your 5th year— you were great!…”

Upon entering the room, Sirius grabbed a container from the closet, opening the lid and shaking the container in the direction of the hippogriff. Buckbeak seemed happy to see them (or possibly just happy to smell whatever treat Sirius had in store for dinner), bowing immediately and clicking its beak eagerly.

“Here, you want to feed him?” he offered “these mice are sort of bloody — nasty little buggers if you ask me, but they’re his favorite.”

He handed her the container, surprised when she didn’t even flinch at the sight of the nasty vermin. Allie picked a mouse up, tossing it gently up in the air. Buckbeak caught the dead mouse in midair, chomping happily.

“So, you have plans tomorrow?” Sirius’s words came out clumsier than he expected, and he immediately cursed himself for sounding so awkward. Where were the days everything that came out of his mouth sounded suave?— where he could charm any witch with just simple shake of his hair? A lifetime ago, he concluded. Prison did him no favors.

“Yes.” Allie tossed another mouse at Buckbeak, giggling as it ate exuberantly. 

“What’s on the agenda?” He praised himself for sounding a bit cooler with this sentence. His insides rolled pleasantly as he watched her blush for the 100th time today, wondering how many times she could blush before her face stayed tomato-red permanently.

“Dinner— with Jack”

“Ah, _Jack…_ ” Sirius grinned at her, but the gesture was false— jealously burned deep inside him at the mention of Jack’s name. “So, he must be your boyfriend now, then?”

Allie shrugged, biting her lip and flushing even deeper. 

“He _is!_ ” Sirius teased “tell me, how is he in the sack? Takes good care of you?”

“ _Sirius!_ ” Allie scolded playfully “That’s impolite to ask a lady such things…”

“That bad, huh?” he teased “such a shame, for a handsome bloke to not know how to pleasure his woman…”

“He’s fine!” She squeaked, embarrassment plastered all over her nearly purple face as she covered her face with her hands. “He’s… just _fine…_ ”

He did feel a little guilty about pressing her on such personal matters, but his jealousy was getting the best of him. He didn’t think her cheeks could gain anymore color she was blushing so much. She was squirming right in front of him, but sickly, he liked it. He wanted nothing more than to ask her who was better, but he at least still had a shred of sense to quit berating the girl. Maybe he could get her sloshed off firewhisky and ask then…

“Alright, I’m sorry,” he snickered “I’ll quit teasing you— you want a cup of tea?”

She let out an uncomfortable giggle, shifting her weight as she stared down at her feet. “Yes, please”

They walked down the hall in silence, Allie hardly able to meet his eyes. She didn’t seem angry that he pressed her, but seemed embarrassed to talk about such lewd acts with him. Was she embarrassed simply because of the topic itself, or because it was him— the one who made her writhe and moan in his bunk in Azkaban— asking about another man? Doubt began to grip him— who was he kidding? Jack was handsome, had a job, and was free. A good man who was good for her— despite his jealousy, he didn’t doubt that. What could he give her that Jack couldn’t? A good shag? Hell, the way she blushed and informed him Jack was ‘just fine’ in the sack, maybe he didn’t even have that going for him. Realistically, Allie was only interested in him during their time in prison because they were forced into a cell together. Now that she was free, and he was not, how could she see him as anything worth her time?

* * *

He had thought if he drowned himself in gin, it would keep his mind off Allie spending a lovely evening with Jack. Alas, he was wrong. Instead of sitting in the drawing room mulling over his jealously, he sat in the drawing room _drunkenly_ mulling over his jealously. Which was worse, he did not know. He thought of writing to Harry (whom he was still upset with about not wanting him to come to Hogsmeade this past weekend) to distract him, but his piss-poor mood prevented him from thinking of anything positive he could write. Instead, he sat in the uncomfortable, stained armchair, gripping the bottle tight as he took swigs, imagining Jack’s overly handsome face positioned between Allie’s thighs. He regretfully imagined his kisses and maneuvers of his tongue to please her, as she chanted his name softly over and over.

_Jack… Jack… Jack…_

Jack was probably having his way with her right now, for it was late and dinner was surely over by now. _Sickening._ It should be him pounding into her as she chanted his name.

_Sirius… Sirius… Sirius…_

His throbbing cock was becoming bothersome— maybe it was its fault why he couldn’t stop imagining Allie and Jack bumping uglies, because he needed to relieve some of his own tension. He looked over his shoulder to ensure he was alone before he slipped his hand inside his joggers. He gripped his shaft firmly and started to stroke, a low groan escaping his lips as he imagined those large, youthful breasts bouncing in his face as her hips straddled him. He squeezed himself tighter, trying to imagine his hand feeling as wonderful as Allie’s pussy on the first night he had gotten to have her.

_Sirius… Sirius… Sirius…_

The front door creaked open, then clicked shut. His hand flew out of his pants, his erection deflating almost instantly as he drew his wand and stumbled out of the chair. Who on earth would be coming by this late? He was surprised to find it was Allie standing in the foyer, dressed in a lovely cream-colored sweater and a frame-hugging pair of dark boot-cut jeans, her lips stained the color of wine. She was hanging a black leather coat up on the coat rack, taking extra care not to accidentally bump the iron structure and wake up the screaming portrait of Mrs. Black.

“Hey there, kitten,” he slurred “wasn’t expecting you here tonight…”

“I didn’t know I’d be coming,” she said softly, then frowning. “You’re drunk...”

“Just about!” he said, clasping his hands together “What’cha doing here? I thought you were with the boyfriend.”

“I was earlier.” She replied, not unkindly.

Sirius studied her for a moment, just now noticing her eyes were puffy and rimmed red. Maybe she had a fight with dear old handsome Jack? He pretended not to notice her patchy skin and bloodshot eyes, grinning over enthusiastically and gesturing to the drawing room.

“Fancy a drink?” he asked “I’ve got a whole bottle of gin, and I’m willing to share.”

“Uhm…” She didn’t answer his question, looking to the staircase to her left instead, furrowing her brow “Can— can I stay here? Tonight?”

He was taken aback slightly by her question; of course she could stay, she was always welcome in his home— he had given her a bedroom. His twitching cock and gin-filled stomach would’ve rather her stay in his room instead, however.

“Of course,” he said softly “you’re always welcome”

“Thank you” she whispered, and made her way upstairs. Sirius returned to the drawing room, plopping himself down in his chair and drinking more gin. He flicked his wand at the record player in the corner, putting on some soft rock and roll to ease the silence in the room. Damn good music, he thought. A few minutes later, Allie joined him, eyes less red but demeanor just as melancholy.

“Drink?” 

He shoved the bottle of gin in her direction, holding it to her with a wide, boyish smile. Allie shook her head, not looking at him, but at the tapestry around the room instead. They were as she studied the hideous depictions of the Black family; He watched as she delicately touched the names and pictures of his ancestors, curious as to what she was thinking. 

“Did you come over to study the most ancient and noble House of Black?” Sirius teased “Surely you would rather be with Jack than look at that piece of shit tapestry?”

She smiled weakly, and then slunk down in the seat closest to the arm chair on the creaking sofa.

“Your eyes are red,” he slurred “puffy— have you been crying?”

She shrugged and began to pick at her fingernails. “Just a little”

“You want to talk about it? You guys have a fight?”

“No, My mum and I did.” she whispered. “But I don’t want to talk about it right now.”

Sirius nodded, and then held out the bottle of gin to her again. “Drink? It might help…”

“No, thank you.”

“Suit yourself,” He shrugged and then took another swig of his bottle. “You want to talk about something else?” 

“No."

“Alright.”

They sat in silence, Allie staring at the fire roaring in front of them as the record player played softly in the background. His eyelids felt heavy, his head all of a sudden was the weight of a bowling ball, threatening to roll off his shoulders.

His eyes opened, and he was in his room, blinking a poster of a tanned woman in a blue bikini into view. His head was pounding and his mouth as dry as if he had swished with acetone. He groaned as he sat up, the light coming in the window hurting his eyes. He blinked some more— he was in his bedroom, surrounded by Gryffindor banners and bikini clad women. How did he get here? Last he remembered he was in the drawing room with Allie. Did he pass out? Did she bring him up here?

Sirius made his way downstairs, finding Allie and Remus in the drawing room working on more spells. He walked in right as she shot a reducter curse at one of his mother’s ugly flowered vases, taken aback at the power behind the spell that shattered the vase into a million pieces.

“Damn, that vase didn’t stand a chance…”

His voice was deep and raspy, attesting to the barren dryness that his mouth and throat were. Allie giggled shyly at his compliment as she and Remus turned towards him.

“Good afternoon, sleeping beauty,” Remus said with a wry smirk “It’s nearly 2:00.”

“I blame the gin,” he grinned “How did I get upstairs?”

“Moblicorpus,” Allie said softly “You fell asleep; I thought you would be more comfortable in your own bed.”

“Oh, er— thanks,” he said, awkwardly, then gestured to the two of them “How long you lot been at it?”

“We’ve been working for the last few hours, we can be finished for today though,” Remus said “good work, Allie.”

“Thanks, Remus” She whispered.

She waved to him as he exited the drawing room. Sirius leaned back against the tapestry coated wall, propping himself up with one foot against the wall and the other planted on the ground.

“So how’d you do today?”

“Good, I think—” she shrugged “spells are harder when you can’t say the incantations…”

“It’ll get easier with practice” he said, forcing a smile. After a moment, “So, you want to tell me about why you had been crying last night?”

Allie flushed “I just got into it with my mum, that’s all” she said dismissively

“About Jack…?”

“No,” she shook her head “When I got home from dinner with him, I sat up and talked with mum. I told her about the Order of the Phoenix— well, sort of. I told her I was joining an activist group, that I believed him to be back, and I wanted to fight against it”

Sirius understood the ‘him’ she was talking about was Voldemort. He nodded, listening to her sweet voice as he forced himself to ignore his pounding headache. Maybe he did indeed have too much gin last night…

“She doesn’t want me to fight this war,” Allie whispered “She thinks I should keep my head down, get married and start a family. Live a quiet life. She doesn’t understand why I joined.”

“Why exactly did you join?”

He wished for nothing more than for her to say she joined for him, to be near him and with him, but he shut the thought down. _She has a boyfriend, you git. She isn’t interested in you like that. You were a one time thing._

“Because I love my sister,” she said heavily “Life for squibs would get worse under his command, and she has a hard enough time as it is.”

Shannon, _of course_ — he hadn’t even had a thought on how a member of Allie’s family would be affected by Voldemort’s regime, despite their pureblood status. Squibs were almost worse than Muggle-borns in the eyes of the Death Eaters.

“Did you tell her that?”

“Of course,” she said “But she doesn’t listen well when she is upset.”

“Did she kick you out?” Sirius asked “Is that why you stayed here last night?”

“No,” she said, shaking her head “but I didn’t want to be in the same house as her. It was a bad fight. That’s why I came here.”

“You didn’t want to go to Jack’s?”

“I— uhm—“ Allie flushed scarlet, opening and closing her mouth before rising from the couch. “I should probably try to talk to her again, maybe I can reason with her now that she’s cooled down”

“Oh, sure” Sirius fumbled. “Well, the door is open for you if you need to crash here again”

Allie nodded, walking up to him and placing a kiss on his cheek. “Thank you, Sirius”

Sirius stared at her as she pulled away, wishing he would’ve shaved so his stubble wouldn’t scratch those pillow soft lips of hers. He locked eyes with her, an odd tension building up between.

“Oi! Sirius!” Mundungus Fletcher’s rough voice called through the doorway “Got some news for ya— this the little mute I hear joined us?”

Allie stepped away quickly, as Sirius scowled at Mundungus for interrupting the moment he was about to have.

“Er— yeah, this is Allie Murphy” Sirius gestured between her and Mundungus “Allie, this is Mundungus Fletcher. Don’t buy anything off him, anything he sells he stole…”

“Oh, come off it!” Mundungus cried “You buy stuff off me all the time—“ he nodded to her politely “pleasure to meet you, sweetheart.”

She waved her hand ever so slightly, “Hello” she whispered.

“So what’s news you speak of?” Sirius asked.

“The kids are forming a little club— a Defense Against the Dark Arts group, right under Umbridge’s nose. Overheard ‘em at the Hogshead.”

Sirius was baffled proud at this news; maybe Harry was more like James than he had given him credit a few weeks ago.

“The kids were chattin’ as if they thought no one was listenin’” Mundungus continued “They need a lesson on secrecy”

“I’ll have to tell them— don’t tell Molly just yet,” Sirius let out a chuckle “She’ll go bananas”

Mundungus let out a wheezy laugh “I’ll let you break the news to her; I’d like to keep my nuts this week”

Mundungus bid them farewell and slunk out of the room, undoubtedly to the basement kitchen to break into Sirius’s vast liquor collection.

“Crazy kids,” Sirius’s smile beamed with pride “I’ll have to floo call them, tell them to be careful. I think it’s a good idea though, better to be prepared in an emergency than to be sitting ducks.”

“Just be careful,” Allie said softly “Don’t get caught.”

“Nah, don’t worry about me, I’ll be fine” he waved her off “What are they going to do, yank me out of the fireplace and cart me back to Azkaban?”

“ _Sirius,_ ” Allie said, softly but sharply— very unlike her signature angelic tone “Do _not_ get put back in prison— surely you won’t be able to escape a second time. Promise me you will be careful.”

Sirius was taken aback by her intensity; he blinked at her a few times before nodding stiffly. “I’ll be careful, kitten— I promise.”

Allie paused for a moment, chewing on her thoughts before nodding and smiling weakly “I’ll see you later this week.”

He watched her exit the room, hips swaying as she glided effortlessly. He listened to the front door creak open, and then latch quietly, knowing now she was gone. He felt a pang of excitement to speak with Harry— he couldn’t wait to tell him how proud he was, what a good idea this club was, but Allie’s sharp words still replayed in the back of his mind. _Don’t get yourself put back in prison; you won’t escape a second time._ He had called the Gryffindor common room many times now with no issues. This would be just another simple floo call, quick— no one would ever know. What was the worst that could happen?


	5. 5

“Now, where are you going to have these secret meetings at?”

Sirius smiled out at Harry, Ron and Hermione sitting in a semi-circle around the hearth rug in the Gryffindor common room. The emerald flames of the fireplace gently licked at his face, the diminished heat comfortable thanks to the floo network. Crookshanks mewed in Hermione’s lap, trying to weasel out of her embrace to get closer to his head.

“We dunno,” Ron said “Looks like the Hogs Head is out,”

“And the Shrieking Shack is far too small for 28 of us…” Hermione added.

Sirius frowned; the Shrieking Shack would’ve been his suggestion for their secret Defense Against the Dark Arts club. He wracked his brain for a moment, but no ideas came to him.

“Well, I’ll have a think and get back with—… _what the…_ ”

To his left, a stubby, small hand covered in antique rings was reaching though the side of the fireplace. He went to pull his head out, but as he was half way out, the hand grabbed ahold of a lock of his untidy dark hair, attempting to pull him back through the fireplace. He yanked back with all his might, struggling until a patch of his scalp gave way, ripping off as he went flying out of the fireplace and skidding across the kitchen floor.

“AQUA ERECTO! AQUA ERECTO!”

Water jetted from his wand, extinguishing the flames where his head had been just moments earlier. He panted heavily, reaching up to feel a wet warmth seeping from his head and down his neck. He pulled his hand away; Blood, and lots of it.

_Bitch ripped my fucking scalp._

The floo network was no longer safe; Umbridge must be watching the fireplaces. It was the only way he could’ve been detected. His adrenaline was off the charts, his heart felt like it was going to explode in his chest— Allie’s soft, sharp voice rang in the back of his mind once more.

_Don’t get yourself put back in prison; you won’t escape a second time._

Had Umbridge gotten ahold of a larger bit of hair, or he wasn’t as willing to part with a chunk of his flesh, that’s exactly where he would’ve ended up.

* * *

“Alright, so I have made this month’s patrolling schedule— providing you think Allison is ready to take her shifts, Remus?”

Dumbledore stood at the head of the basement kitchen table, dressed in crisp silver robes that contrasted with the dinginess of the kitchen. His eyes twinkled as he gestured to Remus to his left.

“Yes—“ Remus said as he shifted in his chair “She has done exceptional with her lessons, her combative and defensive spells are up to par. We are still struggling with producing the patronus charm, however.”

Allie turned bright red, squirming in her chair slightly as she stared into her lap. Sirius could tell she was embarrassed by this; she shouldn’t be, in his mind. It took him a lot of practice to produce even a somewhat decent patronus.

“Understandably so,” Dumbledore said, smiling slightly “The patronus charm is particularly difficult. I will put Arthur on patrol with Allison for the meantime until she can produce a discernable patronus— for communication reasons, of course.”

“I’d be delighted,” Arthur interjected, nodding to Dumbledore, then to Allie.

“Alright then— please check the parchment in the middle of the table,” Dumbledore waved his hand, and a scroll of parchment appeared in the center of the oak table. “I will see you all in two weeks, unless something comes up. Meeting adjourned.”

The Order began to disband, passing the patrol schedule scroll around the table as Sirius rose, taking his plate to the kitchen sink. He felt rough hands grab his head, jerking it in position that made his neck twinge uncomfortably.

“Oi, what happened to your head?”

It was Tonks who’d been first to notice the large scab on the back of Sirius’s head. He turned around and swatted Tonks away from him, but everyone’s attention now fell on him.

“Nothing,” he growled. “It’s nothing.”

“Doesn’t look like nothing— it looks like something bit the back of your head,” she insisted “What’d you get into?”

Sirius felt self-conscious with all eyes on him, wishing that Tonks had just kept her big mouth shut. Molly and Remus both looked at him appraisingly, but their firm stares weren’t as intrusive as Mad-eye Moody’s magical eye. It whirred about, seeming to inspect every inch of him.

“Sirius, might this be from your floo activity with the Gryffindor common room last night?” Dumbledore asked.

“…It was.” he admitted.

“Not much goes on at Hogwarts that I don’t know about,” Dumbledore said, his eyes twinkling “However, I didn’t know she had actually gotten ahold of you.”

“Yeah, old bat tore my scalp;” he grumbled “But I wasn’t going to let her get me without a fight.”

“Caution is of the upmost importance,” Dumbledore said “I believe Dolores Umbridge to have all the fireplaces at Hogwarts under surveillance. I would recommend refraining from using the floo network to communicate with Harry from now on.”

Sirius sighed heavily “yeah— I figured as much.”

It seemed like ages before most of the Order either flooed home or retreated to their rooms upstairs. Sirius offered to clean up dishes from the dinner Molly had cooked, more so to stay busy to avoid a lecture from her or Remus about being careful. When the kitchen was quiet, he thought he was alone, and turned to head up the stairs but was startled by Allie standing in the middle of the kitchen. He jumped slightly, clutching his chest and letting out a soft chuckle.

“Damn kitten, you scared me,” he laughed “I thought everyone was gone.”

“Sorry…” she whispered, and stepped around him. She reached up and brushed his untidy dark hair away from the scab, tracing the outline of the wound with a feather-light touch.

“I was being careful, I promise.” He said softly.

She nodded, and then retreated her hand away from him. “I won’t be able to be here as much. I have quite a few patrol days scheduled, and between work and everything else…”

“I understand,” Sirius said, his heart sinking slightly to know his time with her would be limited “The house is open to you whenever you get the chance to come by.”

Allie gave him a sad smile. “What is it that we are guarding? Dumbledore didn’t tell me, but he said it was essential that it didn’t fall into the wrong hands.”

“I don’t know what it is,” Sirius said heavily “he didn’t tell any of us, guess he thinks it’s safer if we don’t know.”

She nodded, shifting her weight awkwardly. “I should get home; I have to work breakfast shift tomorrow.”

“Alright, I’ll just see you around, I guess” Sirius said, forcing a smile.

She nodded again, then turned and exited the kitchen, pitter-pattering up the stairs with soft steps. His heart was heavy; not only was he disappointed to hear Allie wouldn’t be around as much as she had, but he wasn’t thrilled about not talking to Harry for the foreseeable future either. His godson needed him, his godson was his family. He wasn’t going to be able to hear about where they chose to meet for his secret club, or how their meetings would be going from here.

Now, he felt even more isolated in this dreadful, creaky house, as if the might of the odds against him were pushing in on all sides, trying to snatch anything that made him feel remotely human from him. This house was a prison, he had said that from the moment he stepped back inside these hallowed walls, but now, he truly felt the same sense of incarceration that he had experienced for 12 years inside Azkaban. There was nothing to do but accept his fate at this point— he would most likely die a prisoner inside these walls, never to walk this earth as a free man again.

That night, he set his alarm for early— his prison routine had kept him sane for many years, so it was time for him to return to what was familiar.

The alarm rang at 6:30am sharp. His feet hit the cool bedroom floor with contempt, stepping out of bed and yawning a few times before positioning himself on the floor in the push-up plank position to begin the morning workout routine he had followed for so many of those lonely, isolated years.

“1…2…3…”

* * *

The weather grew colder, as well as Sirius’s grumpiness. The holidays were beginning to near, and it seemed like everyone in the Order were busier outside of 12 Grimmauld place than in. Allie still came by for lessons with Remus, which she was doing quite well with, but hadn’t been around in her free time as much as Sirius would’ve liked her to be. He understood that she had her family, her job, even now duties for the Order, but he couldn’t shake the feeling that when she wasn’t there at night on the weekends, she was in Jack’s bed, getting everything she deserved from that overly handsome bloke.

She was certainly a good house guest when she was around— she would always sit next to him during meals and meetings, be the first to volunteer to clean up meals or prepare tea for the group. She never declined when he offered to let her feed Buckbeak, either— he loved the way her face lit up as she would watch the hippogriff chomp on his mice. The house seemed brighter with her in the house, as if her angelic aura uplifted the entire atmosphere.

But sitting alone in the dank, depressing walls of his youth, his only conversation-able company a lunatic creature who loathed him, the house seemed more depressing than ever. He found himself leaning on bottles of firewhisky, gin and scotch to get him through his days, sometimes not seeing a single member of the Order for days on end. His grumpiness was translating into his relationships, instead of being happy when company came over, he was resentful.

He had spent this chilly December evening as usual, having dinner in the basement kitchen with a lone candlestick as his companion, then retreating into the drawing room and drinking until he had to crawl to his bed. He was halfway through a bottle of scotch when a knock came at the drawing room door, drawing his attention in that direction.

“Hey,” Allie’s sweet voice was as smooth as velvet. “I brought you something— a book.”

Allie walked to his side and handed him a tattered hardback copy of Lord of the Flies. Sirius glanced at the cover before tossing it onto the coffee table in front of him. This particular novel was one of his favorites; he was always happy to read it when the library cart would roll by and toss it into this cell.

“Read this one a few times in Azkaban,” he grumbled, his voice gravelly from his drink “a few dozen times, in fact.”

His tone would’ve given the impressed he was less than enthused with her gesture, and based on Allie’s flushed cheeks, that is exactly how she took it. She nodded stiffly, and then stepped over to the wall closest to her, observing the Black family tapestry as she did very frequently in the house. She reached out and traced a finger over the name Bellatrix Black, and then over a marriage line to the name Rodolphus Lestrange.

“You always stare at that damn tapestry,” he said “As if you are expecting the names to change.”

“I just find it curious, that’s all,” she said softly “your family tree is so big.”

“You don’t really find that bullshit curious, do you?” he said snottily.

She shrugged, tracing her fingers over another branch of the tree and finding Sirius’s charred face.

“Well, looks like you need some other form of entertainment” he grumbled. “And I would’ve thought life on the outside would be full of it...”

Allie opened and closed her mouth a couple times as color flooded her face again. Her expression hardened before speaking again, just above a whisper. “I’m sorry; I didn’t mean to impose on your evening.”

She turned and walked quickly out of the drawing room. Panic set in— he didn’t want her to go. His fault though, he realized, for being a right git to her for no reason. He jumped up and chased after her, following her to the foyer. She was hastily throwing her travelling cloak on over her shoulders, her eyes glistening.

“Where you going?” he asked “Allie— Allie _wait._ “

He grabbed ahold of her shoulder— albeit probably a touch too firm, he deduced from the way she flinched. He loosened his grip, but kept his hand on her, as if this would keep her from walking out the front door.

“I’m going home, since you aren’t in a very pleasant mood.” She said simply

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to be rude—“ he said quickly “I was being a dick, I didn’t mean to be. Please, don’t go— stay, have a drink with me?”

She looked at him, blinking, brow slightly furrowed.

“Stay, please—” He repeated breathlessly “stay.”

Her expression softened. After a moment, she nodded. “Alright”

She hung her travelling cloak back onto the coat rack and followed him back into the drawing room. Sirius flicked his wand at the record player, soft melodies now floating through the room as he poured the two of them glasses of scotch. She sunk down onto the couch, tucking her legs up underneath her.

“I read Lord of the Flies dozens of times in Azkaban because it was one of my favorites,” He said as he handed her a glass. “It was very thoughtful of you to bring it by this evening, thank you.”

“I thought you would like that one,” she said softly, tracing the rim of her glass. After a moment; “Are you going to tell me what’s wrong?”

“It’s nothing.” Sirius muttered softly

“If it were nothing, you wouldn’t’ve been a jerk,” She said “Was it something I did or said?”

“No,” he said, the words catching in his throat “No— it’s not you— I’ve… I’ve just been a little grumpy lately, that’s all. I didn’t mean to take it out on you.”

“Because you are stuck inside?” she asked “You feel like you traded one prison for another?”

“Took the words right out of my head,” he said, astonished “You secretly a legilimens?”

Allie blushed, shaking her head. “It’s how I would feel.”

“I hate it here,” Sirius said suddenly “This place is terrible— I’m trapped inside this piece of shit, being completely useless, while you all are out making a difference. I can’t even be available to my own godson— what good am I? What was even the point of escaping prison in the first place?”

He hadn’t been so honest with someone in a very _very_ long time. He gripped his knees tightly and clenched his jaw, trying to remain calm. He didn’t want to lose it in front of her.

“Hey—“ she took his hand with a gentle touch. “You give the Order a safe place to meet. You give Remus hot meals since he can’t afford them on his own. You give Harry someone to call his family.”

Sirius looked into Allie’s soft green eyes, feeling comforted by her sweet voice and soft thumb brushing over his knuckles.

“You are worth so much to many of us, even if you don’t see it yourself right now.”

He gave her a sad smile, feeling gracious that she stayed and provided him with these words of comfort.

“Are you lonely?” she asked softly.

Sirius paused for a moment, embarrassed to answer her question, but felt compelled to continue to be honest. “Yes.”

“I know what it’s like to be lonely,” she said “Sometimes I feel lonely too— but when I am with you, I don’t feel lonely anymore.”

Sirius felt warmth in his belly spread throughout his entire body. It could’ve been Allie’s words that did it, or it could’ve been the half bottle of scotch he had had since dinner. “I don’t feel lonely when I am with you, either.”

They stared at each other for a moment; the intimacy of looking into each other’s eyes for a prolonged period of time gave him the strong urge to lean forward and kiss her. Unfortunately before he could even dream of being so bold, the nasally, contemptuous voice of Phineas Nigellus echoed through the house.

“Sirius? Oh, Sirius? Where are you? It’s not like you have gone out for a stroll…”

“BLOOD TRAITORS! VILE FILTH IN MY HOME!”

“ _Shit—_ “ Sirius growled “Can you shut my mother up?”

They ran up the stairs, Allie wrestling with the curtains that covered the portrait of Mrs. Black as Sirius found his way over to Phineas Nigellus’s frame.

“What do you want, Phinny?” He grumbled

“How many times do I have to tell you, do not call me that!” The portrait snapped “I have a message from Dumbledore: Arthur Weasley has been gravely injured, and his wife, children and Harry Potter will be coming to stay.”

He opened his mouth to speal, but the words caught in this throat— Arthur had been on duty for the Order last night, what on earth happened? He wanted to ask Phineas Nigellus a billion questions, but refrained; he’d speak with the kids.

“I would be delighted to have them,” were the only words he could form. Phineas Nigellus disappeared back into the portrait, leaving Sirius and Allie standing in the hallway in a moment of silence.

“Arthur was on duty last night,” Allie said softly

“I know,” Sirius said “maybe he—“

His words were interrupted by the sound of footsteps thundering in the basement kitchen. Sirius grabbed Allie’s hand and took off, running into the kitchen hastily.

“What’s going on?” he asked impatiently “Phineas Nigellus said Arthur’s been badly injured.”

“Ask Harry!” Fred chirped

“Yeah, I want to hear this for myself” George added.

“I had a— a kind of… vision, I guess.”

Harry described a gruesome scene of Arthur being mauled by a snake— a giant snake, most likely the filthy beast Voldemort kept slithering next to him. Sirius felt sick deep in the pit of his stomach listening to Harry recount the scene as if he had court-side seats to the encounter, but didn’t allow his face to show his concern. He needed to keep a calm, brave face for the kids.

“Is mum here?” Fred asked

“She probably doesn’t even know yet, the important thing was getting you away before Umbridge noticed you were all out of bed. I’m sure Dumbledore is informing Molly now.”

“We’ve got to go to St. Mungos!” Ginny said quickly “Sirius, can you lend us cloaks or anything?”

“Hold on— you can’t go tearing off to St Mungo’s!” Sirius cried

“Yes we can, if we want!” George said with a mulish expression “he’s our dad!”

“And how are you going to explain how you knew Arthur was attacked even before the hospital let his wife know?”

“What does that matter?” Fred interjected.

“Because we don’t want to let anyone know that Harry is having visions of things happening hundreds of miles away,” Sirius said firmly “Do you have any idea what the Ministry would make of that information?”

“Somebody else could’ve told us,” Ginny suggested

“Like who?” Sirius asked impatiently “look, your dad’s been hurt while on duty for the Order, the circumstances are fishy enough without his children knowing about it seconds after it happened. You could seriously damage the Order’s—“

“We don’t care about the dumb Order!” shouted Fred.

“It’s our dad dying, were talking about!” yelled George.

“Your father knew what he was getting into, and he won’t thank you for messing things up!” Sirius cried, anger and frustration rising inside him “This is how it is; this is why you’re not in the Order.” Sirius paused for a moment, taking a deep breath “You don’t understand, there are things worth dying for—“

“Easy for you to say, stuck here” bellowed Fred. “I don’t see you risking your own neck.”

Sirius felt the color drain from his face as he felt anger surge through him. Had Fred not been a child, he would’ve clocked him straight in the jaw. Didn’t he realize that he wanted to be out risking his neck for the Order? He craved to be able to do what the other members were doing. Allie seemed to pick up on how Fred’s words affected Sirius, stepping in and speaking louder than Sirius had ever heard her.

“I know it’s hard, but we’ve all got to stay put.” She said calmly, but firmly “At least until we hear from Molly, all right?”

“And who the hell is are you?” George asked “Who is she? I don’t remember her from this summer”

“This is Allie Murphy. She is part of the Order as well. She wasn’t around this summer so you haven’t met her, but she understands also that we need to stay put until we receive word from your mother.” Sirius said.

The kids all blinked at Sirius and Allie, while Fred and George seemed to be chewing back more retorts. After a few moments, one by one the kids started taking seats at the kitchen table.

“That’s right, come on, let’s all have a drink while we’re waiting— _Accio butterbeer!_ ”

The silence was deafening through the kitchen as everyone drank their butterbeers. The anxiety plastered on all the Weasley children’s faced made him wish there was something he could say or do make them all feel better about this situation, but the hard truth was that he was powerless. Arthur may very well die, and there would be no comforting through that.

He looked over at Allie, looking worried but not uncomfortable by the silence, sipping her butterbeer periodically.

“Kitten, you don’t have to stay;” Sirius said softly “I know it’s late,”

“I would like to stay,” she said with a weak smile “Arthur is my friend, he and I have spent a lot of time together.” 

Sirius gave her a half smile. “Alright.”

She leaned back into her chair and took a sip of her butterbeer. Her eyes looked heavy, she looked exhausted— they all did, but despite how tired they all were, no one was going to get any sleep until they knew the fate of Arthur. Sirius followed her lead and leaned back in his own chair, sighing heavily. They were in for a long night.


	6. 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for the feedback and kudos so far!! I appreciate every comment, kudo and subscription so so much!

How many hours had it been? At his point, he could hardly make sense of how long he, the Weasley children, Harry and Allie had all sat hunched over the kitchen table, awaiting news on Arthur’s condition. Ginny and Ron both looked so tired their eyes were crossing. Fred and George were leaning back in their chairs, staring at the ceiling and rhythmically tapping their fingertips on the table. Harry and he exchanged awkward looks periodically, both feeling like intruders on a family crisis. Allie sat next to him with her arms folded on the table, resting her chin atop them a she gently blew puffs of air at a lone curl hanging in her face. Sirius had stared at her for an indeterminable amount of time, watching that vibrant, spiraled lock of hair sway from her breath over and over and over…

He was so tired, yet had quite a bit of energy on reserve that he chalked up to anticipation and concern. Two— maybe three— hours ago he had suggested everyone try to get some sleep, but his suggestion fell on deaf ears. After a long night, the kitchen door swung open at ten past five; all of them jumped to their feet as Molly bustled into the kitchen.

“He’s going to be alright,” Molly said, her voice weak with tiredness “He’s going to be alright— we can go and see him later. Bill is with him now; he’s taking the morning off work.”

Immense relief flooded through Sirius. Had Arthur not made it— well… he wasn’t quite sure what he would’ve made of that, let alone what his wife and children would’ve made of that. However, he wasn’t going to have to make anything of it, since Molly came bearing good news. His eyes scanned the group— they all looked exhausted, famished. They should eat before getting some well-deserved shut eye.

“Breakfast!” said Sirius joyfully, clapping his hands together “Where’s that accursed house elf? Kreacher?! KREACHER!... oh, that good for nothing—“

“I’ll cook, Sirius; it’s alright— “Allie said sweetly. Sirius’s heart nearly leapt out of his chest as she placed a delicate hand on his shoulder. Her touch was so gentle, so comforting. His name spoken by her was lovelier than a gentle spring breeze. ”—breakfast for how many…?”

“Let’s see… 8!—Bacon and eggs? And some tea? How about some toast?”

“I’ll make the toast.” Harry said quickly, immediately hustling over to the pantry. Allie pulled a large skillet out of the cabinet and fired up the stove, shooing Sirius away when he tried to jump in to help. 

“You set the table— Harry and I can handle breakfast,” Allie said with a soft giggle “You’ll just get in my way.”

 _“Yes ma’am…”_ said Sirius playfully. He flicked his wand and magicked plates, cups and silverware to the table. He was about to pull out some orange juice from the fridge when Molly unexpectedly grabbed him and pulled him into a tight hug.

“Sirius, thank you for looking after the kids last night,” Molly said “I appreciate it so _so_ much.”

“Of course,” Sirius choked through her boa constrictor-strength grip “I was pleased to be able to help—“ Molly released him and he gestured to the rest of the Weasley’s around the table. “—I hope that you all will stay as long as Arthur is in the hospital.”

“Oh Sirius, I’m so grateful,” Molly said “they think he’ll be there a little while and it would be wonderful to be nearer. Of course, that might mean we’re here for Christmas…?”

“Why, the more, the merrier!!”

Her tone was questioning whether or not it would be alright by Sirius to intrude on his holiday. He was thrilled to hear he would have house guests for Christmas— nothing would make him happier. He had avoided all thoughts of the impending holiday, not wanting the reminder that his holiday feast would be one in solitary. 

He was all of a sudden thankful for the situation at hand; for it brought him a house full of people. …did that make him a terrible person? To be somewhat happy that his friend was lying in a hospital bed? Surely he wasn’t happy that Arthur was hurt, just happy his family would be staying for the holiday, that’s all. Still, he thought it best to keep this thought to himself.

“Uh Sirius, could I have a quick word? Now?”

Harry grabbed the sleeve of his shirt and pulled him into the pantry. His expression was troubling— he looked like he had the weight of the world sitting atop his shoulders.

“What’s going on?” Sirius asked quietly.

Harry proceeded to rehash the details of his vision of Arthur’s attack, however sharing that instead of watching the scene from the sidelines, he was seeing the event through the eyes of the snake. Sirius listened, hanging onto every word. It was… odd, for Harry to have had this vision through the snake’s point of view.

“Did you tell Dumbledore this?” Sirius asked

“Yes!” Harry said impatiently “But he didn’t tell me what it meant! Well, he doesn’t tell me anything anymore, really.”

This detail was troubling, but he fought to keep his tone even and his face straight. There was no need to get Harry all worked up— especially not until Sirius could speak with Dumbledore about this.

“I’m sure he would’ve told you if it were anything to worry about.” He said steadily

“But that’s not all” Harry whispered “Sirius, I— I think I’m going mad. Back in Dumbledore’s office, just before we took the portkey I actually felt like the snake. I wanted to attack him, for a few seconds.”

“It must’ve been the aftermath of the vision, that’s all. You must’ve still been thinking of the dream—”

“But that’s not it!” Harry said impatiently “I— I think there is a snake inside me, like I am becoming the snake! Becoming a _weapon!”_

Could this be true? Could there be some type of possession happening, or strange human transfiguration? No, that’s impossible. He was asleep in his bed at Hogwarts at the time, they had established that already. Maybe Harry had seer blood in his line— but if that were true, wouldn’t James have mentioned that at some point…?

“You need to sleep.” He said firmly “you are going to have breakfast, then go up to bed. You can visit Arthur with the others after bit. You’re in _shock_ Harry, you witnessed something horrible— lucky you did, really, or Arthur might’ve died. Just stop worrying.”

He clapped a hand on Harry’s shoulder and gave him a reassuring smile, hoping that his godson wouldn’t see though his calm façade. 

* * *

The impending holiday had truly lifted Sirius’s spirits. The house full of people (even the Order members who came and went only for meals) really livened up the place. With help from the kids, Allie and Molly, the house was decorated magnificently. Garlands of brilliant silver, gold and red were strung from the ceilings. Ornaments of every size, shape and finish were dangling about, and a handsome Christmas tree as tall as the ceiling was nestled in the corner of the drawing room, decorated with live fairies. The moth eaten portions of carpet were covered with magical snow, and the creepy, decapitated heads of the family’s previous house elves wore Father Christmas hats and beards.

He felt happier than he had in a very long time. He wasn’t quite sure exactly why his mood had gone from sullen to jovial in a matter of nothing, but while he was feeling good, he wanted everyone else around him feeling just as good. He even tried to spread the cheer to Buckbeak, who nipped at him irritably when he attempted to hang garlands and redecorate its room with shimmering magical snow.

He insisted everyone sing Christmas carols whenever they felt so inclined. He took to this suggestion himself, singing classic songs as he would work in the kitchen or singing at top volume as he dragged Allie by the wrist to feed Buckbeak.

_“Come on kitten, sing with me!— God rest ye merry hippogriffs…”_

The only negative the holiday prep was Molly’s insistence on playing Celestina Warbeck’s entire career on a loop— if he had to hear _‘a cauldron full of hot strong love’_ one more _fucking_ time…

His saving grace came when the wireless shorted out, leaving Molly to bang the device on the coffee table in an attempt to get it working. Sirius snickered under his breath when he noticed Allie stowing her wand in her pocket, inconspicuous in the corner by herself. He marched up to her and pulled her around the corner, grinning. 

“Did you confund Molly’s wireless?”

Allie flushed tomato red, giggling nervously as she fought the guilty smile creeping across her expression.

“I hate Celestina Warbeck.” she whispered

“It’s always the quiet ones you have to watch out for,” said Sirius, winking “But you, Allie Murphy, are a hero. We were all going to lose our minds if we had to listen to another second of that garbage…”

He wrapped an arm around her led her back into the living room, enjoying the sight of Molly still banging her wireless against the coffee table.

“Molly, here— let me help you with the music…”

Thankful to be rid of Celestina’s less than desirable warbles, he put on music through the record player that was received much better by the group. He danced around by himself as he sang along for the first couple minutes, and then pulled Allie into a playful waltz. She blushed as he swung her around the room, laughing as they stepped on each other’s feet. He admired the way her curls splayed out as he spun her around and around, the lamplight illuminating her orange strands.

However, the holiday cheer was quickly squashed Christmas morning when Sirius found Molly sobbing into a hand-knitted sweater. Remus was attempting to console her, but seeming to not have much luck.

“Everything alright…?” he asked slowly

“Percy sent his Christmas sweater back,” Remus said softly, patting Molly on the back gently.

“Oh…” Sirius was at a loss for words. Percy Weasley was the black sheep of their family, a real wanker from all the animosity Arthur had told him about. Sirius wasn’t sure what to do or say in this moment for her— should he tell her that her son is just being a git and that she shouldn’t let it upset her? It was true, but chances were Molly wouldn’t want to hear that, so Sirius felt it best to keep his mouth shut.

Once Molly had calmed down, Christmas day went smoothly. They all had breakfast, and then most of the house ventured out to St. Mungo’s to visit Arthur. Even though the house was quiet for a good chunk of the afternoon, once everyone had returned, the holiday cheer resumed. Sirius slung glasses of eggnog at anyone with an empty hand, wondering where the hell his house elf was instead of serving the eggnog for him. Surely the accursed beast was hiding upstairs, probably crying over his mother’s old bloomers or something of the sort.

Just when he thought Christmas couldn’t get any better, Allie stopped by later in the evening. She entered the house shaking snow out of her mane of curls, and wiping her feet thoroughly on the front rug. In her hands was a small red box, no larger than a snuff box, tied shut with a shimmering gold ribbon.

“Merry Christmas,” Sirius said with a large smile. “What can I get you to drink? Egg nog? Brandy?”

“Eggnog would be lovely,” she said sweetly “Just a small glass, please.”

 _Small glass, pffffft._ It was a holiday. Didn’t she know holidays were for celebrating? He quickly trotted down to the kitchen and poured her a rather large glass of eggnog, then met her with it inside the drawing room. She was observing the Christmas tree as she fidgeted with the red box in her hand, smiling as the fairies left their branches and floated gracefully in circles around her head.

“Your eggnog, madame.” 

His phony French accent earned him a giggle, for which he beamed with praise. He liked to think of himself as funny. She accepted the glass, scoffing at the copious amount of eggnog he had poured her— though she didn’t seem upset, nor surprised Sirius had poured her so much.

“Are you trying to get me drunk, Sirius Black?” she asked playfully.

_Maybe._

“It’s the holidays,” he smiled mischievously “just trying to spread some cheer.”

She fought a smile as she rolled her eyes. “Here, this is for you.”

She handed him the small red box she had been fidgeting with. He grinned, then drew his wand and summoned a large, poorly wrapped parcel from under the Christmas tree. He caught it with ease under his free arm, praising himself for looking so suave while doing so.

“And this is for you,” He said, giving her the package “open mine first— sorry it looks spotty, I was never much of a gift wrapper...”

She smiled as she set her eggnog down, and then tore off the crinkled wrappings; her face lit up when the parcel was revealed to be a wireless radio.

“I noticed your family didn’t have one when I was sniffing around your house,” Sirius said, scratching the back of his head “I thought you might enjoy one.”

“I can’t believe you got me a wireless, I’ll have to hide this from Shannon— thank you,” Her smile quickly fell, her eyes landing upon the small box in Sirius’s hand. “My gift isn’t near as good…”

“Oh come off it!” he said with a teasing smile “quit your frowning.”

He opened the small box to reveal a small glass ornament. It was a figurine of a dog, much like the breed of his Animagus form, sparkling blue and silver in the lamp light as he turned it back and forth. It was beautiful; just looking at the figurine brought a swell of emotions to the surface. This gift was thought out, planned— this was possibly one of the most meaningful things anyone had ever given to him. He looked up at her; her cheeks were bright red as she shifted on her heels, not meeting his eyes.

“It reminded me of you,” She whispered.

“It’s perfect” he said breathlessly “I love it, it’s beautiful— fantastic”

“I know it’s not much…”

“Hush,” he said playfully “This is my favorite gift I’ve gotten. I love it.”

He was amazed at just how red her face could turn. He was about to pull her into a hug when he noticed a glint of gold around her wrist, distracting him.

“New bracelet?” he asked “It’s lovely.”

“A gift from Jack.” She said softly.

He felt superior to the devilishly handsome bartender in this moment. A wireless was certainly a better— and more functional— gift than a simple gold bangle.

“I won’t be around for New Year’s Eve,” she continued, frowning slightly. “He got us a ski trip in the Alps for the holiday as well…”

 _The Alps? He’s taking her to the fucking Alps?_ Any trace of superiority had vanished. He was taking her to the fucking _Alps._

“The Alps, eh?” He asked, hiding his irritation with a boyish, toothy smile. He raised a brow and gave her an appraising look “So things must be getting serious between you two, then?”

Color returned to her face as she bit her lip and shrugged. “We’re leaving in the morning— I just found out today.”

“Oh, well, save travels,” he said politely “I’m sure you’ll have a wonderful time.”

There was an awkward pause between them before Allie gestured to the doorway of the drawing room.

“I actually need to pack still, so I should…”

“Oh yes, you should get home to pack,” he said clumsily “Don’t let me keep you— enjoy yourself, safe travels.”

_You already said that, you idiot._

“Thank you,” she said with a gentle nod. “Merry Christmas, Sirius.”

She stepped to him and stood on her tip toes, placing a whisper soft kiss on his cheek. She flushed as she stepped away, and Sirius was certain he was just as tomato red as she was. He forced a smile, feeling as clumsy as a 13 year old boy as he spoke hoarsely.

“Merry Christmas, Allie” 

He waited until he heard her shut the front door behind her before letting out a frustrated groan. _The Alps._ He’s taking her to the fucking _Alps._ His self-loathing was nearly kicking him in the nuts. He had gotten her a stupid wireless radio, and Jack had matched and upped the ante with a goddamn ski trip. Could he be any flashier with his travel plans?

__

Sirius sunk down on the drawing room couch and took a sip Allie’s left behind eggnog; _not strong enough._ He flicked his wand and summoned a bottle of rum he had hidden inside the drawing room. He poured a few shots worth into the glass and took another sip; the liquor burned his throat, just like he liked. He sighed heavily and continued to sip on the viscous holiday drink, admiring the canine figurine with a heavy heart, wondering if Allie’s gift to Jack was as thoughtful as hers to him had been.

* * *

“Sirius? Uh—would you like to come down for supper? Mrs. Weasley said it was good luck to eat pork, sauerkraut…”

“No, Harry. I’m not hungry.”

Sirius had rung in the New Year with Buckbeak while Harry and the others had enjoyed a small party downstairs. His holiday cheer had disappeared as quickly as Christmas came and gone, so when New Year’s Eve came around, he was in no mood to celebrate.

What was there to look forward to in the New Year anyway? Here in just a few short days, the kids would be going back to school, and the house would be quiet again. With the holidays over, would the other members of the Order be so inclined to continue to drop by? It seemed like Kingsley, Tonks and Remus had dropped by regularly in the week or surrounding Christmas, which was more than they had in the last month, but after the holiday he hadn’t seen any of them. Outside of meetings, Allie was really the only one who came around 12 Grimmauld Place regularly, but even she wasn’t able to come around as often as Sirius had hoped, between her duties for the Order, her family, job, and Jack.

 _Jack._ Handsome, kind— and who seemed to be very well-off— _Jack._ Was she enjoying her ski trip with him in the Alps? Were they so busy on the ski slopes the entire time that they hardly had any interaction with each other?— Or did they spend most of their time held up in a snowy cabin, making love before a roaring fire? He shook off the thought; the last thing he wanted to imagine right now was her squirming underneath another bloke.

“Uh, Mrs. Weasley said I wasn’t to come back down without you…” Harry said nervously “Please, come down and at least tell her you’re not hungry?”

“Oh, that accursed woman…” Sirius growled as he flung the door open and scowled at Harry. “Is she in a rotten mood?”

“N—no,” Harry said, furrowing his brow and pushing his glasses up “Just very insistent that you have some of dinner for luck.”

“Unless she laced the meat with Felix Felicis, then her ‘luck’ just a load of centaur dung,” he grumbled “come on, let’s not keep her waiting…”

Remus and Tonks had joined them all for New Year’s dinner. Sirius ate his pork, sauerkraut and black eyed peas without protest, and without offering anything to the conversations going on around him. Remus eyed him periodically though out dinner, furrowing his brow every time he took a hearty swig of bourbon to wash down bites. Sirius was waiting for Remus to comment on his drinking— he even had a retort lined up and ready to go— but Remus never said anything. He kept his opinions to himself, only expressing disapproval through facial expressions. Tonks chattered all of their heads off about various subjects before doing her infamous metamorphing nose tricks— despite his sullen mood, Sirius couldn’t deny that a few of noses she shifted between gave him a good laugh.

The next few days seemed to float on by. Sirius wondered when Allie would return from her trip— or was she back already? She had simply just said she wouldn’t be around for New Year’s, but that was now days ago, and in his surprised to hear of her trip, he didn’t ask her when she was due to return. He hoped soon— the kids were going back to school in two days now, and he was immensely dreading the deafening quiet that would overtake the house.

It was only lunch time, but he had broken out a bottle of bourbon already, taking comfort in the burning sensation as he sipped the amber liquid. Molly was fixing lunch and giving him a periodic side-eye, but he didn’t care. Judgement over his drinking was easier dealt with if he were buzzed, anyway.

A flash of emerald green flames whooshed in the kitchen fireplace, and out stepped Severus Snape— the sight his hook nose and greasy black hair irritated Sirius for no good reason. It was more so just irritating that he existed, as James used to say.

“Hello, Severus,” Molly said politely, wiping her hands on her apron. “What can we do for you?”

“I need to speak with Potter,” Snape said, holding up a scroll of parchment. “I have a message from Dumbledore I need to relay to him—“ Snape turned his attention towards Sirius. “— _Alone._ ”

“Certainly, I’ll fetch him” said Molly.

She trotted up the basement kitchen stairs and out of sight. Once she was gone, Sirius turned his attention to the sallow skin wizard before him.

“I’m not comfortable with you talking to my godson alone,” Sirius said contemptuously “I’ll gladly stay in the room for this conversation, as a proper chaperone.”

“I have orders from Dumbledore,” Snape said, scowling. “Don’t you have better things to do with your time than eavesdrop on conversations you’re not welcome in? Oh, that’s right; you have plenty of time on your hands, don’t you?”

Sirius gritted his teeth, preparing a retort when Snape slapped a letter in front of him. He read through quickly, and then threw the letter back in front of him with a huff.

“Dumbledore wants you to teach Harry Occlumency,” He said stiffly. “He thinks Voldemort is able to see into his mind? And vice versa?”

Before Snape could answer him, Harry entered the kitchen, looking between him and Snape questioningly.

“Sit down, Potter” said Snape coolly

“You know,” Sirius interrupted loudly, leaning back on the rear legs of his chair as he stared at the ceiling “I think I’d prefer it if you didn’t give orders here, Snape. It’s my house, after all.”

Snape flushed irritably, ignoring Sirius “I was supposed to see you alone, Potter, but Black here—“

“I’m his godfather!” said Sirius, louder than ever.

“I’m here on Dumbledore’s orders,” Snape said softly “But by all means, Black, stay. I know you like to feel… _involved._ ”

It was Sirius’s turn to flush. He slammed his chair back down onto all fours, and remained silent, shooting daggers at Snape as he informed Harry that he would be studying Occlumency with him this term.

“Why can’t Dumbledore teach Harry?” Sirius grumbled “Why you?”

“I’m sure this is just the Headmaster delegating less than desirable tasks,” Snape sneered “Trust me, I did not beg for the job,” Snape got to his feet and turned to leave through the fireplace “I will expect you 6:00 on Monday evening, in my office.”

“Wait a moment!” Sirius snapped

“I am in a bit of a hurry, Black,” Snape sneered, turning back “Unlike you, I do not have unlimited leisure time.”

“I’ll be quick, then,” Sirius stood up and placed his palms on the table, leaning forward and narrowing his eyes at Snape. “If I hear you’re using these lessons to give Harry a hard time, you’ll have me to answer to.”

“How touching— but surely you’ve noticed that Potter is very much like his father?”

“Why, yes I have!” Sirius said proudly “He is very much like James.”

“Well, then you’ll know he’s so arrogant that criticism simply bounces right off of him.”

Sirius pulled out his wand and squared up to Snape, who mirrored this motion. Sirius began breathing heavily, adrenaline coursing through him at the hatred he felt for Severus Snape. How dare he, how dare he speak of James— or Harry— in that way.

“Sirius...” Harry said nervously.

Sirius ignored him, his eyes piercing into Snape’s with fury.

“I’ve warned you, _Snivellus,_ ” Sirius said, narrowing his eyes. “I don’t care if Dumbledore thinks you’re reformed— I know better.”

“Oh, then why don’t you tell him so? Or are you afraid he won’t take the advice of a man who’s been hiding inside his mother’s house for the last 6 months very seriously? A man who is afraid to leave his hidey-hole?”

“Are you calling me a coward?” Sirius snapped

“Why, yes— yes I am”

Sirius raised his wand; how he was going to enjoy hexing the shit out of this greasy haired, hooked nose…

“No, Stop!” Harry cried, jumping in between them.

“Harry, get back!” Sirius growled.

Harry didn’t budge. Sirius remained firmly planted in his spot with his wand raised, ready to shove his godson aside when the kitchen door opened, and in emerged the entire Weasley family and Hermione— Arthur included.

“Cured!” Arthur announced brightly “Completely cured!”

The group’s faces fell when they saw Snape and Sirius with wands pointed at each other’s throat and Harry in between the two men, holding them apart. Arthur stepped forward, exasperated.

“Merlin’s beard— what’s going on here?”

Snape pocketed his wand and made a swift exit back through the fireplace. Sirius pocked his wand and forced a smile.

“Nothing, Arthur— just a friendly little chat between two old school friends.” Sirius clasped his hands together “So you’re cured, how wonderful— really wonderful.”

Sirius passed by the group to exit the kitchen, but not without giving Arthur a firm handshake and patting him on the back. He made his way upstairs and into his bedroom, shutting the door before letting out a frustrated grunt. He began grabbing at objects on his book shelf and hurling them at the adjacent wall— a sneakoscope, a magnifying glass, a few books— whatever he could get his hands on. He picked up the sparkling dog figurine next, drawing his arm back but stopping in mid-stance. He instead brought the figurine in front of his face, admiring its beauty as the glass shifted from cobalt blue to shimmering silver in the dim lamplight. He frowned and sunk down onto the floor, leaning his back against the bookshelf. He was angry at the words Snape had spoken to him— he wasn’t a coward, was he? His orders from Dumbledore were to stay inside the house; he was just doing what was asked of him. Did the other members of the Order think him a coward for staying inside, not doing his part for guarding the unnamed item Voldemort sought after? Did _Allie_ think him a coward?

He clutched the canine figurine tightly in his hand, taking deep, steadying breaths. Didn’t Snape realize he would stick his neck out for the Order in a heartbeat? Did the others realize that? Maybe they did, maybe they didn’t— but in this moment, sulking alone on his bedroom floor, he had never felt more useless in his entire life.


	7. 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to being snowed in, I was able to get this chapter finished today!
> 
> Also, the small bit of smut in this chapter might lean more onto the explicit side... just fyi

After he had destroyed nearly half his bedroom and sulked in his piled of broken trinkets for an entire day, Sirius noticed something that may make him useful. A mirror that he had thrown and broken off a shard seemed to be reflecting his entire face as he looked upon it— in the mostly whole piece, as well as the shard. 

An idea struck him as he examined the two pieces. He was concerned about Harry not being able to communicate with him due to Umbridge’s tight security on Hogwarts, but what if he could use the shard of this mirror to alert Sirius if he needed something? Surely the mirror couldn’t be used for conversing back and forth, but if his godson gave any sign of need, he would floo, apparate to Hogsmeade or fly by broomstick to the castle. Hell, he would trot on up the marble stairs to the grand castle’s entrance as Snuffles if he had to. He would not sit back in his hidey-hole (as Snape had called it); he was not a coward. If his godson needed him, he would be there, no matter the risk to himself.

He wrapped the shard as best he could with thick wrapping parchment, and headed down the stairs. The children were gathering in the foyer with their pets and school trunks, ready to set out for Kings Cross.

“Harry,” Sirius said, clearing his throat slightly “A word?”

Harry excused himself from his conversation with Fred and George and stepped into the drawing room with Sirius.

“What’s up?” Harry asked, lowering his voice.

“I wanted to give you something before you went back to school,” Sirius said, handing him the badly wrapped shard of mirror “Don’t open it now— wait until you are alone in the dormitory, but use this if you need me for anything.”

“Alright,” Harry said slowly, examining the oddly shaped object “Thanks.”

Harry and Sirius reemerged into the foyer, where Molly was corralling all the children together. (“Alright, everyone have everything? Ginny— all packed? How about you, Ron?”) Sirius watched with a faint smile as Harry stored the shard in his trunk, and then turned back to him.

“I’ll see you… soon?” Harry said awkwardly.

“Yes, soon” Sirius pulled him into a hug, feeling a paternal sense of caring for Harry in this moment. “Give ‘em hell, kid. James and I certainly wouldn’t’ve laid down for an old bag like Umbridge.”

He watched with a heavy heart as the kids all filed out of the front door and out to the car. He hoped nothing bad would come to Harry, but he did hope that he would at least need something soon— even if it were just to say hello.

* * *

He heard the front door latch click shut as he sat over a bowl of oatmeal and a cup of tea. He drew his wand, but then pocketed it once he heard the familiar pitter-pattering footsteps coming down the basement stairs— _Allie._

She looked beautiful as ever; her cheeks were rosy, not from flush, but from the nipping January air outside. Her curls were bouncy, lively, springing with her soft footsteps.

“And she’s back,” Sirius said, watching her closely as she settled at the table next to him. She was carrying many neatly wrapped parcels of varying size and color; she set the boxes down in front of her, smiling bashfully at Sirius. “How was skiing off a large mountain?— tea?”

She nodded; He flicked his wand, magicking the tea kettle to pour her a piping hot mug of earl grey tea. The tea mug floated over and settled itself in front of Allie. She flushed; Sirius internally cheered for flawlessly executing his little display. _Yep, still got it. Sirius Black’s still got it._

“The mountains were lovely, thank you,” she smiled slightly as she slid a parcel to Sirius “A souvenir, for you— open it.”

He did so, unveiling a large snow globe depicting a small Swiss village with a vast mountain range behind. The base of the snow globe read **‘Zermatt, Switzerland.’** It was beautiful— he imagined the sight in person had been better. He looked up to see Allie squirming in her seat, turning even redder than she was.

“I thought if you were feeling closed in, looking at this might make you feel better. You could imagine you were in this village rather than here.”

He smiled toothily, about to thank her when the kitchen door burst open, and Remus came striding in. Way to ruin the moment, Moony. He was carrying a rolled up newspaper, his face etched with worry. His expression softened when he saw Allie sitting at the table as well.

“Oh, Allie— welcome back!” Remus said, taking a seat across from them “How was your trip?”

“Lovely, thank you,” She said, handing him one of her parcels “For you.”

He tore the wrappings off his parcel, revealing a set of Swiss chocolates, all with artisanal fillings and garnishes. “I do love my chocolate— thank you; this was very thoughtful of you.”

“You’re welcome.” She whispered, smiling.

“Well, I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but I’m going to assume neither of you have seen the paper?” Remus said, sighing heavily.

“No, not this morning,” Sirius said, furrowing his brow “What’s in the paper?”

Remus unrolled the newspaper he was carrying and slapped it onto the table. The front page of the Daily Prophet featured ten pictures of witches and wizards, all dressed in black and white striped robes, and the photographs labeled with Azkaban prison numbers. The headline was large, bold, and to the point.

****

**MASS BREAKOUT FROM AZKABAN.**

Allie’s face drained of all flush, turning white as a sheet at the sight of the newspaper’s headline.

“Fudge thinks it’s you rallying your old friends, Padfoot” said Remus.

Sirius yanked the newspaper off the table, his eyes darting back and forth as he read aloud.

_“The Ministry of Magic announced late last night that there has been a mass breakout from Azkaban. Speaking to reporters in his private office, Cornelius Fudge, Minister for Magic, confirmed that ten high-security prisoners escaped in the early hours of yesterday evening and that he has already informed the Muggle Prime Minister of the dangerous nature of these individuals.”_

Allie let out a small squeak, but Sirius kept on reading.

 _“’We find ourselves, most unfortunately, in the same position we were two and a half years ago when the murderer Sirius Black escaped,’ said Fudge last night. ‘Nor do we think the two breakouts are unrelated. An escape of this magnitude suggests outside help, and we must remember that Black, as the first person ever to break out of Azkaban, would be ideally placed to help others follow in his footsteps. We think it likely that these individuals, who include Black’s cousin, Bellatrix Lestrange, have rallied around Black as their leader—_ Oh, what a load of centaur shit!”

Sirius rolled his eyes and huffed irritably before finishing the paragraph.

 _“We are, however, doing all we can to round up the criminals, and we beg the magical community to remain alert and cautious. On no account should any of these individuals be approached.—_ Naturally Fudge would use me as an excuse, rather than admit that Voldemort is truly back!”

Sirius mumbled a few expletives as he slapped the Daily Prophet back down in front of them. Allie stared at the newspaper in silence, white faced and tight lipped. 

“Allie?” Remus asked slowly “Are you all right?”

“Oh,” she squeaked, jerking her head up. “Oh, uhm yes— I… I need to get to work. These are for the others— please see to it that they get them?”

She gestured to the few wrapped parcels she left on the table as she sprinted out of the kitchen. Sirius and Remus watched her curiously— something about her behavior after reading the newspaper was odd.

“What do you think that was about?” Remus asked “Think she was in the same cell block as any of the female escapees?”

“I’m not sure…” Sirius said, still staring at the kitchen door.

He realized she hadn’t talked much about her time in Azkaban after she was whisked away from his cell. He didn’t know what cell block she had been in, or which inmates she had run into. Maybe it was just simply the fact that the escapees were all Voldemort’s most loyal Death Eaters, and this escape would compromise things for the Order. He shrugged, and then reached over to snatch a chocolate out of Remus’s gift box.

“No, this is my artisanal chocolate!” Remus said childishly, pulling his box of Swiss chocolates away from Sirius.

“Don’t be a prat, Moony, give me some chocolate!”

* * *

He couldn’t sleep. He rolled over and looked at his clock— 10:47. He sighed; he had laid down at 9 simply out of boredom, but hadn’t been able to drift off to sleep.

The kids had been gone now for a couple days, and the house was quiet. He hadn’t seen a peep of Kreacher either, although the random creaks he had heard in the middle of the night suggested he may be roaming the attic. He hadn’t seen Allie since news of the mass breakout had hit the papers— why did she behave so oddly at the news? That was a few days ago; usually she would stop by headquarters at least every other day, even if only for a few minutes.

Boredom was nipping at Sirius, clawing its way from the inside out. He had been so thrilled to have company over the holidays that now, in the quiet, dusty house, the silence was deafening. He needed some entertainment, some fresh air. He hadn’t craved to get the hell out of the house this bad in a while. Maybe if he just took a quick stroll by the Leaky Cauldron, he would be able to see if she could sneak him a pint. Maybe she could sneak him into a room upstairs, and he’d stay all night, drinking and eating. At least it would be something different that sitting around this dank old house. 

He stood; he knew he shouldn’t be doing this, but he was going mad in here. Consequences rung in the back of his mind, knowing what would happen to him if he got caught, yet his legs took him down the stairs, and out the front door. It was dark out; he could blend in with his surroundings quite well at this time of night. He transformed into the shaggy black dog on the front step of the house, and then took off trotting down the sidewalk, making his way toward Diagon Alley.

Diagon alley was not very busy, as it was a night though the week and most witches and wizards would most likely be in bed at this hour. He trotted a few paces behind a couple wizards who already seemed drunk, making their way to the Leaky Cauldron. Sirius slipped in the door after them, taking in the sight of the half-filled pub with people noisily eating and drinking. He wished he could transform back into a human, kick back with a beer and enjoy himself. Alas, he would need to remain in his canine form— he had passed three separate wanted posters with his face brandished across them on his journey here. He was the most infamous murderer in the wizarding world— ironic, as he had never killed anybody before.

He sat, scanning the bar; He recognized the bartender as Jack, looking handsomer than Sirius remembered him. The sight of his chiseled jaw line irritated him; did he really need to be so goddamn good looking? 

After a moment of watching Jack contemptuously, he saw Allie emerge from the kitchen with a tray of soup bowls, her fire-y curls bouncing as she walked over to a table to deliver the food. Her apron cinched her small waist, putting emphasis on her hourglass figure. Merlin, she was _lovely._

He trotted over to the edge of the bar, hoping to catch Allie’s attention next time she walked by.

“Well hey there, fella” Jack said, stepping around to look at Sirius “How’d you get in here?”

Sirius instantly regretted his decision to come out tonight— he was hoping Allie would’ve been the only one to have noticed him.

“Allie!” Jack called, waving Allie over. She obliged, but once she saw Sirius, the color drained from her face. “Isn’t this the stray you had found months ago? He looks familiar…”

Allie opened and closed her mouth a few times, looking at Sirius bewildered before speaking “Uhm, no— I don’t think so…”

“Ah, I thought it might be that same dog. I don’t know how he got in here, but we can’t have a dog inside the pub, both Tom and your mum would flip.”

Sirius recognized the name Tom— back when he, James, Remus and Peter used to come to the Leaky Cauldron for beers regularly, Tom had been the bartender always on staff. He partly wished the old wizard would’ve been working tonight; it would’ve been a blast from the past. 

“I’ll take him out the back, send him on his way,” She said softly, “Come here, boy— follow me.”

Sirius trotted after her, through the kitchen and out to a very small, smelly, secluded area behind the Leaky Cauldron’s dumpster. Once they were alone, Allie turned to him, scowling.

“What are you doing here?” she said harshly, just above a whisper.

Sirius transformed back into himself, scratching the back of his head sheepishly “Oh, you know, just out stretching my legs…”

“Stretching your legs?” She said incredulously “You need to go home.”

“Oh come on, where’s your sense of adventure?”

Sirius flashed a mischievous smile. Allie looked unamused. He frowned, letting out a huff “I got bored, and I couldn’t sleep…”

“Please go home,” She pleaded quietly “Please, Sirius, if someone sees you—“ she stopped, taking a shaking breath “Please—“

“Allie? You still out here?”

It was Jack, calling from the restaurant’s back door.

“Quick!” Allie hissed barely above a whisper “transform!”

Sirius was a dog again at the blink of an eye. Jack stepped around the dumpster, looking at her earnestly.

“Its cold out here— everything ok?” He looked down at Sirius, raising a brow “You know, I could _swear_ this was the same dog…”

“It’s not,” Allie said quickly “Yes, I’m fine— back inside?”

Jack kissed her forehead and wrapped his arm around her waist as he led her back inside. As she was stepping though the doorway, she snuck a glance back at Sirius ever so quickly before stepping back inside.

Sirius let out a low, irritated growl as he turned and began trotting away, back in the direction of 12 Grimmauld place.

* * *

He had hardly slept a wink before the sun came through the window on his bedroom, informing him of daybreak. He was unable to get Allie out of his mind, the thought of her and their brief conversation replaying in his head. He lay in bed wondering if she stayed with Jack last night, allowing him to provide her with stress relief and relaxation before she curled up in his arms to sleep. Did she stay with him often? Did she enjoy Jack’s touch as much as she had enjoyed his those few years ago?

His morning wood would not go away. His cock grew harder and harder the more he thought of her, wondering if she tasted as sweet as he imagined. He wanted to kiss her from her breasts down to her mound, and flick his tongue over her little nub to elicit soft whimpers from her until she came apart for him.

His cock ached; he needed relief. He hadn’t touched a woman since Allie, his two year stint of celibacy seemingly more difficult this morning than the 12 year previous. He hopped out of bed and slipped into the bathroom, turning the shower on full heat. The hot water turned his skin pink, but he didn’t mind. He had partially hoped the water would soothe his erection, but alas, it did not. His cock strained to be touched, strained for release. 

He took a glob of conditioner in his palm and wrapped a hand around himself. He began to stroke, imagining that instead of his own large grip that it was her small, delicate palm stroking him gently, antagonizing him. A soft moan escaped him as he leaned against the shower wall, now imagining parting her rosy lips with his head, then sinking into her tight, wet cunt.

_“Allie.”_

He growled just above a whisper. He pumped his hand harder, faster, wishing to have a fistful of that wild, curly hair as he pounded her from behind. He craved to hear her sweet whimpers, to hear her chanting his name so whisper soft as he fucked her.

_Sirius...Sirius...Sirius..._

His balls tightened, he released onto the shower floor with a guttural groan. He finished his mental fantasy by imaging Allie’s gentle touch running up his chest as she peppered his skin with quick kisses. What he wouldn’t do to have that right here, right now. He craved an intimate touch, to hold her and to be held by her; to run his hands through her thick, voluminous curls as she listened to his heartbeat and drew patterns on his chest.

Was she listening to Jack’s heartbeat right now? Was she running her gentle hands up Jack’s chest right now? Was she peppering his skin with her sweet kisses, chanting his name in his ear as he made love to her, _right now?_

The thought made his blood boil. He didn’t want handsome Jack touching her, pleasuring her. He remembered his handsome, smug face when he wrapped his arm around her to lead her back inside, as if she were his. _She is his, you git. She’s his girlfriend, not yours._

He grabbed a bar of soap and began rubbing it all over, vigorously scrubbing and taking his irritation out on his skin. After he scrubbed himself raw in the shower, he dressed in a pair of faded jeans and an old t-shirt, and made his way to the kitchen for a much needed glass of scotch. Sure, it was early, but what the hell else was he supposed to do with his day? 

He walked into the kitchen, jumping slightly at Allie sitting at the kitchen table alone, her arms folded on the table in front of her.

“You could’ve been seen last night.” She said softly

“Well hello to you too.” Sirius said contemptuously. _“Good morning, Sirius, how are you? Oh, I’m just peachy, kitten, how are you?...”_ he added mockingly.

“What were you thinking?—!” she hissed, interrupting his sardonic monologue “What if you had been caught? Do you _want_ to go back to Azkaban?”

“No different than being here,” he shrugged

“Yes it is, you know very well it’s different.” she whispered, her tone laced with venom and frustration. 

He poured himself a glass of scotch; why was he being so cold to her? He had just jerked himself over thinking of her not fifteen minutes before. Was it because he was certain Jack had his hands all over her this morning before she had arrived here? Was it because she came here to scold him like a child for leaving the house? They were silent for a moment before she spoke again.

“I have something for you— and _not_ because you snuck out last night— I was going to give this to you anyway.”

“What’s that?” he asked curiously, turning back to look at her.

She held up a small plastic bag with a few hairs inside, and a small vial of a thick looking potion. “A few strands of Jack’s hair, and enough polyjuice for one hour— I thought you might fancy a walk.”

Sirius grinned, wide and toothy. His brooding demeanor instantly flipped, feeling a twinge of excitement in his core. He set his scotch down and clapped his hands together.

“Now _that_ is what I’m talking about!”


	8. 8

His stomach stirred, his skin bubbled— he watched in the small, dingy mirror that hung on the wall next to the pantry as his features shifted from his to Jack’s. He grew three inches in height, his shoulders and jaw shifted to appear squarer, and his hair shortened significantly. He reached up and touched his face, then looked down at his hands.

“Wicked,” Sirius said with a slight chuckle. “I even sound like the bloke.”

“Come on,” Allie giggled, placing a delicate hand on his shoulder “We’re on borrowed time.”

They pulled on thick traveling cloaks and stepped outside onto the front stoop; the air was biting cold— not a pleasurable temperature for a leisurely walk, but he wasn’t going to complain. Allie took his hand and initiated apparition. After having all the air squeezed out of him, Sirius felt his feet hit the cobblestone road of Diagon Alley.

“We need to stay away from the Leaky Cauldron;” Allie said softly, “Jack is working today.”

“I take it you didn’t tell him you plucked a few of his hairs so you could take an alleged mass murderer for a walk?” Sirius asked with a wry smile.

Allie flushed scarlet, but kept moving, leading him further into the heart of Diagon Alley.

“Where’d you get the polyjuice?” he asked, “you don’t seem like the type to keep such potions in your cabinet.”

She smiled bashfully “Moody.”

“And I take it he also doesn’t know you siphoned off a bit from his stash?”

Sirius didn’t think Allie could turn any redder; however, she flushed even harder. She shrugged, chewing on the bottom of her lip and fighting a wider smile.

“Would you like Florean Fortescue’s?” She asked “Oddly, I crave ice cream when it’s cold out.”

“I haven’t had Florean Fortescue’s in…” Sirius stopped. _14 years._ Really, he hadn’t done much of _anything_ in 14 years. It sounded sadder in his head today than it normally did. Surely he was aware he spent 14 years behind bars, but standing here in the middle of Diagon Alley with the wind whipping a face not of his own, all of what he’d been missing hit him at once.

“Sirius,” Allie whispered, her gentle hand snaking up his arm to his shoulder. “You alright?”

“Yeah, kitten, I’m fine,” he said, forcing a smile “Yes, let’s get some ice cream.”

Treacle Toffee, Butterscotch, Clotted Cream, Chocolate chili— so many flavors, how was one supposed to choose just one? Sirius sampled each and every flavor Mr. Fortescue had, and then again when he still couldn’t decide.

“Which one are you getting, kitten?” Sirius asked, his eyes wide with excitement, like a child experiencing dessert for the first time. “I can’t choose.”

“Earl Grey and Lavender,” she said with a giggle “It’s my favorite.”

“Alright alright, I’ll have the same.”

They walked up and down the street, shivering and eating their ice cream as witches and wizards gave them strange looks. Sirius didn’t care, let them stare; for the next forty-five minutes, he was a free man— free to eat his ice cream outside in the frigid cold if he so damn pleased.

“So, you seemed a little upset the other day,” Sirius started, casually “at the news of the mass breakouts from Azkaban.”

“Oh—“Allie flushed “I, uhm—“

“Allison? Merlin, you and your ice cream habits— it’s freezing out here...”

Allie gasped as she and Sirius spun around. Colleen Murphy, Allie’s mother, was standing by them holding a few bags from Madam Malkin’s.

“Jack, lovely to see you— I thought I had scheduled you to work today…?”

“Lunch break.” Sirius said immediately. His palms started sweating; hopefully Colleen wouldn’t ask him anything that would make him blow his cover.

“Mum, I thought you had today off?” Allie asked, her cheeks flushing.

“Yes, I do, but Rory sent an owl that his school trousers are already too short,” Colleen sighed heavily “I picked him up another few pairs from Madam Malkin’s— 3 galleons! Her prices are outrageous…”

“Are you stopping by work while you’re here?” Allie asked nervously.

“No, I’m staying far away from the Leaky Cauldron today— it’s my day off and I know if I go anywhere near that place, I will start doing work,” Colleen said, waving her hands as she spoke “I’ll let you two get back to your ice cream— Jack, you must come by for dinner Saturday night, I’m making pot roast.”

His heart pounded; “I wouldn’t miss it.” Sirius said, praising himself for keeping his voice straight.

Once Colleen was out of ear shot, Allie let out a deep exhale.

“That was…”

“Terrifying, but kind of fun,” Sirius laughed uneasily “come on— I want to hit the joke shop.”

Gambol and Japes joke shop wasn’t ever as good as Zonko’s in Hogsmeade, but at least had some interesting products. He spent their time in the shop showing Allie all his old favorite items that he would prank Remus, Peter and James with during their days as students. Her giggles in response to his stories fed his ego tremendously— he felt like the charismatic 21-year-old version of himself, before his friends were betrayed and slain, before he were sentenced to life in prison without a proper trial.

He wasn’t sure if it were the sheer fact that he was outside the dingy walls of 12 Grimmauld place, but the world was different than he ever remembered it being when he was with Allie. When he thought about it, he might’ve experienced similar feelings when she was around, but today he noticed a difference more than he ever had. The air felt lighter, colors seemed more vibrant when she was around, and something about the way she would look into his eyes or gently brush against him made his stomach somersault. He felt more alive in her presence than he had in a very _very_ long time.

“Sirius, we need to get back—“ she said suddenly, looking at her watch “I lost track of time, we’ve only got a couple minutes.”

Now that she mentioned it, his skin did feel a little tingly. He looked down at his hands and saw the skin on the back of his hands start to bubble, as it had just moments after he drank the potion. He grabbed her and pulled her into a shadowy space between two shops, this time he initiating the apparition. When their feet hit the sidewalk in front of 12 Grimmauld place, Allie let out a strained hiss. Material from her traveling cloak as well as the first few layers of skin off her shoulder were missing. His heart dropped to his feet.

“Oh shit… I— I splinched you— _damn it!_ I spinched—“

“I’m fine!” she said quickly. “Inside, quickly!”

They bustled inside, Sirius immediately removing her travelling cloak and examined her shoulder. It looked to be indeed just skin that was splinched, albeit her shoulder now was red and raw, but it could’ve been much _much_ worse.

“Does it hurt?” he asked breathlessly.

“A little” she whispered.

“Shit, Allie, I am so sorry—“guilt was nipping at him; he couldn’t believe he actually splinched her. He’d never even splinched himself. “I think I have some dittany in the kitchen cupboard.”

They descended into the basement kitchen, Sirius throwing open the cupboards in a mad dash for a vial of dittany. He found an almost empty vial, but it looked to be enough to heal her shoulder.

“This might sting.” he said 

The wound sizzled the moment the liquid hit her skin. She let out a squeak of pain; Sirius muttered apologies over and over, feeling terrible for being the one to have hurt her. New, fresh skin stretched and grew across the raw patch, however still pink, and needing to heal over time.

“You look like you again.” she said weakly

“I hope that doesn’t disappoint.” He chuckled softly

“Never.”

She had whispered so softly Sirius wasn’t sure if she had actually said anything or not. He tossed the empty vial into the nearby waste basket, and then turned back to her.

“How about a nice cup of tea to warm us? I don’t know about you, but I’m half frozen.”

She nodded, mustering up a smile.

“Please.”

* * *

“Broderick Bode was killed, by a clipping of Devil’s Snare,” Arthur said “It had to be a Death Eater who smuggled it in— from what I’ve heard, he’s showed signs of being placed under the imperius curse.”

“So it sounds like the Death Eaters are doing just about anything they can to get inside the Department of Mysteries.” Tonks said

“Constant vigilance,” Moody growled “they are getting antsier to get the weapon—“

Breakfast ended up turning into an Order meeting, which Sirius didn’t mind. He liked having the meetings here at the house, it made him feel involved. He immediately cursed himself as that thought went through his head— Snape had been right that day, he did indeed like to feel involved.

Much more than news about the death of Unspeakable Broderick Bode, there wasn’t much news to report. The rest of the meeting was mostly confirming patrol schedules; Molly had made a fit about someone switching Arthur his patrol for the evening, as it was Valentine’s Day and she ‘something’ planned. Sirius was glad she didn’t allude to exactly what this ‘something’ was, but by the way Arthur’s face flushed, he knew exactly what she had meant.

“I’ll switch you, Arthur;” Tonks piped up “It’s not like I have any plans for this evening.”

Sirius couldn’t help but notice a slight glance she shot Remus across the table, as well as a complete avoidance of her eyes from him. He thought this curious for a split second, until a photograph forced into his hand broke his attention.

“Look, Sirius— remember taking this photograph?” Emmaline Vance said, pointing to a group of people in front of a large Christmas tree. “Christmas 1980, if I am remembering correctly…”

Sirius studied the faces in the photograph; indeed, he believed Emmaline was correct in the date. He smiled at the faces of Benjy Fenwick, Caradoc Dearborn and Edgar Bones— three blokes he missed tremendously. Dumbledore was dressed in brilliant Christmas green robes, his eyes twinkling out through the photograph as if he was standing before him. Remus was in the back of the photograph, nearly a whole head taller than the rest of the group. Sirius found his 21 year-old self, standing next to James and Lily, smiling easily at the camera. His stomach rolled at the sight of Peter standing next to Lily— traitor. He felt the strong desire to scratch the filth’s face out of the photo with a butter knife, but refrained. 

“Here kitten, get a load of this—“ Sirius said, handing Allie the photograph “Before Remus went gray.”

“Thanks Padfoot,” Remus said sarcastically, self-consciously running a hand through his silver-streaked hair.

“It makes you look distinguished, Remus,” Tonks said with an easy smile. “Ignore him.”

Sirius watched as Allie studied the photograph curiously. After a minute, the corners of her mouth curled up, and she began giggling under her breath.

“What’s got you in a fit?” Sirius asked curiously.

“I’m just wondering what happened…” Allie said softly, stifling more giggles.

“What do you mean?”

The widest, wriest smile spread across her face as she looked up at him “You used to be so handsome— what happened?”

It took Sirius a few seconds to register what she had said. Him as well as half the table burst out laughing.

_“Damn!”_ Tonks cried through laughter “Mute Murphy’s got jokes!”

“That’s not true!” Sirius protested playfully “You know I am still just as handsome— admit it!”

Allie flushed red through her laughter, giving him a slight nod. Sirius grinned wide.

“That’s right,” Sirius said, smirking and winking at her overtop of his coffee mug “Don’t you forget it.”

“So, Allie—“ Tonks asked as the table’s laughter died down “what are your Valentine ’s Day plans?” She leaned forward, raising an eyebrow “a hot date with that strapping boyfriend of yours?”

Sirius’s mood was squashed at the mention of Jack. He cleared his throat and shifted, attempting to hide his jealousy. “You’ve met Jack?” he asked.

“Yeah, I frequent the Leaky Cauldron,” Tonks said “He makes the best Bloody Mary.”

“Yeah, kitten, what are your Valentine’s plans this evening?” he asked, attempting to sound casual, but his sentence came out awkward, clumsy.

Allie flushed deeply “Oh— we just have dinner reservations.” She said softly.

“Where at? Somewhere fancy?” Tonks pressed.

“The Pearl.” She replied, just above a whisper.

“The Pearl? That fancy muggle seafood place?” Tonks leaned back, grinning wide “Damn, that bloke must really like you to spend that kind of money on dinner.”

Sirius seethed on the inside. “The Pearl? Is that a new joint?”

“It opened a couple years ago— very fancy, very uppity; known for their oysters.” Tonks said “So, tell me how a bartender affords dinner at The Pearl?”

“His grandfather helped invent the Cleansweeps 3 and 4,” she said, flushing even deeper. “He has an inheritance.”

Sirius tuned out the rest of the conversation; he didn’t need to hear any more. He turned his attention to Mundungus, speaking to Emmaline Vance over some silver tea kettles he ‘found’ the previous week. He didn’t particularly care about whatever Mundungus had pilfered this time, but at least if he seemed interested in the tea kettles, it would drown out the chatter of expensive oysters and fine champagne.

“Now, Dung—“ Sirius interjected “Where exactly did you acquire these fancy kettles?”

* * *

Remus and bottle of Ogden’s Old firewhisky had been Sirius’s valentines that evening. He and Remus drank nearly the whole bottle in the drawing room; Sirius drinking to ignore visions of Jack and Allie slurping oysters and eating chocolate covered strawberries, and Remus drinking to ignore something he wouldn’t share, but based on his expression, something had been getting him down. Both men had crawled off to their beds very early that night, Sirius passing out the moment his head hit the pillow.

A knock at the door made Sirius wake abruptly. He rubbed his eyes and looked over at the clock; 11:45. He grumbled swear words under his breath irritably as he rolled out of bed and stomped over to the door.

“I swear, Moony, someone better be dying—” He opened the door just a crack, sticking his head into the hallway. He was caught off guard when it was not the lanky werewolf standing in the middle of the dim hallway, but Allie instead. “—Allie?”

“I’m sorry; I know it’s late...” 

“No, it’s alright, kitten” He rasped “come in”

He was suddenly self-conscious of standing before her shirtless and in raggedy sweatpants, for she looked absolutely radiant. Her sage green dress floated over her figure gracefully, her wild hair was knotted back in a neat chignon. Sirius lit the oil lamps with a flick of his wand; the soft glow of flames illuminating her face with a golden cast. He watched as she began to wander around the room, observing the various posters of bikini clad women posing with motorbikes and muscle cars.

“Everything alright?” he asked slowly

“Mhmm” she hummed

“Didn’t you have dinner with Jack tonight? At that fancy seafood place?”

“I did.” 

Her sweet voice was whisper soft and barely audible. He shifted his weight as he ran his fingers through his tangled, wavy hair. They stood in silence for a few minutes as Sirius watched Allie pace around his room, running her fingers along his dressers and bookshelves as she observed his collection of trinkets. She was studying his room as if she was in a museum, glancing at ancient artifacts. There seemed to be something on her mind; it was odd that she would show up at this time of night just to observe his belongings.

“You look so— so lovely, this evening.” He said clumsily.

_Smooth, Casanova…_

She turned to him, her vibrant green eyes flickering at him with odd curiosity. She stepped over to him and placed her hands gingerly on his bare chest, standing on her tiptoes and pressing her lips to his. 

_Fireworks!_

His senses were stimulated with every aspect of her; her lip balm tasted like vanilla, her perfume smelled like fresh violet florals and jasmine. His hands found her waist, his mind raced as they kissed— he wanted nothing more than to lay her down on his bed and kiss every inch of her beautifully freckled flesh, but— but…

“Allie—“ he broke the kiss suddenly “what is—?”

“Jack asked me to marry him” she whispered, interrupting.

“Oh—“ Sirius stepped back and grasped his hair, his brow furrowing in confusion “what did you say?”

“I didn’t give him an answer yet...”

Sirius blinked at her vacantly. “You didn’t say yes…?” he asked slowly

She opened and closed her mouth a couple time before flushing her signature tomato red. “…Should I have?” 

Sirius didn’t quite understand what she was getting at. He didn’t understand why she hadn’t given him an answer, or why she had come here instead of giving him an answer. In his mind, it was a simple question that required a simple yes or no answer.

After a moment of him staring, she shrunk away from him, wrapping herself in her arms and looking down at her feet.

“I shouldn’t have come, I’m sorry—“

She turned and bolted, and bustling through the door quicker than Sirius had ever seen her move.

“Allie!”

He chased her down the hall, she scrambling fast down the stairs, blowing past all the groaning and jeering portraits. He didn’t mean to upset her, and he certainly did not want her to go.

“Allie, wait!” He shouted

_“FILTH! VIAL HUMANS AND BLOOD TRAITORS!”_

The portrait of Mrs. Black screamed at top volume as Sirius bumbled after Allie. Remus emerged from his bedroom, looking startled out of a deep sleep as he followed Sirius down the few flights of stairs.

“Allie stop— _please!”_

Allie flung the front door open, running out onto the lawn as Sirius reached the front door way.

“ALLIE!”

She disapparated with a loud crack, leaving Sirius staring dumbfounded at the spot that she had disappeared from.

_“HALF-BREEDS, MUDBLOODS!”_

Sirius turned back to see Remus watching him— staring at him sympathetically.

“What the hell you looking at?” He growled irritably.

He stormed back inside, pushing past Remus. Rather than shut up his mother’s portrait, he cast a crude gesture at the screaming woman as he passed by. He slammed the door shut when he reached his bedroom, collapsing onto his bed as he wracked his brain over what the hell had just happened.

* * *

“But I don’t understand why she came by and kissed me right after the bloke asked for her hand! Or why she got upset when I just simply asked why she didn’t say yes?”

Tonks had stopped by that morning on her way home from patrolling, having breakfast with Remus and Sirius. Sirius was exasperated as he relayed the events of him and Allie’s conversation before their outburst. Tonks was seated across from him and Remus, her rolling eyes and scoffing in perfect view to him.

“Are you daft?” She scoffed “You are an idiot if you don’t understand what she was doing.”

“What’re you going on about?” Sirius snarled.

Tonks looked at him sternly. “She came by to see you instead of giving Jack an answer”

“I know that!” he snapped “that’s why I’m confused!”

“Do I really need to spell it out for you?” she asked incredulously “She wanted you to give her a reason not to marry him”

Sirius’s face puzzled “What makes you think that? Why would I need to give her a reason not to marry him? If she doesn’t want to, all she has to do is say no.”

“Because Jack is a nice bloke who can provide and take care of her” Tonks explained “Marrying him would be a good thing for her— unless you gave her reason not to.”

“I still don’t understand.”

“She’s in love with you, you idiot!!!” Tonks snarled “God, you men are so goddamn thick!! Bunch of circus baboons!” 

She shot Sirius, then Remus a dirty look as she marched up and out of the kitchen.

“Moony, do you think she really is in love with me?”

Remus stared at the spot Tonks had exited from, seeming to not be paying attention to Sirius. After a moment though, “I notice the way she looks at you— I think she coming here last night confirms she does.”

Sirius took a moment to ponder this revelation. He should be excited at this news, but a thought weighed heavily on his conscious. “I— I can’t give her what Jack can; I’m a fugitive, a prisoner of this house. He has freedom, a job, the ability to give her what she deserves”

“Do you love her?” Remus asked.

Sirius had never been in love before, but unequivocally he knew the answer to Remus’s question.

“Yes.”

Remus nodded silently, seeming to process the thought before speaking. “Then let her go. Let her marry him.”

“But I don’t want her to marry him,” Sirius answered truthfully “I want her to be happy, but I want her to be happy with me, not him.

“You said it just a moment ago, you can’t provide what she needs like Jack will be able to,” Remus said “If you love her Padfoot, you cannot be selfish. You need to do what is best for her, in this case, that’s letting her go. If you love her, let her marry him.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Remus gives terrible love advice LOL
> 
> Poor Sirius- he'll get it together here soon, I promise!!


	9. 9

Sirius couldn’t take his eyes off her hands clasped around her tea mug. Her nails were perfectly manicured and polished a pearlescent maroon, showcasing the glinting diamond on her left ring finger. She didn’t boast about the ring, but didn’t attempt to hide it either. If any of the members of the Order would ask to see it, she would politely show them, blushing as they complimented the ivy detailing carved into the gold band, or the size and brilliance of her diamond. It was a beautiful ring, he couldn’t deny it, but not as beautiful as the woman it was attached to, he thought.

She was cordial to him; she didn’t avoid his eyes or pretend he wasn’t in the room, but she didn’t seek out his company after the Order meetings would disband. Whenever they would catch each other’s gaze she would still smile, but there was a certain sadness behind her eyes that made Sirius’s heart clench.

He wanted happiness for her, even if he were never going to experience it for himself. His stomach lurched every time he caught a glimpse of the glint of her diamond ring, or heard one of the members of the Order bring up the impending nuptials. Even 6 weeks after she accepted Jack’s proposal, Remus’s advice still rang inside his head every time he thought of her.

_If you love her, let her go._

He had convinced himself he wasn’t worthy of the life and family he had always wished for— people like him didn’t get a happy ending. He was destined to rot out the remainder of his days as a useless waste of space inside 12 Grimmauld Place. He was tied to this house just as Kreacher and his predecessors had been, unable to leave without directly defying orders— at this point, they might as well mount his head on the wall after he bit the dust.

He found himself spending most of his time in the drawing room drinking straight from a bottle of rum, wallowing in his own self-pity. He sat on the old moth eaten couch, hair knotted and face unshaven, staring at a copy of the Daily Prophet from over a month ago. On the back page of the newspaper was a small blurb in the bottom right-hand corner.

**Engagement Announcements**

There were four couples announcing their engagements inside this issue of the Daily Prophet, but only one paragraph stood out to Sirius.

_Jack Wallingford, grandson of famous broomstick engineer Harold Wallingford, is scheduled to wed Allison Murphy at the beginning of April. The two will enjoy private nuptials in London, and then honeymoon in the countryside of France. The couple met at the Leaky Cauldron in Diagon Alley, where they are both currently employed._

He scoffed at the paper as if he were reading it for the first time. He however, had read the back page of this particular issue many times over since its release. _Countryside of France, what a fucking showoff. He’s just flaunting his wealth._

 “You just going to sit in here and drink yourself to death?”

Tonks stood in the doorway of the drawing room, hair a magnificent shade of electric green, smirking. Sirius crumpled up the paper and shoved it between the couch cushions hastily.

“Good afternoon to you too,” he said sardonically.

Tonks stepped inside the room, plopping down on the couch next to him. She stared at him for a moment, making Sirius extremely uncomfortable.

_“What?”_ he snapped

She raised a brow, pursing her lips ever so slightly. In this moment, Sirius was reminded of her mother Andromeda— Sirius’s favorite cousin. Andromeda wasn’t like her sisters Bellatrix and Narcissa— she actually had a good head on her shoulders. She was on the right side of things.

“May I speak frank?”

“Sure—” Sirius took another swig, the rum burning his throat and causing him to speak with a strained voice “—not that lack of permission stops you from speaking, anyhow.”

Tonks simply shook her head and rolled her eyes. “You need to get your head out of your arse,” she said “What’s got you so down?”

“Oh, I don’t know— maybe the fact that I’m doomed to rot in this dreadful excuse of a home for the rest of my days,” Sirius grumbled “Other than that, I’m just peachy.”

“So, this wallowing in self-pity bit you have going on has nothing to do with Allie getting married next week?”

Sirius sighed, and didn’t answer her. _It’s got everything to do with that._

“If you don’t want her to marry him, why don’t you speak up?”

Sirius took a moment to answer, picking at a frayed thread at the bottom hem of his shirt. When he did, he spoke quietly, just above a whisper. “Because I love her— and because I love her, I need to let her go.”

Tonks blinked at him a few times, and then burst out in laughter. “That’s the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard! Why would you need to let her go if you love her? That makes no sense.”

“Jack is better for her than me,” Sirius explained, taking another hearty swig of rum. “He’s not stuck inside; he can give her a life that I’m not sure I can ever give her.”

“Where’d you get this idea from? Remus? Is he putting dumb thoughts into your head?” Tonks all of a sudden looked angry “I swear, I’ve never met a man who hates himself more than Remus Lupin, a goddamn idiot sometimes…”

“He’s not wrong.”

“He _is_ wrong,” Tonks corrected “Yes, marrying Jack would be good for her. They’ll have a lovely little life— have a nice house in the countryside, pop out a few kids, never want for money. Her family will never go hungry and she’ll never have to steal money from a cash register to feed her siblings. They’ll care for each other, and it’ll be nice.”

“Sounds lovely.” Sirius said flatly.

“But she’s missing something in that story. She’s missing the intense, weak at the knees, completely enthralled, so sick love that she has for you. I know she loves Jack, she wouldn’t’ve accepted his proposal if she didn’t, but she is _in_ love with you. _You_ are the one who makes her weak at the knees.”

“And she told you this? Mute Murphy, who barely speaks more than a sentence to anyone— well, except—“

“Except _you_.” Tonks said, now smiling slightly “Haven’t you noticed she’s a real chatterbox around you? I pried a couple things out of her when she had some tea with me after her shift at the Cauldron, but I filled in the blanks by myself.”

Sirius fidgeted with his bottle, digesting everything Tonks was saying.

“She could be your happy ending, Sirius.”

“People like me don’t get a happy ending.”

“But _why,”_ she asked “Why is it that you think you can’t be happy?”

Sirius opened and closed his mouth a couple times before answering. He didn’t know why, he had just assumed it wasn’t in the cards. It’s what he had been telling himself every day for the last 6 weeks.

“It’s not in the cards for me; I just don’t get a happy ending.”

“Only if you don’t allow yourself to have one!” Tonks snapped “Get Remus out of your head and quit being a goddamn coward!”

Anger seethed through him— he was even angrier to hear the word _coward_ come out of Tonks’s mouth than he was Snape’s. “Don’t you dare call me that!” he hissed “I am no coward.”

“Then don’t act like one.” Tonks said frankly, standing up and smoothing the front of her robes “Think about what I said— by the way, Molly wanted me to ask if you she could throw Allie a little engagement party tomorrow. I’ll tell her you’d be delighted.”

She turned and glided out of the drawing room shutting the door behind her. Sirius downed a large swig of rum, and then another. He wasn’t sure what to make of Tonks’s words or the idea of playing host a party celebrating the impending wedding, but if he were to be drunk tonight, he wouldn’t have to make something of them.

* * *

Molly seemed to be resting at nothing to make Allie’s engagement party a grand spectacle. She’d been in the kitchen all day preparing appetizers, enlisting Sirius in projects he wanted no part of. He begrudgingly tacked up a large banner to the kitchen wall reading ‘ _Best Wishes, Allie and Jack’._ It was hard to think that their 6 week engagement was nearing its end, and this time next week, she would become Mrs. Jack Wallingford.

6 weeks—a rather short engagement, in Sirius’s mind; as much as he questioned why they were moving so fast, he figured there was probably no reason to drag it out. Had it been him that got down on one knee and asked for Allie’s hand, he wouldn’t’ve wanted to wait even 6 weeks to make her Mrs. Sirius Black. He scoffed at himself silently for even entertaining the thought of a wedding— a wedding meant a happy ending, something not meant for him.

But _why?_ Tonks question forced its way into his brain, and wouldn’t rest. Why was he the one destined to be miserable his entire life? What bad karma did he create in his life to have deserved all the bullshit he’d endured?

Sure, he’d been a bit of a tosser back in his school days. Wasn’t the kindest to blokes he didn’t like, broke some hearts of some ladies after romps in the second floor girl’s bathroom. He was a just a boy then. Certainly a few harmless heckles or one night stands would’ve made his deserving of a 12 year prison sentence for murder he didn’t commit, only then  to rot out the rest of his days inside his parent’s home.

Allie’s face flashed through his mind; what he wouldn’t give for the banner to read _‘Best Wishes Allie and Sirius.’_ What he wouldn’t give to stand before her, admiring her in a beautiful white lace dress as he pledged his life to her. He would promise to love and cherish her for the rest of his days, in sickness and in health, richer or poorer. He would make sure she never felt alone, never felt sad, and that her family never went hungry. He would take care of her, whether he was stuck inside this house or not. She would be his happy ending, and he would be hers.

Too bad the name on this banner did indeed read Jack.

* * *

The Order’s engagement party was a happy event for everyone— everyone, except Sirius. He sat in the corner and contemptuously watched the party unfold around him, consuming over half the bottle of scotch clutched in his left hand.

She seemed to be avoiding him this evening, avoiding looking in his direction. He knew she knew he was staring at her, for the simple that the few times she had caught his eye, she flushed as she looked away quickly, only to look back at him when she thought he wasn’t looking. She hadn’t avoided him at all until now, what was different about tonight? Did something about his presence make her second guess her impeding wedding? Was she still in love with him?

The liquid courage flooding through him gave him a false sense of assurance. He wanted her to have all the facts before going through with such a large commitment. He wanted her to know that he loved her— he needed her to know. Even if it were too late, she needed to know. _God, I hope it’s not too late._

He stood to approach her, taking a few clumsy steps in her direction. She looked absolutely stunning tonight, her vibrant red curls dazzling in the middle of the room under the glow of the oil-lit chandelier. Her fitted black dress hugged her body perfectly, her small waist and full hips emphasized.  He didn’t get much closer before he felt a strong grip on his shoulder, stopping him in his tracks.

“A word?” Remus muttered quietly, in his ear.

“You know, I use to threaten to cut men’s hands off for touching me” Sirius said irritably.

Remus simply raised an eyebrow, not removing his hand from Sirius’s shoulder.

“I’d like to see you try. A word, over here”

Remus dragged Sirius into the pantry, looking over his shoulder to ensure no one followed them. He spoke with a hushed tone— harsh, and stern.

“Leave her alone. She is getting married tomorrow.”

“I haven’t said a word to her all night!” Sirius said incredulously

“Yes, but I’ve been watching you watching her; leave her alone.”

Sirius sighed “She deserves to know how I feel.”

“No—” Remus scolded “If you love her, let her marry him.”

“Why? Why do I have to be miserable? Haven’t I suffered enough in my lifetime?”

“You can’t give her the life she needs...”

“Just because you want to sit back and be miserable doesn’t mean I should with you.”

Sirius pushed Remus out of the way forcefully, marching back into the party. He walked up right behind Allie, placing a hand on her shoulder and interrupting her conversation with Tonks.

“Can I talk to you?” he grumbled. “In private.”

Allie nodded, looking at him curiously. Remus skulked in the doorway to the pantry, glaring at him disapprovingly. Sirius took her by the wrist and led her up the kitchen stairs and into the drawing room, closing the door behind them.

“What’s going on?” She asked

“I just need to talk to you.”

His words were slurred slightly as he spoke. He rocked back and forth on his heels, looking down at the floor.

“How much have you had to drink…?” she asked softly

“Not nearly enough for this,” he sighed, rocking back and forth on his heels as he looked down at the floor “Don’t do it— don’t marry him.”

She paused, furrowing her brow “…Say that again?”

“Don’t marry him.” Sirius repeated, still avoiding her gaze.

“Don’t marry him…?” Allie blinked for a moment as she stared at him. When she spoke finally, her voice was just barely above a whisper. “Why not?”

Sirius looked up, now meeting her gaze. His palms were sweating, his insides were fluttering— he had never been more terrified to speak a simple sentence in his entire life. “Because I love you, Allie”

She stared at him for a moment longer, vacantly. After she seemed to process what he said, anger flashed across her expression. She gritted her teeth, raising her right hand and striking him hard across the cheek.

“You waited until the week before my wedding to tell me this?” she whispered harshly “Why didn’t you tell me this sooner?”

“I thought letting you marry him was the best thing for you” he said, rubbing his stinging cheek “I thought that if I love you, I needed to let you go.”

Allie’s posture relaxed as she chuckled softly, shaking her head. “That’s the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard…”

“Yeah, so I’ve been told,” Sirius muttered “Look— I’m an idiot. But I love you— my world is clearer with you around. I can’t imagine you spending your life with someone else— someone who isn’t me,” he stepped toward her “Don’t marry him. Please, _god—_ don’t marry him.”

He reached out and cupped her face with his hand. She closed her eyes and sighed, leaning her cheek into his palm.

“What would I be to call the wedding off this soon before?” she whispered.

“Human.”

She looked at him, initially with sad eyes, but her expression changed when her palm met his cheek again, this time gentle, as whisper soft as her sweet voice was. Sirius leaned forward, gently pressing his lips against hers. Her body trembled as she pressed herself into him, wrapping her arms around his neck. He wrapped an arm around her waist, and tangled a hand in her thick mane. They snogged for a minute or two; Sirius relished in the feeling of her body pressed against his, the softness of her lips against his— she tasted like honey, so sweet just like her.

“You want to take this somewhere more private?” he asked, pulling away just an inch.

“Yes.” She whispered.

He grinned, pulling her tighter against him and apparating from the drawing room to his bedroom. The moment their feet hit the floor, their snogging resumed. Sirius pushed her up against the wall, pinning her in place as his hands ran up the curves of her body. Allie gripped the bottom hem of his shirt and pulled upward, pulling if off over his head. They locked eyes; there was lust in Allie’s gaze, so much desire behind her eyes. He spun her around, pushing her curls off her back so he could find the zipper of her dress. He unzipped slowly, admiring her porcelain flesh now exposed.

As the dress pooled at her feet, he admired the curves of her butt, hips and waist from behind as Allie smiled shyly at him over her shoulder. He spun her back to face him, his eyes immediately falling on her cleavage nearly busting out of her black lace bra. As pretty as her bra was, he’d rather see it on the floor.

Allie unbuttoned his trousers and pushed them to the ground, allowing them to pool on the floor along with her dress. She followed suit with his boxers, allowing his hard cock to spring free. She bit her lip and flushed as she looked Sirius up and down.

“Like what you see, kitten?” Sirius asked huskily.

She nodded, flushing even more. He started to reach around to unhook her bra when she gasped softly,

“Wait Sirius— I haven’t— we need a contraceptive—“she said, suddenly panicked “My wand is in my cloak— downstairs…”

“Oh, oh shit, yeah— hold on, I’ve got mine here somewhere…”

Sirius stepped away, fumbling in the mess of clothing for his trousers. He found his wand after a moment; Allie was now kneeling on the bed, giving him a small smile. He wasn’t sure if there was anything sexier than her, right here right now.

“It’s been a while since I’ve done this…” he said sheepishly

He pointed his wand at her stomach and muttered an incantation. Judging by her soft giggle, he must’ve done something wrong.

“Here, let me—“

She reached for his wand, taking it and pointing it at her own stomach. After whispering an incantation just a little different than what Sirius had spoken, a soft gold glow appeared around her abdomen, disappearing as quickly as it had appeared.

“All set.” She said softly.

She handed him back his wand that he proceeded to toss over his shoulder. He kneeled on the bed with her, reaching around and unhooking her bra. Much like his wand, he tossed it over his head with a wide, toothy grin. Allie flushed again,

“Like what you see?” she asked sweetly, just above a whisper.

“ _Love_ what I see.”

He kissed her again, pulling her against him as he ran his hands up her back. He loved the feeling of her delicate hands sliding into his hair, her bare skin against his, the feeling of his cock pushing against her pubic bone, receiving slight stimulation from the little bit of friction. He leaned his body weight forward, causing her to lose her balance and fall onto her back. She let out a playful squeak followed by giggles as he kissed her neck softly, trailing down her collarbone to her left breast. She gasped as he took her nipple in his mouth, sucking gently as his hand brushed against her inner thigh.

“Sirius,” she whispered “please…”

“Well, since you asked so nicely…”

He sat up and curled his fingers around the waistband of her panties. He pulled them off slowly, locking eyes with Allie the entire time he slid the scrap of lace down her thighs. He discarded the scrap over his shoulder, enjoying the sight of her sprawled out in front of him, baring it all. He positioned his cock at her entrance, but hesitated.

“Are you ready?”

She nodded. He slid in slowly; his eyes nearly rolled back into his head as her tight walls engulfed his shaft. She felt wonderful, magnificent— he started gently, enjoying watching her pleasure visible on her face. She wasn’t the same girl he had fucked in Azkaban— he didn’t fear accidentally hurting her like he had that night. He knew it felt good for her, it was written all over her face—if only she knew how good she felt to him.

She felt so good, too good— if he wasn’t careful, he would lose it before her. Her whimpers grew more urgent; she wrapped her legs around him tightly, burying her face into the crook of his neck to muffle her moans. He felt her pussy clamp down around him, her nails dug into his back as she cried out into his skin.

“Oh thank god—“

He allowed himself to release just after her, thrusting sharply as he emptied every last drop inside her. They remained frozen in place for a moment, panting.

“I love you, Sirius Black,” Allie whispered in his ear “I love you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ahhh!! I was so excited to share this chapter with you guys. 
> 
> Thank you so much for all the comments, I love hearing your guys thoughts- it really keeps my passion for this story alive :)


	10. 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I didn't think I was going to be able to get this chapter out today, but I chose to finish this chapter rather than scrub my showers. No regrets. #notadultingtoday

She’d fallen asleep curled up against his chest. He listened to the sound of her soft snores as he traced circles against her back, feeling comforted by their skin to skin contact. He hadn’t known such an intimate touch since the few nights they had spent together in Azkaban, huddling close together to combat the icy chill that would sweep past their cell periodically.

He wasn’t sure how long they had even been up here. An hour? Two hours? He didn’t care. He never wanted this moment to end.

“Sirius? Sirius, open up!”

Remus banged on the bedroom door, startling Allie out of her deep slumber. She sat up suddenly, pulling the bedsheet up to cover herself. Irritation seethed through Sirius as he got up and started searching for his clothes.

“For merlin’s sake—” Sirius grumbled. “Give me a minute, Moony, geez...”

Remus continued to pound on the door as Sirius found his clothes, redressing quickly.

“COULD YOU GIVE ME A DAMN MINUTE?—“ Sirius hollered at the door, and the banging stopped. _“jesus fucking christ…”_ he added under his breath. _“Someone better be dying.”_

Sirius turned back to Allie, now curled up in a ball with her back pressed against the headboard and sheet pulled up to her neck. He gave her a weak smile and kissed her forehead, speaking to her gently. “I’ll get rid of him, kitten; be back in a flash.”

Sirius slipped out the bedroom door and shut it behind him quickly, as to keep Remus from catching a glimpse of Allie inside.

“Are you _trying_ to rile up my mother’s portait?” he grumbled “your pounding sounded like a goddamn freight train derailing…”

Remus stood with his arms crossed, looking unamused.

“Your shirt is inside out.”

Sirius muttered expletives under his breath as he fixed his shirt under Remus’s obtrusive stare.

“Is Allie in there?” Remus asked “She’s been gone from the party over an hour.”

“Yes, she is.”

“What were you thinking?” Remus scolded “She’s getting married next week!”

“That is between her and me.” Sirius said pointedly. “What do you need? Need me to come downstairs and tell everyone to go on home?”

Remus huffed, shaking his head disapprovingly “I don’t think she’d appreciate you putting her infidelity on blast.”

“I’ll tell everyone she was feeling ill,” Sirius said impatiently “Too much champagne— it’s believable.”

Sirius pushed past Remus with a not-so-gentle shove, and made his was down the few flights of stairs to the basement kitchen. Most of the party guests were still here, mingling and drinking as normal.

“Oh Sirius, there you are— have you seen Allie?” Molly asked “She disappeared over an hour ago.”

“Allie isn’t feeling well— Champagne, you know…”

The Order members all let out a few ‘ahhs’, except Tonks, who smirked at Sirius from the corner of the kitchen.

“She said thank you for the party, but she needed to lie down.”

Sirius turned and left before anyone could ask him questions. He felt Remus’s eyes on him as he retreated back up the basement stairs. He didn’t turn back to look at him, still irritated that Remus ruined his picturesque evening.

Sirius returned to his bedroom to find Allie sitting on the windowsill, wrapped in a bedsheet, tears streaming down her face. The grayish blue moonlight illuminated her porcelain skin with an ethereal glow. Despite her eyelids beginning to swell from crying, Sirius couldn’t help but think how lovely she looked right now— the sight of her was hauntingly beautiful.

“What’s wrong?”

He was pretty sure he knew what was wrong before he even asked. She was twirling her engagement ring around her finger anxiously, gaze fixated on a point outside the window.

 “I am a _terrible_ person…”

“No, no you’re not—“ Sirius kneeled down next to her “I put you in a very unfair position,” he sighed heavily “I’m no good with this stuff, kitten— I’m sorry.”

“It’s not that Sirius,” She said softly “I want this. I want you. I love you; I’ve loved you for a long time. I just… I also care about Jack, and it hurts me to know I will hurt him.”

“I can talk to him with you?” Sirius offered. “I’ll take responsibility.”

“No, you are a convict on the run;” she said, shaking her head “Don’t be stupid.”

Sirius snickered softly “I’m pretty good at being stupid, aren’t I?”

Allie couldn’t help but laugh; she fought a smile, but couldn’t hold back. They were silent for a moment as Sirius reached for her hand, stroking his thumb over her knuckles as they pressed their foreheads together.

“Come on kitten, you want to come back to bed? I told them all you weren’t feeling well and went to lie down.”

Allie shook her head, speaking softly. “I don’t feel much like sleeping anymore.”

A wide, boyish grin spread across Sirius’s face “Well, then I can think of something else we can do…”

Allie rolled her eyes as she laughed softly. She reached up and stroked Sirius’s cheek gently, her eyes roving over his face before she frowned.

“Jack is expecting me this evening, I told him I wouldn’t be out late.”

“Send him an owl, tell him you had too much champagne and need to sleep it off.”

“No, I need to just go ahead and speak with him tonight,” Allie shook her head “get it over with.”

He watched her redress, admiring the way her hair bounced as she wiggled back into her dress. He wished desperately she would stay, to curl up against his chest as he would draw lazy patterns over her velvet skin.

“I’ll be back tomorrow? If that’s alright?” she said, turning to him.

“You don’t need my permission, my home is yours now.”

He caught her waist and pulled her close. He tucked a lock of her bouncy curls behind her ear as he admired her round cheeks, now flooding with color.

“I love you.” he whispered

She pressed her lips to his, wrapping her arms around his neck. Sirius took note in how perfect their bodies fit together as she pressed herself to him. Everything about her was intoxicating; the softness of her lifts, the floral notes of her perfume, the feel of her smooth skin under his palms.

As he watched her leave his bedroom, watching her full hips sway with her gait, he had to pinch himself, for he couldn’t believe such a woman was his.

* * *

 

Damn imperturbable charms.

Tonks had pulled Remus into the drawing room rather quickly the next afternoon, slamming the door shut and casting this charm to mute their conversation. Sirius had his ear pressed to the door, unable to contain his curiosity. Much to his dissatisfaction, he couldn’t hear a damn thing, no matter how hard he strained.

As he was in the middle of trying to stick his nose in Remus’s business (Sirius was only returning the favor, as Remus was always sticking his nose in his), the front door opened, and Allie stepped inside, eyes puffy and red, and a suitcase in each hand. She looked at him, frowning.

“I need to move in,” she said softly, looking down at the floor. “If that’s alright.”

Sirius nearly floated he stepped over to her so fast. His hands wove into her hair as he kissed her firmly. She dropped her suitcases and started trembling. It was only after he pulled away that he realized she was crying.

“Nothing would make me happier,” Sirius said, smiling at her reassuringly. “Why don’t you go unpack and freshen up? I’ll make us a cuppa.”

She nodded, sniffling and wiping her eyes “Alright; is anyone else here?”

“Moony and Tonks are chatting in the drawing room, but it’s just them.”

Allie smiled slightly as she shifted her gaze at the drawing room door. “Would it be alright if we had our tea upstairs?”

“Of course, whatever you want, kitten.”

Despite her puffy eyes and patchy skin, Sirius couldn’t help but think Allie looked adorable curled up in the corner of his bed, leaning against the wall as she clutched her tea mug in her palms. Sirius took note that she no longer donned the glinting engagement ring on her left hand.

“You want to talk about what happened?” he asked, taking a sip of his steaming tea.

“I went to Jack’s last night. I told him I couldn’t go through with the wedding,” Allie pulled her neckline to the side to reveal a love bite Sirius left on her the night before “he knew why when he saw this.”

“Oops…” Sirius felt a pang of guilt— he might’ve gotten a little carried away in his eagerness to fuck her. “Was he angry?”

“Of course he was,” she whispered, shrugging “But not as angry as my mum. I went home after I finished talking to him, and she screamed at me for _hours._ I’ve never seen her so mad.”

“Did you tell her you left your fiancé for a convicted murderer you met in prison?”

Sirius looked at her with a deadpan expression. After a moment of silence, she broke out into laughter, her expression softening. She seemed to relax a little bit after a bit of a laugh.

 “No, but mum assumed it was somebody in my ‘little group’, she calls it— she told me if I was willing to throw my life away for a man in this group then I could just come live with him instead.”

Sirius took a moment to digest this, unsure of what to say to this. He decided to resort to his humor once more.

“How did she know it was a bloke? Maybe you were throwing away your marriage for a lady…”

“ohmygod,” Allie started laughing again “you’re stupid.”

Sirius grinned wryly “Tell me kitten, are you into ladies like that? ‘Cause I could be into watching that…”

“Stop!” Allie now squealed with laughter, her face a deep shade of scarlet. “I’m not into girls like that.”

“What? No licky fish after you got yourself a lady roommate in Azkaban? I would’ve taken _full_ advantage of that if I were you…”

“SIRIUS!”

Allie was laughing so hard she was coughing, spilling her tea as sucked in breaths with strangled gulps. Sirius laughed just as hard, more so finding her laughing more humorous than his lesbian quips.

“I thought you needed a good laugh,” he said, clutching his side “ease that sour mood.”

After a minute, their laughter subsided. Sirius leaned back against the wall, his ankles dangling off the side of the mattress, as he was taller than the bed was wide.

“Did a good laugh actually ease that sour mood?” he asked, turning his head to her.

She nodded, smiling slightly.

“Excellent,” he flashed a wide smile “Now… any chance you know how to break an imperturbable charm from the outside?”

* * *

 

Allie had insisted she make a pie for dessert. Sirius didn’t mind that she hardly bothered to dress herself to do it.

They’d spent the afternoon in bed, Sirius’s head between her legs as she squirmed about, whining his name over and over as he made her come again, and again, and again.

They were alone for dinner that night, so Sirius insisted on making her a ‘fabulous’ romantic meal. He thought she was going to die of asphyxiation from laughing so hard when she saw the table set with his finest china, bearing peanut butter and jelly sandwiches.

_“Peanut butter and jelly sandwiches were a delicacy in prison, kitten. Surely you know this…”_

He had aimed to make dinner a comedic spectacle, and it worked. He loved how all her tension and troubles melted away when she laughed, and how her green eyes would sparkle like twin emeralds when she smiled.

After dinner, he’d pushed the china to one end of the table so he could lay her out, tearing her clothes off and throwing the articles over his shoulder. Her moans of pleasure had been music to his ears; she was usually so soft spoken, but in the thralls of a good shag, she wasn’t afraid to raise her voice.

Now, he watched her from his seat at the table bob around the kitchen in only a pair of pink panties, making what looked to be an apple pie. Sirius sipped a glass of scotch as he admired the way her butt cheeks were accentuated by the small scrap of cotton. He eyed her gorgeous bare breasts every time she turned around to smile at him.

“Staring isn’t polite, you know” she said softly, smirking.

“Who said I was polite?”

Sirius grinned over his glass of scotch as Allie bent over to place the pie in the oven. What a lovely view— a _very_ lovely view indeed.

“Alright, this pie needs a half hour…”

Sirius’s flashed at her “I can think of a good way to kill a half hour.”

Allie rolled her eyes, chuckling under her breath. “I have to work a double tomorrow, if I plan on walking, the shagging will have to wait.”

She sunk down in a chair across from Sirius, leaning back to give him a good view of her breasts. _She enjoys teasing me…_ Sirius took a large swig of his scotch shaking his head furiously as the liquid burned all the way down his throat. It took him a second to process that she would be going back to work— namely with her now ex-fiancé and furious mother.

“Do you have to work with your mum or Jack tomorrow?” he asked, furrowing his brow.

“Both, at different parts of the day.”

She stared down at the table now, her face falling. She shifted awkwardly, and then crossed her arms to cover herself. Sirius felt a pang of guilt;

“I’m sorry—“

“Don’t” she whispered, still not looking at him “This was every bit my choice too. You are not at fault.” She rose from the table, blushing. “I’m going to dress— if that’s alright?”

“You don’t need my permission to put your clothes back on,” Sirius chuckled softly “whatever makes you more comfortable, despite how lovely the view is now.”

It ended up being a very _very_ good thing that Allie had decided to get dressed. As she was pulling the apple pie out of the oven, Kingsley had arrived at 12 Grimmauld Place, his forehead creased from a concerned expression.

“The others will be here in just a moment,” Kingsley said “Dumbledore has been sacked.”

“What?!” Sirius cried “What do you mean he’s been sacked? Where is he?”

“He’s on the run now,” Kingsley said “I’ll explain everything when the other’s get here.”

It was only a few minutes before the basement kitchen was full. The table was now cramped and crowded, everyone squeezed in like sardines. Sirius held Allie’s hand under the table, out of sight from everyone as Kingsley relayed that Dumbledore had taken the fall for Harry and Hermione for their Defense Against the Dark Arts group, as they had taken to calling themselves Dumbledore’s Army.

“So what does this mean for the Order?” Tonks piped up “With Dumbledore on the run for however long…”

“We keep doing what we’re doing!” Moody gruffed “We guard the weapon as we have been. We carry on with Albus’s orders as normal.”

“And what of Harry?” Sirius interjected “and the other kids— are they safe at Hogwarts?”

“So far, yes.” Kingsley said reassuringly.

“Albus didn’t have guard duty scheduled out past this week, so I made a new schedule out through the end of the month,” Moody threw down a piece of parchment in front of him “Don’t forget to look at it. Meeting dismissed.”

Allie must’ve picked up on Sirius’s worry of Harry; she squeezed his hand underneath the table, getting his attention. Sirius turned his head to her,

“Harry will be alright,” she whispered “have faith.”

“For Umbridge’s sake, he better be,” Sirius said in a low growl “Because if any harm comes to my godson, I will kill that bitch with my bare hands.”


	11. 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once again, I've neglected my housework to bring you all this chapter. Writing this was more fun than mopping the floors would've been, anyhow. Still no regrets.
> 
> Some heavy smutty smut for you all; enjoy!

Allie came and went for work from 12 Grimmauld Place, sometimes returning with red puffy eyes, sometimes not. Nevertheless, Sirius would be waiting for her with a fresh cup of tea, ready to hear about her day. She never wanted to talk much on the days she returned home with wet cheeks and patchy skin, but he didn’t mind— they would curl up on the couch and sip their tea together all the same.

This particular evening, she had returned home a mess. Upon stepping inside the threshold, she’d collapsed into his arms, sobbing against his chest.

“Rough day?” Sirius asked

She nodded, nuzzling herself deeper into his chest, taking gasping breaths as she shuddered.

“You want to talk about it?”

She shook her head. Sirius kissed her forehead, and then stroked her back until her sobs quieted down to soft sniffles.

“You ready for a cuppa?” he asked “I sent Moony out for some new tea varieties, and he came back with a load of fancy blends. Today we’re having Lemon Hibiscus, whatever the fuck that is…”

Allie giggled as she wiped her eyes “That sounds lovely.”

He met her in the drawing room, steam rolling off the mugs of fresh floral tea. Sirius plopped down onto the couch and extended his arm to Allie; she curled up in his lap, leaning her head into the crook of his neck. Her hair was so voluminous that it acted somewhat as a pillow as he rested his cheek against the top of her head.

“Everyone has taken sides,” Allie whispered after a few minutes of silence “I’m the Leaky Cauldron’s scarlet woman. They all whisper about me— some behind my back, some knowing I can hear them.”

“That’s horseshit,” Sirius spat “You are no scarlet woman.”

“I am, well— sort of,” Allie said softly, fidgeting with her tea mug “I cheated on my fiancé. I broke a promise.”

Sirius paused, trying to read her expression. “Do you regret your choice?”

“No,” She said, without hesitation. Relief flooded through Sirius at how confidently she answered his question. “I probably shouldn’t’ve shagged you until I broke it off with him—“she smiled sheepishly, still fidgeting with her mug. “–but it was rather nice.”

Sirius grinned “It was rather nice, wasn’t it?” he set his mug down on the side table next to him, then took Allie’s from her and set it down next to his. “I was pretty buzzed then, so some details of that night are hazy. I think I need a reminder…”

He slid his hand up her skirt slowly, raising a brow at her. Allie giggled, playfully rolling her eyes.

“Is sex all you think about?” she teased

“Well, when I have a gorgeous woman sitting in my lap, it’s hard not to…”

Sirius slipped his hand down the front of her knickers, and traced his finger along her slit. Her breathing hitched as she instinctively opened her legs a slight bit; she was already wet.

“Mmm, wet for me already?” Sirius grinned even wider “Is sex all you think about, kitten?”

He slid two fingers inside of her, chuckling softly as she gasped— music to his ears. He arched his fingers, feeling for the soft spongy spot that would make her cry out for him.

“I bet— you— call— all the girls— kitten— _ah!_ ”

Sirius leaned in, grinning wider at the cry that escaped her lips when he found her sweet spot. He rested his lips against her ear, whispering huskily.

“Only the ones I like.”

Her gasps and moans filled the room as Sirius worked his fingers inside her. His thumb brushed over her clit gently, making her whole body shudder.

“That’s it, almost there…” he whispered to her, coaxing her to her climax. “Let go, give yourself over to me…”

Her muscles clamped down around his fingers, and she about fell out of his lap; Sirius held her in place with one arm around her waist, kissing her neck as she gasped for air. He continued to move his fingers in and out, but slowed his pace. He moved just enough to keep her aroused.

“You’re so beautiful…” he purred in her ear “Gorgeous… amazing… wonderful…”

Allie turned her face to him; her gaze was filled with lust, with need. She kissed him fervently, leaning all her body weight into him and clumsily grabbing at his belt.

“Please, I need you inside me,” She whispered, shifting to straddle him “Please, Sirius…”

His cock pulsed as she begged for him; her words almost enough to set him over the edge. Sirius slid his hands up her thighs and pulled the crotch of her panties to the side. He positioned his head at her entrance and pushed in;

“You don’t have to ask me twice.”

She gasped as he groaned. Her walls squeezed him tight as he pulled her down onto him and sunk his full length inside.  He kissed the hollow of her throat and nipped at the crook of her neck, leaving love bites behind.

“You feel so good, Allie,” he said in a low growl “So _fucking_ good…”

Her full uniform skirt encased their laps like a thick blanket. He gripped her hips underneath the bolts of fabric, guiding her up and down. Her eyes were closed, her head was thrown back— she was losing herself in pleasure. The sights nearly made Sirius lose it himself, but no, he was not an inexperienced 15 year old boy. He would stay hard for her, he would.

There was something extremely erotic about being mostly clothed, but participating in such an intimate act. Her uniform was modest; a knee length A-line skirt and a ¾ sleeve plain blouse, but she made it look sexier than a thin scrap of lacy lingerie. However, he did wish her blouse would’ve been a button down, for he wanted to rip her shirt open to reveal those lovely breasts he was so fond of. Next time, perhaps.

Her whimpers grew louder as he thrusted deeper into her; her hands tangled into his hair as hands slid around to grip her asscheeks, kneading and squeezing her tender flesh. She was so slick, so tight—he needed her to finish soon or he would lose himself. She felt so good— _too_ good, and judging by the sounds she made, he must feel pretty good to her too.

Allie climaxed with a sharp cry, shuddering in his lap and fisting handfuls of his hair. He was about to finish, about to let it go when Allie noticed something behind them, gasping and jumping back so hard she fell out of his lap and onto the floor.

He whipped his head around to see Molly, white-faced and shocked, standing in the doorway. Sirius gritted his teeth and let out a frustrated growl as he quickly tucked himself back into his trousers. _Fucking blue-balled by Molly Weasley._

“Can I help you with something, Molly?” Sirius asked pointedly.

“Isn’t she getting married in the morning?” Molly asked. Her tone was sharp, accusatory.

“No, she’s not. Not anymore.”

Color flooded back to Molly’s face as she spoke again. “I’d like a private word with you, Sirius— in the kitchen.”

She spun on her heel and exited the room. Sirius swore under his breath and turned back to Allie. She now was standing, wrapping her arms around herself protectively with tears swimming in her eyes. Her face was deep scarlet; she looked humiliated.

“I’m so sorry she walked in on that,” Sirius said, standing and pulling her close. He wiped a tray tear from her cheek. “You have nothing to be ashamed for, you know that?”

Her chin quivered, and a few more stray tears slid down her cheek, but despite this, she nodded and pressed her forehead into his.

“Why don’t you go upstairs and freshen up?” he suggested “change into something more comfortable. I’ll meet you up there when I deal with her.”

“Alright.” She whispered.

Sirius gave her a quick peck on the lips and smiled. “Alright.”

He walked her to the stairs, kissing her gently on the lips one more time before she ascended. her footsteps light as air. Once she was out of sight, he spun on his heels and retreated begrudgingly down to the basement kitchen. Molly was seated; her mouth was pressed into a thin line, and her hands were clasped together firmly, resting atop the table. She looked like a mother who’d caught one of her teenaged sons sneaking in past curfew.

“What can I do for you this evening, Molly?” Sirius asked with false politeness.

Molly took a moment to answer. “She was to get married in the morning, Sirius.” Molly’s tone was stern, serious— _chastising_.

“She was,” he said casually “but now she’s not.”

Molly pursed her lips “what did you do to seduce her? I know it’s been hard here alone, but _merlin_ , an almost married woman?”

“Seduce her?” irritation seethed through Sirius. “Allie changed her mind. She didn’t want to marry Jack anymore once she learned how I felt about her. She had every right to make that decision for herself. If you want to paint me as the bad guy who broke up a marriage, fine, so be it, but you won’t chastise her for her choice. I will not allow you to make her feel like she has something to be ashamed of.”

The silence was tense, thick. It was nearly a full minute before Molly spoke again, speaking just above a whisper.

“This is our Headquarters. Members come and go periodically. Certainly Dumbledore wouldn’t be pleased you’re treating it as a brothel.”

“A _brothel?!_ ”  Irritation seethed further. How _dare_ she? This was _his_ house. “This is my goddamn house Molly, and I will do with it what I please. If I want to shag my girlfriend on the couch, so be it. If I want to walk around in the buff, so be it. Knock next time if you’re worried you’ll see something you don’t like.”

Color flooded through Molly’s face “I happen to have Allie’s best interest in mind—“

“As do I,” Sirius interrupted “She’s an adult, and she made a decision to break off her engagement. The rest is none of your concern, she isn’t one of your kids so you do not have a say in her decision.”

Another silent minute went by. Sirius started clanking around the kitchen for fresh cups of tea for him and Allie; surely theirs had gone cold while they were shagging.

“Now, you came here for something, obviously. What can I do for you?”

“Alastor thinks it best to brush up on our dueling. With Dumbledore gone, he wants to keep us in tip top shape in case we need it.” Molly spoke flatly, to the point— Sirius knew she was not happy with him. “Would tomorrow be alright with you, since this is your house?” she added, her tone laced with venom.

“That works fine,” Sirius said stiffly. “Tomorrow it is.”

Molly rose and exited the kitchen without another word, and without looking back. Sirius grumbled under his breath once she was gone, then entered the pantry and started rummaging for junk food. James used to always say that Lily craved junk food when she was upset; potentially some licorice wands and a bag of potato chips would cheer Allie right up. After getting seriously blue-balled, he figured if it didn’t cheer her up, at least it might cheer him up.

Sirius entered his bedroom with an armful of junk food, grinning at the sight of Allie gazing out the window, donning one of his ratty old band t-shirts.

“I borrowed a shirt, if that’s alright…” she said softly

This particular shirt came from a show that he, James, Remus and Peter had attended in the summer between their 5th and 6th years— The Who had performed in London that summer. The four of them had gotten so drunk at the show and ended up renting a room at a shady muggle motel, invited some girls from the show to join them, and proceeded to trash the place. They had left in a hurry that morning upon realizing their mess, and being underage, didn’t want to risk using magic to fix the room. They left the sleeping women and a stack of pounds on the mattress with a note reading ‘Sorry about the mess, had to run’. Ah, the good old days…

“More than alright—“ Sirius grinned “you look far sexier in that shirt than I do.”

She blushed furiously, fighting a smile that eventually won out and spread across her face. She plopped down on the bed, leaning her back against the wall and bringing her knees to her chest.

“Licorice wands and potato chips?” she asked, outstretching her hand to gesture for him to join her. “A curious combination.”

“Yeah, I thought a nice, healthy snack might make you feel better.”

He sat down next to her, handing her a few licorice wands and setting the bag of chips down between them. Allie tore open one of the wrappers, placed a bit of the licorice between her teeth and snapped it in half with a quick yank.

“So healthy,” Allie giggled “However, a diet of potatoes alone _is_ sustainable…” After a moment, “Is Molly upset?”

“She’s not thrilled, mostly with me, but don’t you mind her,” Sirius waved his hand to dismiss the thought “Mad-eye wants the Order to have a dueling practice tomorrow— thinks we need to all brush up on our skills.”

“I could use the practice,” She said “I haven’t dueled since I was in school.”

“I’m sure you’re going to do just fine, with all your lessons with Remus, you’ll probably be the best one tomorrow.”

“Flattering, but I don’t think so,” After another moment pause “Do you think the rest of the Order will be upset about us?”

“It’s our lives and we are free to do as we choose,” Sirius said impatiently “Remus and Molly are the most uptight, chances are they’ll be the only ones who will cause grief over it, but I’m not anticipating any more than I’ve already received.”

Allie flushed a slight pink. “I respect these people; I want their respect in return.”

“What makes you think you did anything that would make them lose respect for you?”

Allie hunched over, fidgeting with her empty licorice wrapper. “I cheated on my fiancé.”

She needed to laugh. It was time to break out his joke arsenal; he knew he could get her to relax if she just laughed.

“Yeah, that’s true…” he said, looking at her with a deadpan expression “and with an alleged mass murderer, to boot”

It took Allie a moment, but all her tension seemed to ease once she started laughing. God, he loved her smile; it lit up the entire room, in his mind. Sirius grinned

“Of all the blokes you could’ve gotten stuck with in Azkaban, aren’t you glad you got stuck with the one innocent one?”

Allie’s laughter settled. “I am thankful every day it was you I was placed with,” she leaned her head to the side and rested her temple on his shoulder. “I love you, I don’t want you to think I ever regret choosing you. I made my bed, now I have to lie in it,” she hunched her shoulders once more. “Unfortunately, knowing this doesn’t make it easier to ignore the whispers and stares.” She added, muttering.

Sirius took her hand, squeezing gently.

“I love you, Allie,” he said softly “I’ve never felt this way about anybody before. I keep waiting to wake up alone in my cell in Azkaban, that the past few years never happened, and that this is all a dream. I spent years convincing myself I would never have this, would never have what James and Lily had before they died.”

At the mention of James and Lily, Peter flashed across his mind. He hated that vile rat— that piece of shit that ruined his life. The Potters were dead because of him, and Sirius spent over a decade in prison because of him.

An odd thought crossed Sirius’s mind suddenly, one that he had never pieced together until this moment. For a split second, he felt a twinge of thankfulness for the time he did spend in Azkaban. Was he going mad? He was feeling thankful for _prison_?

He was going mad— for he was a man in love. He was undoubtedly, head over heels, stomach flip-flopping sick in love with the woman sitting next to him. She had become the light in his life that he’d been wishing for. He felt this twinge of thankfulness for his time spent in Azkaban, for it let him to her.

 

* * *

 

 “Allie, it’s going to be fine—“

“No, no, they are all going to be whispering about us— staring, _glowering_ —“

“Stop,” Sirius ordered softly.

Allie looked like she was going to vomit. Sirius pulled her towards him, brushing the back of his hand across her cheek “If they have anything to say about us, then they can talk to me—alright?

Allie looked unconvinced. She hunched her shoulders forward and wrapped her arms around herself as she shifted her gaze down at their feet. Sirius cupped her chin and gently pushed her up to meet his eyes. He held her stare, smiling reassuringly at her.

“Alright?” he repeated.

Allie looked at him for a moment before swallowing hard and nodding stiffly “…Alright.”

He took her hand and led her outside to 12 Grimmauld Place’s courtyard. It was as lovely back here as the rest of the house— there were dried up plants in the flower beds, the grass full of weeds, and the cement patio was veined with settlement cracks. Gorgeous. It was the goddamn Ritz-Carlton out here.

“Listen up, you lot— Allie isn’t getting married anymore, and she and I are together. If anyone has a problem with that, they can take it up with me— got it?”

Molly let out disapproving huffs, but the rest of the Order simply shrugged, seeming unaffected by this news. Remus didn’t seem as relaxed as everyone else, but wasn’t as obvious of his disdain as Molly was being. Moody’s magical eye whirred around, seeming to inspect both of them before he stood and addressed everyone.

“Alright, if we’re done with personal matters, let’s get to work— Arthur! Kingsley! You two go first.”

Arthur and Kingsley dueled impressively, but in the end, Arthur went flying onto his back. Allie and Tonks were next, and Sirius was impressed with how skilled Allie was, especially going up against a trained Auror. Allie actually won, binding Tonks with an incarcerous charm. Sirius however wasn’t as fortunate in his duel with Remus— it was him who forfeited the duel, taken down by a knee-reversing jinx.

“Alright, that’s enough for today,” Moody gruffed “we’ll do another one of these next week.

“Nice duel, padfoot,” Remus said, smirking as he extended his hand to help Sirius stand “You almost beat me with that leg-locker curse.”

“Yeah, but you cheated— that knee-reversing hex shouldn’t be allowed.” Sirius groaned, flexing his knees as he winced.

“Sore loser,” Remus teased “I’d like to use the drawing room this evening to work with Allie on her patronus— we haven’t given it a go for a few weeks.”

“Yeah, yeah, go for it.” Sirius said “she’s had a rough go of it at work though, I don’t know if she’ll be able to conjure up anything.”

Sirius hung out in the kitchen while Remus and Allie got to work in the drawing room. He spent the whole time nursing a couple glasses of scotch and rolling his eyes at Kreacher’s ramblings to himself. After an hour or so, Remus and Allie entered the kitchen; she had the largest smile on her face, grinning ear to ear.

“What’s going on?” Sirius asked, raising a brow.

“Show him.”

Remus nodded to Allie. She flourished her wand, speaking the incantation softly, but confidently.

“Expecto Patronum!”

A large silver butterfly burst from her wand, fluttering around the room for a moment before landing on Sirius’s shoulder. Allie let out a giggle, and the butterfly dissipated.

“Nice work,” Sirius said, his own grin spreading ear to ear “Suits you well.”

“Well, I’m going to go have a spot of tea—“ Remus clasped his hands together “Allie, Padfoot, care to join me?”

“Uhm, I actually need to speak with Sirius for a minute, if that’s alright?” Allie asked softly

“You don’t need my permission,” Remus said, not unkindly “I’ll keep the kettle warm.”

Allie grabbed Sirius’s hand and led him up the stairs. When they reached the top, she turned to him.

“Thank you, for earlier—in front of…”

She trailed off, but Sirius knew what she was getting at. He kissed her softly, pulling away just an inch.

“Nothing of it,” he said softly “I told you not to worry.”

She leaned back into him, and their lips pressed together. Their kiss shifted into snogging; Sirius pinned her against the wall, gripping her waist tight as her hands snaked into his hair. After a minute, he pulled away, breathing heavily.

“Shall we take this upstairs?”

Allie giggled, initiating apparition that took them to Sirius’s bedroom. Once inside, it was her that pushed him against the wall, holding him in place with her hands on his chest, and looking at him with a peculiar expression. He was about to ask her what she was up to when her lips crashed against his, and her delicate fingers began working at his belt. He felt it best not to interrupt her in this moment.

She sunk down onto her knees and slid his trousers and boxers down, allowing them to pool at his ankles. She bit her lip as she looked at his erection, then up at him. Before Sirius could say anything, she took him in her mouth, keeping her eyes on him as she did so. He let out a low growl, tangling a hand in her wild curls as her velvet tongue stroked up and down his shaft. She held him at the base of his cock with one hand, her other sliding up his thigh, kneading his flesh.

She was _wonderful—_ he felt his balls start to tighten when a heavy pounding startled him.

“Sirius! Sirius! Open up!”

_“God fucking damnit—“_ he growled “I AM IN THE MIDDLE OF SOMETHING, MOONY!”

Allie pulled back, her lips breaking contact with a soft pop. She blushed as Sirius yanked his pants back up and muttering under his breath.

“Can’t get any privacy in this goddamn house…”

“Was that okay?” Allie asked, her voice small and whisper soft.

Sirius stopped and bent down, kissing her firmly. “That was lovely, kitten, I regret we had to stop,” she blushed deeper “give me a moment, I’ll get rid of him.”

Sirius stormed over to the door, ripping it open and scowling.

“I’m a little _busy_ in—”

Remus held his hand up to silence Sirius. He was about to snap at Remus, until he noticed he was panting heavily, and his expression coated with a sense of urgency.

“Harry is in the fireplace— he needs to speak with us.”


	12. 12

“Are you alright, Harry? Do you need help?”

“No, no nothing like that. I— I just wanted to talk— about my dad.”

James? This seemed odd, for Harry to sneak to a fireplace to simply to ask about his dad out of the blue, but nevertheless Sirius was happy that he called. He and Remus kneeled in front of the hearth in the kitchen, the fire warming their faces.

“What about him?” Sirius asked.

Sirius’s stomach churned with shame as Harry recounted a memory that he didn’t particularly like thinking about. A certain moment after finishing their OWLs, and James had turned Snape into a spectacle. They had been particularly cruel to him this day, but was still a little surprised that Snape considered this to be his worst memory.

It was stupid kid stuff— James and Snape never liked each other. He wasn’t proud of the way they had treated Snape that day and others, but didn’t think much more of it than just he and James being arrogant teenagers.

“Look, Harry,” Remus said, clearing his throat once Harry finished his recount of Snape’s memory “I wouldn’t like you to judge your father on what you saw. He was only 15—“

“I’m 15!”

“Look, Harry,” Sirius ran a hand through his hair, sighing “James and Snape hated each other from the moment they set eyes on each other. It was just one of those things; surely you can understand that?” he shifted awkwardly “I think James was everything Snape wanted to be— I mean, Snape was an oddball, always up to his neck in the Dark Arts. James hated the Dark Arts.”

“Yeah,” said Harry “but he just attacked Snape for no good reason,” This time Harry shifted awkwardly “Well, actually, because you said you were bored…”

“I’m not proud of it.” Sirius said quickly.

Remus looked at Sirius from the corner of his eye, then back to the fireplace. “Look Harry, what you have to understand is that your father and Sirius were the best in the school at everything they did. Everyone thought they were the height of cool. If they sometimes got a bit carried away—”

“If we were sometimes arrogant little jerks, you mean?”

Remus smiled; surely he remembered calling him and James this frequently once he had been made Prefect.

“He kept messing up his hair!” Harry interjected

Ah, yes. James thought he looked so cool with messy hair. He used to ruffle his hair anytime Lily was nearby, hoping to catch her attention. Sirius chuckled softly,

“I had forgotten he used to do that!”

“And how he used to play with a snitch? He thought it made him look cool.” added Remus.

Harry scoffed “Well, I thought he was a bit of an idiot.”

It was Sirius’s turn to scoff; however, he did it with a playful tone. “Of course he was— we were all a bit of an idiot! Well, not Moony, really.”

“Did I ever tell you to lay off Snape?” Remus said, the smile fading from his face “Did I ever have the guts to keep you two in order?”

“Well, er, no— but you made us feel ashamed of ourselves sometimes.” Sirius turned back to Harry “Look, lots of blokes were idiots at the age of 15. James grew out of it.”

“I just never thought I’d feel sorry for Snape…” Harry muttered

“Speaking of,” Remus said “How did Snape react to you seeing this memory in his pensive?”

“He told me he would never teach me Occlumency again.”

“WHAT?!” Sirius cried “That’s it— I’m coming up there and having a word with him.”

Anger flooded through Sirius as he made to stand up; didn’t Snape know the risk of Voldemort having access to Harry’s mind? Was his pride really worth sacrificing Harry’s safety?

_Snape doesn’t care about Harry, so why should it matter to him? Of course he would rather nurse his pride._

Remus grabbed his shoulder and wrenched him back down. “No, if anyone will speak to Severus, it’s me,” Remus said “Harry, you need to tell him that under no circumstances is he to stop giving you Occlumency lessons. You learning Occlumency is the most important thing.”

“Alright, alright,” Harry said impatiently “Is someone coming down the stairs? I hear footsteps.”

Sirius turned back, expecting to see Allie, but she was nowhere in the line of sight.

“I don’t think so,” said Sirius “It must be someone on your end.”

With that, Harry yanked his head out of the fireplace quickly, and the flames changed from an emerald green to orange. Sirius felt a pang of sadness to see Harry go; he would’ve liked the chance to chat with him more.

But he was still angry. Snape _really_ had refused to give Harry any more Occlumency lessons simply because Harry stumbled upon a bad memory? The thought baffled him at just how quick Snape was willing to throw Harry to the wolves.

“Snape cannot stop these lessons,” Remus said “doesn’t he know how dangerous the connection between Harry and Voldemort’s mind will be if Harry lets him in?”

“Probably, he probably doesn’t care.”

“Dumbledore trusts Snape—“

“Yeah, well I don’t!”

Sirius stormed away irritably, marching up the few flights of stairs and back to his bedroom. Allie was sitting on the windowsill, observing the front courtyard of the townhomes of Grimmauld Place. She turned to him upon his entry, her brow furrowing.

“Everything alright?” she asked

“Oh yeah, just Snivellus being Snivellus— cares more about his pride than teaching Harry Occlumency,” Sirius began pacing around the room “He had a pensive, and Harry accidentally stumbled upon a memory…”

He relayed the memory to Allie as he continued to pace. Her face went through a reel of expressions as he spoke, seeming to grow more uncomfortable with the memory the longer he talked. Once he finished, she was silent for nearly a minute before speaking in her signature near-whisper.

“You were cruel to him.”

“That’s what you got from that?” he grumbled “James did most of it, but yeah, I guess I egged him along a bit.”

Allie’s cheeks flushed. She crossed her arms and shook her head, turning her gaze back out the window.

“I just can’t believe you ever took part in humiliating another person like that.”

Sirius opened and closed his mouth a couple times, unsure of how to respond. “I mean, I’m not proud of that day, but we were 15—“

“Harry is 15,” she interjected “I don’t recall hearing stories of him and his friends doing such things. I was 15 once, and I didn’t suspend people I didn’t like up in the air by their ankles.”

Sirius seethed with irritation. He wasn’t sure why he was letting her words get under his skin so much, but they were. He knew partly his anger with Snape was causing him to get short with her, but this thought didn’t stop him from snapping at her.

“You weren’t there; you know nothing of that day, or Snape as a teenager.”

“Maybe not, from what you told me, it seemed like picking on Snape was regular fun for your lot.”

“Well I’m sorry I’m not perfect, Allie,” Sirius snapped “I’m sorry I’m not so fucking perfect to have not made a mistake or two in my life.”

“I didn’t mean it like that—“

“Then how did you mean it? Because I was an idiot teenager you now think I need chastising 20 years after the fact?”

“I— I just meant—“

“Because last time I checked, you weren’t so fucking perfect either. Sent to Azkaban for ripping off your bakery job? _Classy.”_

Allie’s face turned beet red. “I stole that money to buy groceries, _for my family,_ if you recall.”

He knew this. He knew why she had done what she had, that she had a noble reason for breaking the law, despite it being a mistake. The logical side of his brain knew this, but the irritated and anger ridden emotional side of his brain wanted to throw it back in her face. She wanted to chastise him for making a mistake? Well, two could play that game.

“Oh, so it’s ok then? Because you have a bleeding heart reason for doing so? If you stole that money to go on a shopping spree, that would make it bad? You’ve fucked up in your life too, so get off your fucking high horse.”

Allie’s jaw was clenched so tight a small vein in her temple was popping out. “I don’t deserve this right now.” She muttered as she shook her head. She turned away from him, and walked out the bedroom door.

“And just where are you going?” he asked pointedly.

He followed her out and down the hall. She was walking with purpose, rather quickly, her hands balled into fists.

“Allie, where are you going?”

“Out.”

Sirius scoffed “Out where? You don’t work tonight.”

 “Just out. Out for a walk, our for some air,” she made her way down the stairs now, not looking back “you’re not very pleasant to be around right now, so I think I’ll just go.”

_Go?_

Panic replaced all his anger and irritation; he didn’t want her to go. He started mentally kicking himself, knowing he was wrong to have been so harsh with her. Why was he such a git? So stupid to think he would feel better to put her down? Maybe that was the exact cruelty she was talking about— the cruelty he and James forced upon Snape. He always thought it was dumb teenage stuff; that he had grown out of it— but had he?

Allie was opposite of this— she was uncommonly kind. That was something he loved about her. Naturally someone as kind as she would be upset to hear of anyone— interested in the Dark Arts or no— was being mistreated. Allie’s kindness had always reminded Sirius of Lily in that respect and he remembered how furious Lily had been that day. He remembered how red her face got as she reprimanded James in front of everyone for making a spectacle of Snape.

Sirius knew 20 years ago that their treatment of Snape that day wasn’t fair, just as he knew it hadn’t been today. He wasn’t proud of the way he had treated him, and he certainly wasn’t proud of how he threw Allie’s crime back in her face. It was wrong of him, he knew this. What if he had just ruined everything—simply because he couldn’t keep his temper in check?

 “I’m sorry, wait—“

Allie threw her traveling cloak around her shoulders, fastening the brooch clasp with shaking hands.

“Allie, just hold on—“

Allie ignored him, and made to exit. She had barely gotten the door open when Sirius reached above her head and slammed the door back shut and held it there with his palm.

 “Please don’t go,” his voice broke as he spoke. “I’m sorry, please don’t go.”

A lump formed in his throat, his heart felt like it was falling out of him. He would lose his composure if he spoke the words running through his brain at lightning speed.

_Please don’t go, please don’t leave me here. I’m an idiot, I’m sorry, please don’t go. I love you. Don’t leave. Don’t leave me._

She turned around, and her face softened at the sight of his expression.

 “Oh, Sirius—”

Allie raised her palm to his cheek and stroked gently. He wanted to melt into her arms and beg for forgiveness, tell her how sorry he was, but the words wouldn’t form. All he was able to do was choke out a small, pathetic sentence.

 “I can’t lose you.”

“You’re not losing me,” she reached out to cup his face with one hand, gently stroking his cheek with her thumb. He leaned into her palm, comforted by her touch. “I wasn’t leaving _you_ , I was just leaving to get some air.”

_She isn’t leaving? She doesn’t hate me that much? I would hate me. I sort of do hate me._

Allie stood on her tip toes and kissed him softly “why don’t you come with me? It’s a lovely evening for a walk.”

“You want me to come with you?” he asked incredulously

“Only if you apologize for being a git,” she said softly.

 “I am sorry,” he breathed “I’m a git— a stupid, idiotic wanker, really.”

Allie smiled “Come on, let’s get some air— merlin knows you could use it.”

“But I’m not supposed to leave the house…”

She laughed gently, “When has that stopped you before?”

Allie drew her wand and flicked it at the umbrella stand. It transfigured to an orange dog leash and collar, and flew into her hand.

“Come on, Sirius— where is your sense of adventure?”

* * *

It was indeed a lovely evening for a walk. The breeze was gentle and warm, ruffling Sirius’s fur gently. The collar was a touch itchy, but he put up with it.

They walked around a few blocks, observing the blooming gardens of muggle homes until they reached the nearby pond at the edge of the local park. They lay in the grass, observing the few stars that could be seen from within the city limits. Sirius rested his head on Allie’s stomach, enjoying the sensation of her fingernails raking through his fur.

_This is freedom._ He thought. It was such a simple pleasure, sitting by a pond on a warm spring night, enjoying the breeze and the stars— if only this could be his reality every day.

When was the last time he was able to enjoy himself like this? Surely, he’d been outside numerous times since he escaped from Azkaban, but there was something about just taking a few moments to really enjoy being outside that made this such a humbling experience.

He was surprised she wanted to go on a walk with him, especially with how cruel he was to her. It was an error on his part, for sure. He wouldn’t allow himself to take his frustration out on her again.

“Kids were cruel to me,” she said softly, out of the blue “in school.”

Sirius moved his head to see her better, unable to speak as he was in his canine form.

“I am not fond of the nickname Mute Murphy, but it is rather fitting,” She continued to rake through his fur and she spoke, staring up at the sky “Kids used to tease me about my hair too— they would try to hide things in it, wondering how long I could go with pens, gum or other trinkets. They made fun of how big it was— I can’t help it, nothing I do can tame these curls.”

Sirius licked her hand gently. _I like your curls. They’re lovely._

“Bullies are a little sensitive of a subject for me. I’m sorry I got so upset with you; I understand that was a long time ago— a different time.”

They laid in silence for another few minutes, but the silence wasn’t awkward. It was peaceful, enjoyable; they were comfortable in each other’s presence.

“Allie?”

Allie sat up abruptly, as did Sirius. Sirius whipped around, his heart pounding. _Jack._

“Jack?” Allie said, standing up “What’re you doing here?”

“I started walking around this pond after work sometimes;” he said “clears my head, sort of.”

Sirius could smell the stench of alcohol on him from a few paces away. He looked rough; a 5 o clock shadow, bags under his eyes, his hair in need of a trim— still somewhat handsome, however.

“I’m glad you’re here,” Jack slurred “I’ve been meaning to talk to you.”

“You see me at work 4 days a week.” Allie furrowed her brow “You could talk to me whenever.”

“No, I wanted to speak with you alone,” he said, then turned his attention to Sirius “Is that the stray that came into the pub a few months ago?”

“Oh,” Allie flushed “y—yes. I found him again. He’s my dog now.”

Jack observed Sirius closely; Sirius let out a soft growl, sitting down. Jack continued to stare at him for a moment, and then looked back at Allie.

“I miss you, Allie— I feel lost without you.”

Jack stepped closer to Allie. She flushed even deeper, her nostrils flaring as she must’ve picked up on the strong stench of alcohol.

“How much have you had to drink?” she asked

“A bit.”

Jack stepped even closer. Allie placed her hands on his chest, seeming in an attempt to keep him from stepping closer. He grabbed her wrists gently and pulled her hands up to his face, kissing the backs of her fingers gently.

“Jack—“

“How could you do that to me?” he asked, now resting his cheek against her hands “How could you cheat on me? I loved you. I still love you.”

“I’m sorry,” Allie whispered “I didn’t intend for it to happen—“

“But it did happen,” Jack snapped, his grip tightened on her wrists “who is it? What’s the bloke’s name?”

“I’ve told you, I’m not comfortable sharing that,” Allie said “please let go of me.”

Sirius let out another growl, this time louder. He didn’t like how quick Jack was to snap at her.

“I want to know his name,” Jack growled, his words slurring together “I want to know who the asshole is that fucked my fiancée!”

“Jack, you’re hurting me,” Allie whimpered “please let go.”

“Tell me who it is!” Jack shouted, gripping her wrists so tight her hands were turning red “Tell me who he is so I can give him a piece of my mind!”

“Let go of me!” Allie squeaked

Sirius felt his blood boil. He transformed back into his human form and grabbed Jack by the shoulders and ripped him back away from Allie. He flailed as he stumbled backwards, but regained his footing. The moment he saw Sirius his face drained of all color, his mouth hung open and his eyes bugged.

“I believe she told you to let go of her, Jack.”

Sirius punched Jack across the jaw hard, instantly knocking him unconscious. The tall wizard crumpled to a heap onto the ground at Sirius’s feet.

“ _Sirius!”_ Allie hissed “He saw your face!”

“He was hurting you,” Sirius reached for her, taking her hands and examining her wrists. She hissed in pain, and pulled away. “Bloke was so drunk he didn’t know his own strength.”

“You need to get home,” She said urgently “before someone else comes along. I’ll get him home.”

“Let me help you—“

“No!” she squeaked “If someone else sees you, you’re done for. Please Sirius, if you’re—“her voice started shaking “— if you’re caught...”

“Allie,” Sirius reached for her hand, keeping in mind to remain gentle. “I’m not going anywhere.”

“If you’re seen, you will— you’ll go back to Azkaban.” she shook her head, swallowing hard. “I shouldn’t’ve brought you out. This was my mistake, it’s all my fault—“

Voices interrupted her; faint, but close by. They both froze for a second, listening. The voices were growing closer.

“Please Sirius, go!” she whispered urgently

“But—“

“GO!”

Sirius gritted his teeth. The last thing he wanted to do was leave her here alone, with a drunk and unconscious Jack, but the urgency in her voice and the panic in her eyes made him comply. He stepped back, closed his eyes, and allowed the world to compress him into darkness.

* * *

The sun was just starting to peak out over the horizon when the front door creaked open. Sirius sat up abruptly; he’d been on the couch in the drawing room since he’d gotten home, staring at the Black family tapestry as he awaited Allie’s return. He hustled out to the foyer to find her hanging her traveling cloak on the coatrack. She looked exhausted; her eyes were rimmed red and shadowed with dark purple bags.

“You hit him pretty good;” she said “he was out for nearly two hours.”

“How long did it take you to convince him it wasn’t Sirius Black that punched him?”

Sirius had been mentally cursing himself all night; it was extremely reckless to have revealed himself to Jack.

“Not long actually. He was pretty snockered, so that worked to our advantage.”

There was an awkward pause between them. Sirius wasn’t sure what to say; he could apologize profusely for his recklessness, but if he were being honest, he wouldn’t change what happened. He had been hurting her, and he would clock Jack across the face again in a heartbeat if had to.

“Are you alright?” he asked finally.

“Yeah.”

She rubbed her wrists as she looked down at the floor; she now had purple bruises around her wrists like bracelets. The sight made Sirius flood with anger once more. He didn’t care how drunk Jack had been; how dare he hurt her.

“Has he ever grabbed you like that before?”

“No,” she shook her head “never. It was very out of character.”

Sirius stared at Allie as Allie stared at the floor during another awkward pause. She didn’t seem to want to talk about the events of the evening; whether she was embarrassed that Sirius witnessed her interaction with Jack, or was just simply exhausted. Nevertheless, she threw her arms around him and buried her face into his chest. He snaked one hand into her curls and wrapped his other arm around her waist; he could smell the fresh florals of her shampoo as he placed a kiss on top of her head.

“I love you,” he whispered “I would do anything for you— including reveal myself and punch your ex-fiancé in the face for getting handsy.”

Allie let out a soft bit of laughter “Maybe just don’t make a habit of revealing yourself, or punching blokes,” She stood on her tip toes and kissed him gently, then took his hand and gently pulled him along to the stairs. “Come on, I’m exhausted.”

She curled up against his chest in bed, falling asleep almost instantly as Sirius massaged her scalp and stared at the ceiling. Laying here, listening only to the sounds of her gentle breathing, his mind started to wander. Allie had said it hadn’t taken much to convince Jack that the man who clocked him in the jaw wasn’t mass murderer Sirius Black, but was that because Jack was severely intoxicated at the time? Or was Jack just pretending to be convinced?

Nah, Jack had been incredibly drunk. There would be no way that he could have a clear memory of what had happened. Still, the thought gnawed at Sirius, the uncertainty stirred within him. His mind flashed to his 9x9 cell, remembering the cold of the cement on his feet every morning, the stiffness of the overly starched sheets, the bone chilling cold accompanied by the dementors. It had been nearly 3 years since he escaped— it was a distant memory at this point.

But if he wasn’t careful, the solitary life he knew for 12 years would become his reality once more.


	13. 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We're going to hang out with Allie for the majority of this chapter. It was kind of fun to switch narrative perspectives and dive into her brain for a minute. Let me know if you all liked it in the comments!

Allie stood in front of the grimy bedroom mirror, trying to untangle a chunk of her curls that had dreadlocked while she was sleeping. She tugged at it gently, then roughly, but the tangle wouldn’t budge.

“Isn’t there a spell for that?”

Sirius was smirking at her from the bed, having been watching her dress and get ready for work.

“I don’t know it, if there is.”

That wasn’t entirely true— there was a spell that untangled hair, but it never worked on her unmanageable mane. She had tried numerous times when she was younger, especially when prats would tangle objects in her hair during class, but the spell seemed to have no effect. She eventually quit trying and learned to put some elbow grease into taming her hair.

“Bring me the hairbrush, let me help you.”

“You can’t brush curly hair when it’s dry, it’ll frizz.”

“What you’re doing isn’t much better,” Sirius chuckled “Bring me the hairbrush.”

Allie obliged. She handed Sirius the hairbrush from the dresser, and sat on the edge of the bed. He sat up and positioned himself behind her, one leg on each side of her and his chest against her back. He started brushing the dreadlock gently, starting at the bottom and working his way up the shaft.

“Does this hurt? Am I tugging too hard?”

“No, this is fine.”

He was extremely gentle, and in a matter of a minute, the tangle was gone.

“There,” he brushed her hair to one side and placed a kiss in the crook of her neck “tangle free, kitten.”

_Kitten—_ she loved when he called her that. His little pet name made her stomach roll with pleasure every time he said it. She leaned back into him, craning her neck to the side in hopes he would kiss her again. He did, gently suckling her flesh from below her earlobe down to the top of her shoulder. The scratch of his stubble against her skin sent a wave of goosebumps through her; what she wouldn’t give to stay home from work and spend the day rolling between the sheets.

“Are you sure you’re going to be alright going back to work? Does he work today?”

Allie looked down at her wrists, ringed with bruises that were now fading to a sickly green and yellow compared to the black and purple they were a few days prior. She hadn’t been to work since her encounter with Jack, and she wasn’t looking forward to seeing him. She wasn’t even sure if he remembered how roughly he had grabbed her, much less anything else.

“He does work today,” she said softly “I should be fine, though.”

She should be fine, yes, but how uncomfortable would it be? At this point however, every day had become uncomfortable at the Leaky Cauldron since calling off the wedding. Her and her mother had maybe only spoken two words to each other, the other workers would whisper about her, and Jack would continuously stare at her from behind the bar, looking away if she glanced in his direction. The only person who had been mostly normal had been Shannon.

Sitting here in Sirius’s arms, she wanted nothing more than to play sick and abandon her shift. She couldn’t do it however, even though she _really_ wanted to. She needed the money. Bridget and Teagan had a birthday coming up, and Rory had owled last week and said his uniform pants Colleen had purchased him 4 months ago were already too short. All of these things were expensive, and she knew her mother was struggling to pull herself out of the pile of debt she had accumulated trying to support 5 kids on her own. Even though Colleen could barely look at her, Allie still gave Shannon a sack of coins weekly to deliver to her.

Allie stood and smoothed the front of her uniform skirt, then spun around to kiss Sirius.

“I’ll see you this evening,” she said “I love you.”

Oh, and that she did. She loved him with every fiber of her being, and had loved him since their days spent together in a concrete 9x9 cell. She loved in a way she couldn’t describe; a way she didn’t understand.

She had loved Jack, in a different way. Jack had been kind to her, treated her well— had Sirius never been in the picture, they would’ve had a lovely little life together. A house in the countryside, a few children, and holidays in Barcelona or Rome— it would’ve been enough, if she didn’t know what she was missing.

Sirius awakened something within her that she didn’t know was there. A fire deep in her soul came to life as if she had been a slumbering dragon, now awake and vibrant. She had never felt so intensely since meeting him— didn’t know such passion, such emotion. He made her shake with nervousness, yet felt more comfortable in his presence than anyone she knew. Once she experienced these intense emotions, she knew spending her life with someone who didn’t make her feel the way Sirius did wouldn’t be enough.

A few more kisses between them and she was on her way. She could simply apparate to work, but she enjoyed the quiet in the ten minutes it took her to walk from 12 Grimmauld Place to the Leaky Cauldron. She loved to listen to the wind rustling the now-leaved trees that early May brought, and look at the gardens of the townhomes along her route. She loved flowers; maybe Sirius would enjoy it if she put in a garden— something to spruce up the old house and lift his spirits on his grumpy days. Looking at flowers always made her happy; certainly she hoped they would have the same effect on him.

The Leaky Cauldron wasn’t busy for lunch, but that was typical for a Tuesday. There were a few tables occupied by tenants staying upstairs, and a few Ministry employees that frequented, but most of the restaurant was untouched. Jack stood behind the bar, drying pint glasses and sneaking glances at her when he thought she wasn’t looking. She noticed. The feeling of his eyes on the back of her head made her ears hot; she felt like an ant under a microscope. She had gotten used to everyone’s coldness over the last month, but after their encounter a few days ago, Jack’s stares felt more intrusive today than they had.

She cringed when her regular table of lunchtime drinkers arrived, and sat in her section. She would have to go to the bar and ask Jack to pour their drinks.

“Jack?” Allie asked softly, stepping into the server’s well of the bar “Could I have three pints of Meade, please?”

He poured them without a word, sneaking a glance at her splotchy green and yellow wrists once or twice. He slid the three pints to her, the drink sloshing over the edges from his carelessness. She didn’t dare ask him to top them back off.

“Thank you.”

She had barely whispered, but she knew he heard her, for he nodded stiffly before turning back to what he was doing.

“He still pouting, sweetheart?” one of the regular Meade drinkers asked her as she delivered their drinks. “He looks like his panties are in a bunch over there.”

She smiled weakly “it’s been a tough month.”

It wasn’t just the employees that knew of their breakup, but the Leaky Cauldron’s regulars as well. It made her flush thinking about all the people that knew her and Jack’s dirty business. She felt guilty their breakup had become so public.

“Well, I’d get down on one knee and ask ya, but I got a bad knee,” the man grinned “I’d marry a pretty thing like you in a heartbeat, and now that you’re on the market...”

“Easy there, Leroy,” the man to his left piped up, smacking the man called Leroy on the back. “Allie here is way out of your league.”

“Not true!” Leroy laughed wheezily, showcasing yellowed crooked teeth “Tell ‘em Allie, tell ‘em how we’re in love!”

Allie flushed, rolling her eyes playfully “I’m seeing someone Leroy, but I do cherish these lunch dates.”

And indeed, she cherished Leroy and his mates that came to the Leaky Cauldron 3 times a week, for they always tipped her a galleon each.

Lunch winded down, and Allie had retreated to the kitchen to roll silverware to prepare for the dinner shift. She jumped when a hand gripped her shoulder tightly, followed by her mother’s voice hissing in her ear.

“Why is the Minister for Magic here to see you?”

Allie furrowed her brow. “What?”

“You heard me. The Minister is here with a few Aurors, and is asking to speak with you.”

Allie set her silverware down and followed Colleen out of the kitchen. Sure enough, Cornelius Fudge was sitting at a table with one man she didn’t recognize, and Kingsley Shacklebolt.

“Miss Murphy,” Fudge said jovially, as if they were old friends reuniting at the grocery store. He twirled his lime green bowler hat between his fingers a few times before gesturing to the men seated on either side of him. “This is Aurors Dawlish and Shacklebolt. We’d like to have a quick word with you, if you can be spared for a moment…?”

Fudge looked at Colleen, raising a brow. His tone suggested that he was asking permission, but something about his body language seemed as though his request was not a request.

“Yes, of course,” Colleen said quickly “You may use any of our tables, or if you require more privacy, we have rooms open upstairs.”

“A room upstairs will do,” Fudge nodded “Thank you— Miss Murphy, if you would lead the way…?”

Allie swallowed hard, and then nodded stiffly before leading them to the staircase. She snuck a look at Jack as she was ascending upstairs; he was staring directly at them with an odd expression on his face.

She led them to the first open room, her nerves in a knot. She was looking to Kingsley for some kind of reassurance, but he showed no signs of recognizing her. She didn’t dare try to speak with him, or give any indication that she knew him either.

The room was a large suite, having its own kitchenette and breakfast table. Fudge, Kingsley, Dawlish and her slid into the wooden chairs around the table— Allie wiped her sweating palms on her skirt. Why were they here to talk to her?”

“Do you know why we’ve come to see you today, Miss Murphy?”

Fudge’s tone was saccharine sweet as he addressed her. Allie simply shook her head.

“We have some questions about your former cellmate in Azkaban— Sirius Black?”

Her body flooded ice cold, but she forced herself to remain calm. “What of him?” she asked, just barely over a whisper.

“Well, our sources have been leading us to search the Tibet region, until we received a tip a few days ago that he was in London.”

“Really?” Allie asked, gripping the fabric of her skirt underneath the table “Who saw him here? In London?”

“The tip was anonymous, which is why we are here,” he leaned back in his chair, giving Allie an appraising look “You and Black had a… _curious_ relationship during your time in Azkaban, no? I’m wondering if he decided to come around to visit his former flame.”

“I hardly would call him a former flame,” Allie said softly “We were just cellmates, Minister.”

She internally praised herself for sounding so smooth, so confident. Confidence was never her strong suit, but she needed to emulate a least some— otherwise Fudge would see right through her.

“Cellmates that got a little too close for comfort, if you recall.”

She felt herself flush from her chest to her forehead as Fudge looked at her with disgust. She averted her eyes downward, humiliated to have Fudge bring up such acts. Dawlish had the same half curious-half disgusted look about him as Fudge did, but Kingsley remained still and calm as stone.

“Miss Murphy—Allison— Can I call you Allison?”

“Yes, Minister, you may call me Allison— or Allie.”

“Allie, a lovely name,” Fudge twirled his bowler hat between his fingers, looking up at the ceiling. “I’d like you to tell me where we can find him, Allie. Where can we find Sirius Black?”

“I don’t know where he is.”

“You sure haven’t seen him? He hasn’t come around at least once? Just to say hello?”

“No.”

“When was the last time you saw him?”

“In Azkaban, when I was transferred cells.”

She didn’t sound as calm and confident now as she had a minute ago. Her palms were sweating even more, her face was flushing deeper. She hoped her body’s natural reaction to stress wouldn’t give away the fact that she was lying through her teeth. Her flush might’ve given her away, because Cornelius Fudge didn’t seem to be buying it.

“Don’t lie to me, Allie,” Fudge said with a hint of threat behind his tone. He now leaned forward, his eyes narrowing at her “Lying to the Minister for Magic is a crime. Surely you don’t want to go back to prison? Azkaban is no place for a sweet girl like you.”

Fudge was not wrong; Azkaban was the last place Allie wanted to go back to. The women ganged up on her in there; yanking her hair and kicking her in the ribs for fun. She hadn’t spoken much of her time in the women’s block; she wanted to forget Bellatrix Lestrange’s sing-song- like baby voice calling out to her in the middle of the night.

_“Wittle baby Murphy,”_  Bellatrix would call from across the hall, taunting her _“I can hear your wittle baby whimpers. Crying for your mum, crying for your warm bed, crying for your precious Sirius.”_

_“Shut up!”_

She had the courage one night to snap back at Bellatrix, which earned her a good beating in the rec yard the next day. Bellatrix might be at large, but many of the women that ran in her gang were still stuck in Azkaban. They would eat her alive if Allie ever returned.

_Stay calm, Allie. Stay relaxed. Sirius needs you to stay calm._

“No, Minister.” she said, slightly above a whisper.

“Alright then, I’m going to ask you again and I want you to be honest. Where is Sirius Black?”

As much as she didn’t want to be sent back to prison, she’d never tell. She’d never give him up. She would spend her life in Azkaban before she gave him up. She would die before she gave him up.

“I don’t know.”

“LIAR!”

Allie jumped as Fudge slammed his palm down on the table. His face was bright red in anger; he looked like steam was about to come out of his ears. His eyes darted around angrily, roving her face for some sort of crack in her façade. He was seemingly desperate in this moment— as if everything he held dear to him was riding on finding Sirius.

“Tell me where he is!”

“I don’t know,”

“TELL ME WHERE HE IS!”

“I don’t know!”

Allie was trembling, on the verge of tears. Fudge was fed up, Dawlish looked unamused, and Kingsley was still a statue.

“Dawlish, I think Allie here needs a little assistance with talking,” Fudge said, his voice now soft and dangerous. “If you could give her some encouragement…”

Dawlish pointed his wand and the door; it slammed shut, and a flash of blue light zoomed around the door frame. Allie trembles turned to violent tremors, she knew what was coming, and she was afraid. Dawlish had put an imperturbable charm on the door, to silence her screams. She had gone through questioning with Cornelius Fudge before; she knew when he got upset, he was willing to resort to barbaric methods.

“Minister, please,” Allie whimpered “I told you I don’t know…”

White hot heat coursed through her as Dawlish flicked his wand at her. She screamed and fell out of her chair. She writhed in pain; every nerve ending in her body was on fire, her bones felt like they were snapping into pieces— but relief came just a moment later.

“Where is Sirius Black?” Fudge demanded.

“I— don’t— I don’t know,” She panted. “— I— don’t know.”

Each bout of the cruciatis curse lasted a few seconds longer than the last. Allie wasn’t sure how long she was subjected to this torture; it could’ve been 3 minutes, it could’ve been 3 hours. Either way, it was an eternity to her.

“Tell me and this will stop— where is Sirius Black?”

“I—“ her voice was weak. She was weak. She needed the pain to stop, but she would not give him up. She couldn’t give him up, even if she had wanted to— thanks to the Fidelius charm placed on 12 Grimmauld place. “— don’t know.”

“Again, Dawlish!”

“Minister—“ Kingsley’s low voice cut in “we can’t do much more of this without taking her to St. Mungo’s when we’re done. If she hasn’t talked by now, then I don’t think she knows anything.”

Fudge held his breath for a moment, then slammed his fist on the table and let out a frustrated grunt. “I knew we should’ve brought veritasserum…” he grumbled “Fine, Murphy, we’re finished for today, but make no mistake— if Sirius Black comes within 100 feet of you, we will know.”

Allie lay on the floor and breathed heavily, watching Kingsley, Fudge and Dawlish exit the suite. A moment later, Shannon came running in, helping Allie sit up.

“Allie, what happened?!” She asked “I was listening, then the door slammed shut and I couldn’t hear anything…”

“I—“ she couldn’t speak, she could hardly think. She ached down to her bones from the bouts of the cruciatis curse.

“Don’t try to talk,” Shannon said, pulling her into her lap and stroking her hair. “Just relax. It’s going to be alright…”

Shannon had a soft, caring side to her that Allie hadn’t seen before. She shut Allie up in bed, brought her tea and provisions, and informed Colleen that Allie was ill, and she would not be finishing out her shift. Colleen had tried to enter the suite demanding to see her, but Shannon was guarding Allie like a bulldog, not letting anyone near if she could help it. Allie was thankful for this, because talking about what had happened or why Fudge had paid her a visit was the last thing she wanted to do.

The sun was starting to set as Shannon brought Allie a fresh cup of tea. She handed her the steaming mug, then situated herself at the edge of the bed.

“Everyone from lunch shift is gone,” she said “no one knows you’re up here.”

Allie nodded, fidgeting with her mug. Good, she didn’t want to have to see Jack or Colleen upon leaving. The idea that it might’ve been Jack that sent in an anonymous tip to the Ministry about Sirius made her sick. She thought she had convinced him that he was seeing things, but maybe she wasn’t as persuasive as she had thought.

“Did they use the cruciatis curse on you?” Shannon asked softly, after a moment of silence.

Allie’s cheeks grew hot. She nodded again, hunching her shoulders forward and taking a small sip of her tea.

“Why did the Minister for Magic want to question you?” Shannon asked “What’s going on?”

“I can’t tell you.”

“I won’t tell anybody.”

“I still can’t tell you.”

Shannon’s chin began to quiver. After a moment, “You’re not going back to Azkaban, are you?”

The sight of her sister growing emotional caused a lump to form in Allie’s throat.

“No,” Allie shook her head “I don’t think so.”

_I hope so._

“Mum was begging to see you,” Shannon said softly “I wouldn’t let her in. I told her she’s been unfair to you, and she doesn’t get to start pretending she cares for you now.”

“She cares for me, for all of us,” Allie whispered “you know how she is when she is upset. She’s stubborn.”

“She really liked Jack;” Shannon shrugged “She was shocked when you called it off. Hell, we all were,” Shannon shifted to get a better look at Allie “Are you happy, at least? With whoever this bloke is you’re seeing now?”

“Yes,” Allie answered without hesitation “Very much so.”

Allie expected Shannon to push her to tell her all the nitty-gritty details of her relationship, but to her surprise, she did not. “You need help getting home? Or are you staying here?”

“No, I’ll go home, but I’ll have a friend come help me.”

Allie flicked her wand; a silver butterfly fluttered from her wand, and then disappeared through the wall. Shannon looked at her in awe.

“That’s so cool…” she said “I don’t understand what it is, but it’s cool…”

“Will you wait downstairs for my friend?” Allie asked “Tall, graying hair. His name is Remus.”

“Remus? Sounds handsome…” Shannon asked slyly “He the boyfriend?”

“No, not the boyfriend— just a friend.”

Remus arrived in a timely fashion. Shannon led him upstairs, but upon his arrival, he did not look surprised to see her in a weak state. Did he already know what happened?”

“You alright?” he asked

“She’s hardly alright, they—“ Shannon interjected, but Allie held her hand to silence her.

“I’m alright,” she said softly “Thank you for coming.”

Allie’s legs ached as Remus helped her along, walking back to Grimmauld place. The aftermath of the cruciatis curse was horrible— her bones felt like they would splinter with each step. She had asked to side along apparate, but Remus wasn’t sure if she were strong enough, not knowing how much torture she was subjected to.

“Kingsley is at the house;” Remus said “he told us what happened.”

“He didn’t stop it,” Allie said softly “he just watched. He sat there and watched.”

“Had he intervened, it would’ve compromised things for the Order, and for himself,” Remus explained “It’s terrible that you had to endure that today, he knows. He feels horrible.”

Allie didn’t respond. She wanted Kingsley to feel guilty. She was humiliated, and he had bared witness and didn’t do a single thing. The logical side of her brain understood why he couldn’t’ve intervened, but the emotional side was still upset that he didn’t.

“An Auror has been assigned to watch you, follow you,” Remus said “Fudge thinks Sirius will try to contact you. We got lucky, because he assigned Kingsley to the job.”

Allie didn’t feel lucky, but despite her negative feelings towards Kingsley at the moment, she knew he being assigned to tail her was better than Dawlish or another Auror not on their side. She wondered what Tonks had thought of all this. She wondered if Tonks would’ve intervened on her behalf. Even worse, she feared Tonks wouldn’t’ve, for the same reason Kingsley did not.

“Should I quit working? Should I go into hiding?”

“No,” Remus said without hesitation “That would be suspicious. You need to carry on as normal as possible. Give Kingsley boring things to report.”

* * *

 

Sirius felt like he was going to vomit. He clutched his glass of firewhisky so tightly that his knuckles were turning white, trying to control the anger and frustration he felt.

“You let them torture her.” he said quietly.

“I couldn’t intervene,” Kingsley said, his expression pained “Had I, it would’ve compromised so much—“

“I know!” Sirius snapped. He took a deep breath, speaking calmer now “I know. But I am still angry it happened,”

Silence fell between them for another couple minutes. He kept glancing at the clock on the wall; Remus had been gone an awfully long time. It had seemed like ages ago that Allie’s butterfly fluttered into the kitchen, asking for Remus to escort her back home.

“Shouldn’t Remus be back by now?”

The door opened above them, and footsteps thudded above. Sirius downed the rest of his firewhisky in one gulp, and made to stand.

“Speak of the devil…”

He bolted up the stairs, Kingsley close behind him. Remus and Allie were standing in the foyer, she gripping his bicep for support and he holding her upright by the waist. Sirius’s heart leapt; he wanted to sweep her up and pepper her in kisses and apologies for the torture she had endured today.

Allie flushed and looked down at the floor. He wasn’t sure if her embarrassment was coming from him staring, or because Kingsley was here.

“Do you need help getting upstairs?” Remus asked, cutting the silence.

She nodded. Sirius ran forward, seizing her waist on the other side.

“I’ve got her, Moony— thank you.”

They were silent as Sirius helped her upstairs and into the bedroom. He sat her down at the edge of the bed, murmuring apologies when she let out a strangled groan.

“You want help changing into something more comfortable? Or think you can manage?”

At that, Allie buried her face in her hands and began to sob. Sirius kneeled in front of her, gently rubbing her upper arms.

“shhh, it’s alright,” he whispered “it’s over now…”

“But it’s not over,” she said, her words muffled through her hands “They will be watching me, trying to find you.”

“Kingsley will be watching,” Sirius corrected, “and he’s on our side.”

“He watched,” Allie whimpered, pulling her hands away to reveal her red, patchy face soaked in tears “He just sat there and watched.”

“I know, he couldn’t intervene. You understand why he couldn’t?”

“Yes,” She wiped her face roughly “but that doesn’t change how humiliated I am.”

Sirius nodded; he wasn’t sure what to say about that. He couldn’t imagine how she felt.

“What can I do for you?” he asked “How can I make you feel better? Even just a little bit?”

“I just want to go to bed.”

Sirius nodded, giving her upper arms a gentle squeeze. “Alright.”

She pointed to the dresser “Can you hand me a t shirt?”

“Of course,” he grabbed one of his old tees from the top drawer of his dresser and handed it to her. “You need help?”

“Just with my skirt,” she said softly “It hurts to stand on my own.”

She slipped her blouse off over her head. When she reached around to unclasp her bra, she winced.

“Here, let me,”

Sirius sat next to her and unclasped her bra. He gently slid the straps off her shoulders, the backs of his fingers brushing against her smooth skin.

“Would you like a shoulder rub?”

She nodded. He began gently kneading her, careful not to massage too hard and hurt her. He worked all over the tops of her shoulders and her upper arms, then placed his palms on her ribcage and stripped between her shoulder blades with his thumbs. His fingertips brushed against the side of her breasts; her skin was silk here. He felt the urge to reach around and cup her breasts, to feel her nipples stiffen under his touch, to hear her breathing hitch from touching an intimate area, but he refrained. He didn’t know if she was too sore to shag, and he felt it most likely rude to ask.

“Put your arms above your head.”

He slid the t shirt on her, then unzipped the skirt from the back and moved in front of her. He slid her skirt off, fighting his tingling erection in his pants. God, if only she were feeling better…

“Will you hold me? Until I fall asleep?” she asked

“Of course.”

They lay down, she curling up against his chest and draping one of her legs over his. He gently drew circles on her back, listening to her breathing patterns to know when she was asleep. Right as he thought she was drifting off she whispered, so softly he wondered if he imagined it.

“I love you.”

He kissed the top of her head, her curls soft and pillow-y, and whispered back.

“I love you, too. More than you know. More than you could understand.”


	14. 14

Allie had grown quiet. Well, quieter, he reckoned— he hadn’t forgotten how quiet she normally was around others. She had flourished around him, opened up and grown comfortable; However since her meeting with the Minister, she had retreated back inside herself.

She wasn’t cold, just quiet. She told him good morning with soft kisses to his forehead or cheek, rather than speak. She still spent afternoons on the drawing room’s couch with him, albeit silently curled up next to him with a book. The silence didn’t bother Sirius, however— because while she held a book in one hand, she held his hand in another.

A garden had appeared out back. The once dead and weed-y flowerbed was replaced with beautiful thatches of tulips, marigolds and zinnias. She seemed at peace gardening without magic, unbothered by the sun beating down on her. Sirius didn’t mind sitting out in the late spring heat watching her dig and tend to her florals, for if she was happy, he was happy.

He also didn’t mind when she would beckon for him to join her in the shower, either. As quiet as she had become, she was not quiet in the shower.

She whimpered in her sleep, muttering to herself as she thrashed about. It wasn’t every night, but more often than not Sirius was awoken from a deep sleep to her crying out.

_I’ll never tell. I’ll never tell._

He didn’t dare ask her during waking hours what she had been dreaming about; fearing he already knew the answer. She had been subjected to torture on more than one account because of him, and his guilt was easier concealed if he didn’t speak of it.

The drawing room became a room of secrets. Remus and Tonks seemed to be shutting themselves inside (conversations muted by an imperturbable charm) more and more. Each time they would exit, Tonks looked frustrated, and Remus looked sad.

Molly had spent nearly an hour one afternoon with Allie in there, door shut and conversation muted. Sirius knew Molly muted it because of him, and despite the spell being airtight, he had sat outside the door straining to listen. Judging by the pleasant expressions and Molly’s genuine hug to Allie when she left 12 Grimmauld Place that evening, whatever they spoke of went well.

Even Kingsley had stopped by the house one night and pulled Allie aside. Sirius didn’t sit by the door and try to listen this time, already knowing what Kingsley and she would be speaking about. Allie had walked Kingsley to the front door and shook his hand goodbye; all seemed well between them.

With Kingsley having left shortly before, the house was quiet and mostly empty. Sirius, Remus and Allie sat at the basement table, enjoying left over pasta Molly had made the day previous.

“So, you and Kingsley kissed and made up?”

Sirius’s words were muffled by a mouthful of pasta, quickly washed down with a swig of scotch.

Allie flushed and nodded “Something like that.”

“Have you seen him? Following you?” Remus asked

“No,” Allie shook her head “he said he doesn’t watch me like he’s supposed to. He’s watching others, wouldn’t tell me who.”

“Probably Malfoy or some other Death Eater.” Sirius grumbled.

For a few minutes, the only sound in the house was forks scraping against plates. It was almost eerily quiet, Sirius thought; the same quiet that used to drive him mad.

“Where is Kreacher?” Remus asked “I haven’t seen him the last few times I’ve been here.”

“I haven’t seen him either— have you seen him skulking about, kitten?”

Allie shook her head.

“Ehhh the hell with him,” Sirius waved his hand, scoffing “He’s probably skulking around in the attic, fawning over my mother’s old junk.”

They ate for another few minutes in silence. Remus had turned his attention to a book; Lord of the Flies— he must’ve found it on the table in the drawing room. Sirius watched Allie eat out of the corner of his eye; she was so lovely, he could hardly believe for the last two months she had been his. He watched as she swallowed, watching her throats mini-movements just underneath her skin. His cock twitched thinking of his lips on the hollow of her throat, her soft moans in his ear.

He slid his hand over her thigh, brow raised and grinning mischievously. She flushed and bit her lip to keep from smiling, then glanced at the clock.

“Don’t let me forget to place another contraceptive at 7:00,” she whispered, as softly as she could.

“I heard that,” Remus said, overtop of his book “You could have the decency to wait until I’m gone befo—“

“Alright, you lot!”

Tonks came barging inside the kitchen; Sirius had been so distracted he hadn’t heard her come in the front door. Her hair was jet black this evening, long with small streaks of red framing her heart-shaped face. She threw a deck of cards onto the table, grinning.

“We’re playing cards and getting drunk tonight!”

“Rough day…?” Remus asked inquisitively

“This house will be full of kids in a few weeks once school lets out, and this is the last weekend all of us don’t have guard duty,” Tonks said “Come on, I’ll get us all some shots of firewhisky...”

Sirius leaned over to Remus, whispering.

“Is she trying to kill us?”

Remus set the book down, shrugging.

“Probably.”

It didn’t take all that many drinks before the four of them were having a good time. Remus, Tonks and Sirius played Blackjack at the kitchen table as Allie twirled and swayed to the music behind them. She was much more carefree when she was tipsy, although alcohol did not make her any more chatty than usual.

“Kitten, are you going to come learn Blackjack?” Sirius called back to her “Or are you going to pretend to be a ballerina all night?”

“I _was_ a ballerina,” she slurred sweetly “as a child. Until I was 9.”

She did not join them. She moved to the music, her curls bouncing and splaying around her as she moved. For a drunken woman, she was quite graceful.

“Moony, how many shots of tequila can you do?” Sirius asked, clasping his hands together

“In succession?” Remus asked, furrowing his brow “ah, I don’t know—”

“Five?” Sirius flicked his wand, and a bottle of tequila and ten shot glasses zoomed over to the table. Five lined up in front of Remus, five in front of Sirius. He poured their row of shots, spilling some of the liquor onto the table. “First one to puke loses…”

“Padfoot,” Remus held his hand up in protest, albeit snickering in amusement. “We’re not 19 anymore, drinking in James’s basement…”

“No, we’re 35 and drinking in mine!” Sirius grinned, raising his first shot to toast Remus “Bottoms up!”

Sirius kicked back all 5 shots, and then shook his head furiously. The liquid scorched his throat and burnt all the way down his esophagus. He whooped as he slammed his palm on the table. The liquid in Remus’s glasses splashed over the edges.

“ _Damn_ that’s good! Your turn, Moony!”

Remus eyed the line of shots nervously, and then sighed heavily.

“Against my better judgement…”

He knocked back the five shots as quick as Sirius did, coughing and choking on the last one. Sirius clapped his hands wildly as he laughed.

“You were _always_ a pussy when it came to tequila.”

Remus clutched his chest with one hand as he coughed, and gave Sirius a crude gesture with the other. Tonks rose from the table suddenly, grabbing Allie’s hand and dragging her up the kitchen stairs.

“Allie, you would look _so_ pretty with eyeliner…”

“Uhh…”

“You’re going to love it! Come on!”

Allie shot Sirius a nervous glance before she disappeared up the stairs and out of sight. Remus flopped a pack of cigarettes onto the table.

“Well, I need a smoke, care to join me?”

“Since when have you started smoking again? I thought you quit after we graduated.”

“Eh, I’ve smoked on and off the past 15 years,” Remus waved his hand dismissively “nasty habit really, but it helps with stress.”

It was beginning to rain outside. The men stood on the top step of the front stoop, watching the small raindrops darkening on the concrete walkway. They were just within the confines of the Fidelius charm, here; it was almost empowering to know that the muggles walking up and down the sidewalk a few yards in front of them couldn’t see or hear them. They took long, slow drags of their cigarettes; Sirius didn’t remember just how fowl the taste of cigarettes were. He hadn’t been much older than 17 since the last time he had had one. He and James never smoked as much as Remus had, mostly only smoking when they had been drinking. They had kicked cigarettes to the curb when Lily started throwing a fit about it.

 _“You lot always smell like an ashtray!”_ She would say _“It’s a filthy habit!”_

“I swear these things tasted better 20 years ago.” Sirius laughed, choking on a bit of smoke.

“There’s no way you even remember what these taste like. You were always 8 drinks deep before you smoked anything.”

“Well, I’m _more_ than 8 drinks deep now, and these—“ he held up his cigarette “—taste like shit.”

The men laughed, and there was a natural pause in the conversation. They stood there for a minute, listening to the rain starting to pitter-patter harder before Remus spoke again.

“You seem happy,” Remus said, after a moment. “Allie seems happy.”

“I can’t speak for her, but I’m happy,” Sirius said, shrugging and taking a drag off his cigarette “She’s made this house more bearable to be in.”

“I’m sorry,” he said, looking off ahead of them rather than at Sirius “I’m sorry I’ve chastised you for so much this past year. I haven’t been the best friend lately.”

“We’ve been through more shit together than most, Remus,” Sirius said “even if you’re pissing me off you are a brother to me.”

Remus smiled slightly, “the wiser, more sensible brother.”

“Oh, of course,” Sirius grinned “Always the sensible one.”

They laughed, and another pause fell between them. The rain began pouring harder, and the breeze picked up. After a moment,

“What brought this on?”

The smile faded from Remus’s face, replaced with a heavy expression. He took a long drag off his cigarette, seeming like he was pondering what to say when the front door burst open.

“Oi! There you two are!” Tonks cried “Check out my masterpiece!”

Allie’s lips were bright red, and eyes heavily rimmed and smoked with black eyeliner. Tonks had cut up one of Sirius’s already hole-y t-shirts, distressing it and showcasing her cleavage.

“Doesn’t she look like one of those chicks that tour around with the Weird Sisters? The ones that go to all their shows?”

“Groupies?” Remus chuckled.

“Yeah, those!”

“She does, kind of,” Sirius murmured, winking at Allie. “Hottest groupie I’ve ever seen.”

She flushed tomato red. She eyed his cigarette; he expected her to chastise him for smoking when instead she plucked the cigarette from his fingers. His eyebrows rose into his hairline as he watched her take a drag, cough, and then grimace.

“That’s bloody disgusting,” she muttered under her breath. “I don’t see the appeal.”

She handed him back the half-smoked cigarette, and disappeared inside the house, Tonks on her heels. Remus and Sirius looked at each other with deadpan expressions, and then burst out laughing.

“Well, wasn’t expecting that.”

Back in the basement kitchen, Allie was now showcasing her childhood ballet skills on top of the table, while Tonks was back in the pantry rummaging for junk food. (“Where’s all the licorice wands?!”). Sirius ran to the table, outstretching his arms to catch her if she fell.

 “Allie, you need to be careful—“

Just as he spoke, she stumbled. She cracked her tailbone on the table as Sirius caught her under the arms, preventing her from falling head first onto the concrete floor. She let out a loud, drunken cackle, leaning all her weight back into Sirius. He struggled to pull her off the table and set her down without her getting hurt again, but managed. She wrapped her arms around him and clung to him, using him to hold herself up.

“You about broke your neck—“

“But I didn’t,” she slurred, burying her head into the crook of his neck “You were here to catch me.”

Sirius wrapped an arm around her waist, supporting her and holding her upright. “And I thought I was the irresponsible one…” he whispered under his breath.

He looked to his left, surprised to see Tonks and Remus were snogging in the middle of the kitchen.

“Is this really happening…?” he muttered to Allie out of the corner of his mouth.

“Uh huh!” She let out a giggle, then leaned in and whispered in his ear “Let’s give them some privacy.”

They stumbled up the few flights of stairs, struggling to contain their laughter as the moved past the temperamental portrait of Mrs. Black. Once in the bedroom, Allie clumsily kicked her jeans off, and then flopped onto the bed.

“The room is spinning,” she grumbled into her pillow. “Make it stop…”

Sirius lay next to her, propping himself on his side with his elbow.

“I think you’re drunker than I am, and I’ve had twice as much as you.”

She turned her head to look at him; her eyes were glassy and unfocused “I’m a lightweight.”

“Oh really? I couldn’t tell…”

If she had blushed, he couldn’t tell. Her face was now in a permanent state of flush from all the alcohol she had consumed. He let her lay here for a few minutes, stroking her back gently as she periodically groaned about the spinning room.

“I feel like we should have some pillow talk, while we’re unfiltered— thanks to alcohol…” Sirius grinned wryly, chuckling as he leaned in and whispered in her ear. “Tell me your deepest, darkest secret.”

“You’re stupid,” she slurred, but she was smiling. “Well, everyone knows I cheated on my fiancé. What they don’t know, is with _whom.”_

Sirius played along, grinning even wider “Oh yeah? Who’s that? A devilishly handsome bloke?”

“A _mass murderer_ ,” Allie looked at him with a deadpan expression “killed _thirteen_ people—one of which the only thing left of him was a finger.”

“Oh ho!” Sirius cried, laughing heartily “Think you’re funny, do you?”

“I know I’m funny,” she giggled, chewing her bottom lip “Your turn.”

“My deepest _darkest_ secret? Well, that would have to be the thoughts I’ve had of you.”

Allie shifted to look at him better, her expression a mix of lust and curiosity. “Do tell.”

“It’s not polite to speak of such dirty, _filthy_ things in front of a lady…”

“I see…” her eyes flashed at him. “You could show me, then.”

“Oh, certainly— I’d be _delighted_ to show you.”

He pulled his shirt off, then moved behind her and pulled her panties down with a quick yank. She clumsily shook them off one leg, allowing them to pool at her knee of the other. He pulled her butt up in the air and ran his fingers along her slit, slick and ready. A glorious view this was, able to stare down the barrel of her back, admiring her porcelain white rump. He pushed his index finger into her, chuckling as she let out a soft squeak. His free hand smacked her asscheek; she was caught off guard, shooting upward. Sirius caught her around the waist, continuing his rhythm inside her. They both were positioned on their knees, her back pressed against his chest as he gripped her to him. He kissed just below her earlobe, whispering in her ear huskily.

 “Did Jack ever spank you, kitten?”

“No, he— he never—”

“Did you like it?”

“I—“ her breath caught in her throat as he transitioned from one finger to two. She let out a soft moan before she was able to speak again “—yes, I— yes.”

His hand roamed from her waist up to her breast, then up into her hair and gripped at the nape. He kissed her neck, pulling her head back to expose her throat to him.

“Oh, the things I can show you… The things I can do to you…” he growled in her ear “I know ways to make you come harder than you ever have before…”

His words seem to push her over the edge. Her body tensed, her back arched, and her body shuddered.

“That’s it, good girl, let go…”

She came with a sharp cry. He held her upright, not allowing her to collapse from her orgasm, but instead allowing her to lean back into him. He released her hair and pulled his fingers out. While she came down from her high, he suckled from her earlobe to her shoulder and slid his hands up to caress her breasts.

“Lay down.” She whispered, after a moment.

He obliged, moving to lie down onto his back. She unbuttoned his jeans slowly, and then yanked both them and his boxers down, his cock springing out. She swung her leg over and sunk down onto him.

“It’s my turn to make you feel good.” She whispered.

Oh, and that she did. She was so wet, so good; Sirius gripped her hips and guided her up and down, relishing in the gorgeous little pleasure sounds she made.

The rain now pounded on the window, the wind howling through the trees outside. She drove her hips down strong, taking control of their pleasure with her angle and speed. The faster she moved, the closer he got to losing himself inside of her.

“I’m so close,” She moaned “Come with me, Sirius, come with me.”

That alone was enough to set him over the edge. He slammed into her with a strangled grunt as he spilled every last drop inside her. Her body shuddered over him, her nails scratching down his chest as she threw her head back and let out another pleasurable cry.

The best part of sex was the after. Simply laying skin to skin, holding each other and caressing each other’s skin was better than anything else he had ever experienced.

When he escaped Azkaban, he swam miles through the cold, thrashing sea to what he thought was freedom. He had spent most of the last nearly 3 years feeling that freedom was a façade— feeling still like the prisoner who spent 12 years in a 9x9 cell.

But being with her was different. Something about her awakened and uplifted him. Something about her embrace comforted him beyond anything he had ever known before. He no longer felt trapped when she was with him. With her, especially right now in her arms, he truly felt free.


	15. 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We're going to step into Allie's perspective again for the second part of the chapter!

“I am _never_ drinking again.”

Allie groaned as she folded her arms on the table, and laid her head against them. Sirius looked over his shoulder and smiled at her; poor thing looked absolutely miserable.

“Don’t you worry, kitten— I’m making you my special hangover cure breakfast.”

The kitchen smelled of bacon, eggs and pancakes as Sirius fried up the greasiest, heartiest breakfast he could manage. He had two glasses of Bloody Marys sitting off to the side, awaiting vodka. The bacon sizzled as he flipped all the stove burners to the off position. The bacon grease popped, a small droplet flew up and hit the back of his hand, scorching his flesh. He flailed his hand, muttering expletives under his breath.

“Alright, food’s ready, now for just—“

He reached for a bottle of vodka, now realizing there was none left after last night. He combed through the bottles; _Scotch, firewhisky, tequila, rum—_ He stopped and went back to the tequila. There was just enough for their two glasses. _Looks like we’re having Bloody Marias instead._

“Here you are!”

He delivered a heaping plate of food, as well as the breakfast cocktail to her. She grabbed the glass, sniffed it, and then scoffed.

“You made me a Bloody Mary?” she groaned “I don’t even like tomato juice.”

 “Bloody _Maria_. You need a bit of Hair of the Dog to combat that nasty hangover.”

She looked between him, the cocktail and the plate of food with obvious disdain before taking a bite of her bacon.

“Why aren’t you dying of a hangover?” she asked “you drank more than me.”

“ehh, I’m not exactly fixing to run a marathon today, but I obviously can process my alcohol better than you can.” He sat down across from her and took a large sip of his drink. “So, I was thinking. What about swiping some of Moody’s polyjuice again and taking a stroll into Diagon Alley? I want to see Fred and George’s new place. Molly bellyached the other day about them buying a storefront— lord only knows where they came up with the mon—“

“Sirius,” she interrupted softly “You know I can’t take you into Diagon Alley.”

He knew she would refuse, but he had hoped she wouldn’t. He hoped after a wild night of drinking and shagging that she would still be on a rebellious streak, but he knew she wouldn’t be. He knew that once she sobered up, she wouldn’t be willing to risk it.

But how wonderful it would’ve been to stroll through Diagon Alley— sun beating on their necks, ice cream cones from Florean Fortescue’s melting and dripping down their hands as they rushed to eat. Luxuries of a free man, he reckoned.

“Bloody Marys?”

Tonks entered the kitchen looking just as sickly and hungover as Allie did. She grimaced at the sight of her cocktail.

“ugh, I _never_ want to smell alcohol again…”

“A bit of Hair of the Dog is the best thing for a hangover!” Sirius said “and it’s a Bloody Maria, technically.”

“Because that makes it better,” Tonks rolled her eyes “I’ll make a hangover potion.”

Tonks rummaged the cabinets for a pewter cauldron and ingredients, and got to work. Allie slowly picked at her breakfast, snubbing her nose as Sirius would push her cocktail towards her.

“Where’s Remus?” Sirius asked through a mouthful of bacon “Last I saw him you two were snogging here in the kitchen.

Tonks’s expression fell as she stirred the potion counter clockwise. “He left early this morning.”

“You shag last night? Merlin only knows Moony could use—“

“That’s none of your business!” Tonks snapped.

Tears welled up in her eyes as she threw her potion ladle down. Allie placed a hand on Tonks’s back, rubbing gently as she buried her face into her hands. Allie looked at Sirius and frowned.

“Sirius, could you give Tonks and me some privacy?”

He was about to protest when Allie’s eyes beckoned him once more to go. He eyed both women for a moment before nodding stiffly, and then made to exit. He went straight into the drawing room and began rummaging around drawers for one of Fred and George’s extendable ears. He found one covered in dust in the back of the drawer, silently thanking Molly for confiscating this one and hiding it in this drawer.

He stood at the top of the kitchen stairs and dropped the extendable ear down far enough to pick up on Allie and Tonks’s conversation.

_“— left without a note, left without saying goodbye. I woke up at half past 6 and he was just gone.”_

_“Did he have somewhere he had to be? A mission for the Order?”_

_“Not that I know of, but wouldn’t you think after a night of shagging he’d at least tell me goodbye?”_

_“I don’t know…”_

_“I love him. I’ve fallen in love with him and he hates himself so much he can’t let himself be loved. He tells me he’s no good for me, tells me he’s too old, poor and dangerous.”_

_“Dangerous as in he’s worried he may bite you? May transform and hurt you?”_

_“I guess, but he’s always locked himself away so I don’t see the issue.”_

_“Do you know if he feels the same way you do? Or is he using his condition as an excuse to not be honest?”_

_“If you saw the way he looked at me, kissed me, touched me— he does. I’ve had my fair share of casual sex. Last night was not casual. I mean, he literally was—”_

Sirius reeled in the extendable ear— he didn’t want to hear any more of Tonks and Remus’s wild night. He returned the extendable ear to its drawer and paced around the drawing room until he felt an acceptable amount of time had passed. For some reason, he had the nagging feeling he had forgotten something, but couldn’t place his finger on it. He wasn’t sure how he could forget something when he spent every moment of his existence inside the house.

Returning to the kitchen, the girls seemed much perkier than when he left. Tonks now smiled at him, holding out a goblet containing a shimmering peach liquid.

“Hangover potion?” Tonks offered “trust me, it worked much better than your hodge-podge cocktail over there.”

“Hodge-podge?” Sirius scoffed, yet smiled and pointed to Allie’s untouched cocktail. “That is quality bartending right there!”

Tonks stayed for a few hours before insisting she needed to head home.

“If any of you see Remus,” she had said as she rose from the table “Tell him I’d like to speak with him.”

Sirius and Allie then spent the afternoon in the backyard, Allie tending to her flowerbeds as Sirius sat back and read today’s Daily Prophet. The front page depicted his arrest mugshot, headline reading,

**Manhunt for Sirius Black continues; 10,000 Galleons on his head**

“Can you believe this, kitten?” he had called to her “I’m only worth 10,000 galleons to ol’ Fudge. I figured a scapegoat like me would be worth at least 20!”

They’d come inside for a cup of tea, but found themselves upstairs rolling around in between the sheets instead. Sirius now watched Allie from his bed, admiring how her skin was illuminated with a golden orange glow as she sat in the windowsill, looking out into the front courtyard of Grimmauld place. She looked peaceful, like something you would see out of a muggle painting. She sat with a notebook in her lap, tapping her quill’s feather against her cheek as she seemed to be contemplating what to write next.

She wore an old shirt of his— a habit she had developed after they would shag. This one was an old purple Weird Sisters t-shirt, moth eaten at the bottom hem, but she didn’t seem to mind. Her panties were nearly the exact shade of her skin, giving the illusion she wasn’t wearing any. He admired her from her from her perfectly polished toes up to her wild mane of frizzed curls; she was the most beautiful sight he’d ever seen.

She continued to tap her quill feather against her cheek, staring outside and lost in thought. She did this weekly, crafting letters to send to her siblings Rory, Bridget and Teagan while they were away at school. Sirius found it curious how close she seemed with her younger siblings. She send them the most lengthy of letters each week, and they responded with letters of equal length and detail. He never had that with his brother; they were too different. They lived in the same house, but were more like acquaintances than family.

“What are you thinking about so hard over there?”

“I’m trying to think of some advice to give Rory;” she said “he’s been dealing with bullies,”

Sirius shifted awkwardly; _bullies— s_ ensitive subject. To his surprise, she looked at him and gave him a small smile.

“Any advice?”

“Er—“ he coughed awkwardly, caught off guard that she would be asking _him_ for tips, especially after their disagreement on his teenage behavior. “Tell him to stand up for himself. Push back. If he’s not an easy target, they’ll eventually lay off.”

She smiled more and nodded, then continued to scribble. Sirius hoped telling the boy to push back wouldn’t earn him an arse beating if the bullies were twice his size.

“So, you are pretty close with your siblings,”

She nodded.

“But you never mention your other brother, though.”

“What about him?”

Allie did not look up from her letter, but Sirius could see a change of expression from behind her eyes at the mention of her other brother.

“I just don’t know much about him, that’s all. You talk about the others so much, I feel like I know them quite well at this point.”

“Flynn left home after he graduated. No one has seen or heard from him since,” she shrugged “so there isn’t much to say.”

“Do you know why he left?”

Allie looked up, frowning. “Mum and he got into it.”

Fighting with Colleen Murphy seemed to be a trend amongst Allie and her siblings, Sirius thought, but kept this thought to himself.

“What happened?”

Allie took a deep breath, and set her letter aside. It took her a moment to gather her thoughts before she spoke.

“Flynn was… different. Always was. He and I were close as kids, but once he was in school and found his own friends, he changed. Then Dad left, and it got worse.” She paused for a moment. “He never liked Shannon. They got into it over her.”

“Because she’s chatty?”

Allie shook her head “Because she is a squib.”

Tears started to well up in her eyes, and her chin started to quiver. She clenched her hands into fists and took another deep breath, and continued.

“Flynn was embarrassed to have a squib sister. He said something foul to Shannon over dinner, and he and mum got into a screaming match. It was terrible. He said some horrible things to and about her. I think Shannon cried for a week straight,” Allie wiped a stray tear from her cheek. “He packed his stuff that night and left. Haven’t seen him since.”

“I’m sorry,” Sirius said softly. He wasn’t sure what to say, he was never particularly good at family matters. He offered up the only bit of information he thought might make her feel better. “My brother and I were very different, too.”

Allie’s face and neck were now red and patchy. She wiped her cheeks roughly and sniffled. “Will you tell me about him? Regulus, it was?”

Sirius nodded, and rolled over onto his back so he could look at the ceiling. “He was my parent’s better son, as I was reminded constantly. He shared their bullshit pureblood views, and ended up becoming a Death Eater when he was 16.”

“Was there any time you two were close?”

“No,” Sirius said softly “I hated the lot of them— despised them and their views from an early age.” They were silent for a moment. “I didn’t know what it was like to love someone until I went off to Hogwarts. Once I was sorted into Gryffindor and met James, Remus and Peter, they became my family.”

A twinge of anger stirred inside him as he spoke Peter’s name. He was ashamed that he had ever loved the filthy rat traitor like a brother— if only he knew then what he knew now.

“Were you upset when Regulus decided to serve him?”

He understood the ‘him’ meant Voldemort. Allie never flinched at his name, but rarely spoke it herself.

“I wasn’t surprised in the slightest, so I don’t think upset is the proper word. I always knew he would join the ranks of Death Eaters. My parents were so proud, despite not being ones themselves.” he scoffed “Nutters, the lot of ‘em.”

“I’m sure they thought the same of you.”

They both took a moment, and then broke out into laughter. The tension in the room eased slightly.  

“Yeah, kitten, I’m sure they did.”

She smiled, then picked her letter back up and continued to write. Curiosity gnawed at him; he now knew why her brother left, but he wondered what happened to her father.

“What about your dad?” he asked

Allie did not look up from her letter. “I don’t know. Flynn and I came home for the Christmas holiday and he was gone. Mum was a wreck and wouldn’t speak of it. To this day she won’t speak of it.”

He had nothing to offer to this sentiment. He felt thick, not knowing the right thing to say or do.

“I’m sorry.” He said finally.

She looked up, her sad eyes returning.

“Me too.”

* * *

 

June brought leaves to the trees, instead of the various blossoms of spring. Allie would’ve liked to be able to walk home from work to enjoy the summer foliage and lovely weather, but she had been forced to apparate directly in and out of 12 Grimmauld place, thanks to Fudge’s paranoia.

She apparated into the foyer, and made her way into the backyard to water her garden. The flowers were blooming magnificently; her rose bushes were flourishing better than she could've hoped for mid-June. The backyard seemed to have had life breathed into it once a living plant started to actually grow back there.

Most of the townhomes of Grimmauld Place had extremely small backyards, fenced in with 12-ft partitions, but thanks to magic, Number 12 had a much larger space. The grassy area had been expanded into the perfect size for dueling, and Sirius had tripled Allie’s garden space. They had tried to repair the concrete patio, but failed. Reparo was not a strong enough spell, and neither of them was too familiar with construction magic to know any better way to repair it. They did however put out a nice patio table, chairs and an umbrella; a lovely place for Sirius to sit and read while Allie tended to the florals. It had become their summer routine, replacing tea on the couch in the drawing room, and she loved it.

If he were to be stuck inside the property lines of this house, she wanted it to be as nice as it could be. She considered getting a muggle wading pool and enlarging it for adults, as a nice place to cool down when the temperatures grew warmer than they already were. Once the backyard became an enjoyable place for him, she would focus on cleaning up the inside.

She wanted to scrub the corroded, grimy windows until the sparkled. She wanted to tear down the wretched wallpaper and paint the house with something less drab. She hoped she could find a counter for a permanent sticking charm, so they could haul out the portrait of Mrs. Black. All of this required money, unfortunately. Money she didn’t have. She didn’t think Sirius would want to dump his own money into the house he hated so much, but she felt if they fixed it up and made it look new, he maybe wouldn’t hate it so much.

She returned back inside and made her way upstairs and into their bedroom. She pulled out a pair of jeans and a tank top, setting them on top of the dresser. She couldn’t wait to get into the shower, to scrub the kitchen grease and sweat off of her that she had accumulated over the course of her shift.

"Hey there," Sirius appeared in the doorway, leaning against the frame, smirking at her. "How was it?"

"Fine, just another day at work."

He stepped inside as she shut the dresser drawer. She felt his hands on her waist as he leaned forward, pinning her hips to the dresser. He nuzzled his face into her neck, kissing her just below the earlobe softly.

"I missed you today," he murmured against her skin. His hands slid up and cupped her breasts. He squeezed, and she nearly went through the roof.

"Ah!" she cried out "Easy...!"

"Mm, sorry," Gave her shoulder a quick peck, and then stepped away. "Tits sore today?"

She gently rubbed her breasts, wincing at their tenderness. "Just a little."

He flopped down onto the bed, folding his hands behind his head. “Must be about to start your period."

Allie froze; how long had it been exactly since her last period? She should be due any day now. She wasn't someone who was exactly on time every month, but she certainly should've started by now. She started counting the weeks mentally. _One, two, five... six...?_  She felt her face flush as panic set in— had it really been 6 weeks? No, maybe she was mistaken. If it had been that long, then she was...

"Sorry, I didn’t mean to embarrass you," Sirius laughed "every woman bleeds, kitten— it’s nothing to be worked up over."

"Oh, yeah," she said quickly, "no big deal. I— I'm going to have a shower."

He sat up abruptly, a boyish grin plastered to his face. “Shower? Care for some company? I'll wash your back for you."

"No, no, I'll only be a minute— I’ll be back"

She bolted out of the room before he could protest. She slammed the bathroom door shut and turned the shower on cold. She shed her clothes and stepped inside, yelping as the cold water hit her skin. She wanted that to happen; she needed to shock the panic out of her system.

_It'll start any day now, you've never been regular. There's no need to panic._

She slid a bar of soap over her skin, repeating this over and over to herself. Her mind kept counting the weeks, racing around dates, times, instances. They had been careful; there was no need to worry. They had always used a contraceptive charm—

Her heart nearly stopped. They had _almost_ always used a contraceptive charm, except for the night of Tonks's little booze fest. She now remembered sitting at the table, specifically telling Sirius to not let her forget to place another contraceptive. It was shortly after that that they had begun drinking, and she had forgotten all about it until this moment.

No, no she couldn't be. What would be the odds of her getting pregnant only after one time? Many couples had to try nearly half a dozen times before it would happen to them. She didn't feel different, she wasn't sick like her mother had gotten during the pregnancies Allie had remembered.

But her breasts were sore. She did remember her mother saying once that that was the first indicator she received when she was pregnant. But surely, it had to be a coincidence. Her breasts would get sore before she started her period each month, so that’s all this had to be. She was late, yes, but she’d been late before. She would surely start any day now. No need to panic.

She rinsed out her shampoo, then took a large glob of conditioner and ran it though her hair, combing her curls with her fingers. It always took a boatload of conditioner to keep some of her frizz down.

She about went through the ceiling when the bathroom door burst open.

 "Allie, get out of the shower, we have to go."

Sirius’s tone was sharp, urgent. He was panting, as if he had ran all the way down the long hallway.

"Go where? What’s happening?"

She started panicking once more. What was wrong? Did the ministry find him? Was he about to get captured?

"Snape sent a patronus; Harry had a vision that Voldemort was holding me at the Ministry, so he and the other kids are going on a mission to try to save me. It’s a trap, so they can get their hands on the weapon."

"Oh my god," she shook her hair roughly to rinse the remaining conditioner out, and turned the water off. She ripped the shower curtain open and grabbed a towel, drying off quickly. "Do the others know?"

Just then, they heard the front door open, and footsteps from the floor below.

"Looks like it," he said "come on, we need to go now."

She was dressed and they were down the stairs barely a minute later. Remus, Tonks, Moody and Kingsley all stood in the foyer, concerned expressions plastered to their faces.

"Let's go!" Moody ordered "there is no telling how long the kids have been there already— join hands!"

Allie frowned at Sirius as he reached for her hand.

"Sirius, you can't leave the house."

"I'm not leaving my godson in danger. I'm coming. End of discussion."

She wanted to protest, but didn’t and took his hand anyway. The air was forced from her lungs just for a split second, and then she opened her eyes to find them standing in front of an old abandoned telephone booth on a lonely muggle street

"Everyone, inside!" Moody called.

They stepped inside, the booth magically expanding to fit all occupants. Kingsley dialed a few numbers on the rotary phone. A disembodied voice spoke inside the booth, as if there was another person standing inside with them.

_“Welcome to the Ministry of Magic's visitors entrance. Please state your names and business.”_

"Alastor Moody, Kingsley Shacklebolt, Nymphadora Tonks, Remus Lupin, Sirius Black and Allison Murphy here on official business"

_“Thank you. Please attach visitor’s nametags to the front of your robes.”_

The booth spit out name tags for each of them. Allie looked at hers and almost laughed. _Allison Murphy, Official Business._

The phone booth lowered like an elevator, down many stories into the ground. Allie felt like her stomach was in her throat; she looked at Sirius, seemingly calm and collected, wondering if he were as much a pile of nerves as she was. If he was, he didn’t show it. His face appeared to be etched in stone, carved into a brave, formidable expression. He turned to her, his expression softening when he surely noticed the fear in her eyes. He reached out and took her hand, squeezing it gently. She held his hand tightly, holding onto him for reassurance. The lift stopped and the doors opened, the disembodied voice speaking once more.

_“Level 8, Atrium.”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Uh oh, the dreaded Battle of the Department of Mysteries! We have a lot of action coming up; Stay tuned!


	16. 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sooooo, I considered changing the archive warning to 'Graphic Depictions of Violence' to be on the safe side, but honestly, I didn't think this chapter was all that graphic. So I decided not to.
> 
> However, there is mentions of blood and a few descriptors around injuries, so if you are really _really_ that squeamish, here is your warning. But really, its not bad. If it is, you may yell at me.

As the telephone booth slowly descended underground, Sirius noticed Allie’s nervous expression. He reached for her hand, intertwined his fingers with hers, and gave her a soft squeeze. The disembodied voice spoke after a soft chime, and the lift doors opened.

_“Level 8, Atrium.”_

“You alright?” he whispered

She swallowed hard and nodded.

 “Let’s go, everyone,” Moody said gruffly “and remember— _constant vigilance!”_

A grand fountain sat in the center of the obsidian-tiled atrium; golden figures of a witch and wizard stood tall and proud, surrounded by a centaur, goblin and house elf looking up at them in an adoring fashion. An illuminated pool surrounded the statues, littered with an assortment of glinting galleons, sickles and knuts.

They made their way to a lift on the other side of the atrium, wands drawn and ready. They listened for any sort of commotion, but nothing could be heard on this level. Despite the intense quiet, the air was tense— thick with anticipation.

This lift looked ancient and rickety; Sirius feared they would break this fragile piece of equipment the moment they stepped inside.

“This is the only lift that leads down to the Department of Mysteries.” Kingsley explained.

Their descent was quick thankfully—the lift was indeed as rickety as it looked. The doors clanged opened, and the disembodied female voice spoke once more.

_“Level 9, Department of Mysteries.”_

The corridor was long and dark; the only light visible was at the end, seemingly miles away from where they stood.

“ _Lumos.”_ Kingsley whispered.

They followed Kingsley and his wand light, walking with soft footsteps until they reached the end of the corridor.  Two oil lamps mounted on the wall burned bright, illuminating a black door with a large brass knob located in the center.

“Stay focused, stay alert.” Moody ordered.

Kingsley opened the door, and they filed one by one into a circular room, surrounded by doors that were identical to the one they just came through. The room had an ominous presence, like standing at the edge of a precipice.

Some of the doors had large white X’s scratched onto the front; had the kids done this? Or did the Unspeakables that worked here have to mark the doors themselves so they wouldn’t get lost?

“Well, isn’t this place charming…” Sirius muttered.

One of the doors banged open, and chaos erupted. A Death Eater ran past, his head stuck in an hourglass. The man’s head shrunk from middle aged down to a baby, then grew again, then shrunk again. It was a grotesque sight, something Sirius didn’t care to watch, but couldn’t take his eyes off either.

He was so intrigued by the baby headed man that a curse nearly hit him, flying right past his head and singeing his hair. He whipped his head around; masked Death Eaters were swarming them. He shot hexes as quickly as he could, but they were outnumbered, and there was no sign of the kids. Had they already been defeated? Or were they behind another one of these doors?

He ducked and crawled over to one of the doors with a white X and turned the knob. Upon entering the room, he felt his feet leave the ground.

_“What the…”_

He was floating, _in space._ All around him was a vast sea of blackness, planets and dim stars. He started to rotate upside down, his body floated aimlessly without any gravity to hold him upright.

“Harry? HARRY!”

No one answered. He strained to find the outline of the door he had just come through. He kicked hard as he swam through the air, willing himself back to the door. His arms and legs were on fire by the time he grabbed ahold of the brass knob.

His feet hit the ground, and this time, he was alone in the eerie circular room. He heard commotion, but couldn’t tell which door it was coming from. He ran to the next door to his right; he rattled and shook the knob, but it would not open.

“HARRY?!”

He rammed his shoulder against the door a few times as he attempted to break though. He cursed himself as he rubbed his aching shoulder; he was stupid to think he could break down such a solid door with only his bodyweight.

He let out a strangled growl, kicked the door in frustration, and then moved to the next door. The doorknob was cold to the touch on this door, much like an ice cube. He turned the knob slowly, opened the door, and stepped inside another dark room. This time, his feet remained on the floor, his silhouette outlined vaguely in the dim blacklights of aquarium tanks littered about the room. For a moment, he thought these tanks to be home to jellyfish. Upon closer inspection however, he discovered the jellyfish were actually disembodied brains— _human_ brains.

_“What the fuck ...”_ he muttered, under his breath. “Harry? Harry?!”

Further into the room, he found others, but not Harry. Allie stood face to face with a blonde young man in Death Eater robes. Their wands were pointed at each other, but they stood still as statues.

“Allie?” Sirius asked

She didn’t move. In the dim glow of the brain tanks, he could see her wand trembling. He raised his own wand, and pointed it at the Death Eater.

_“Stupefy!”_

Oddly enough, it was Allie who flicked her wand to block his spell.

“Allie, what the—“

“Sirius,” She said softly, gesturing to the man in front of her “This is my brother, Flynn.”

Flynn Murphy wasn’t particularly tall, but stood at the same height as Allie. His jawline was sharper, reminding Sirius of Shannon’s facial features. He didn’t look much like Allie at all, except for his eyes. Even in the dim glow of the brain tanks, Sirius noticed his eyes were identical to hers.

“Your _brother_ is a Death Eater...”

He spoke this as a statement, not a question— slowly, as he was having a hard time processing this information. Sure, Allie had told him about Flynn’s differences, but it was still hard to believe that two people with the same upbringing could be so different.

Actually, it wasn’t hard to believe at all, when Regulus came to mind— two brothers, same upbringing, yet two very different paths in life.

He stepped behind Allie and wrapped an arm around her waist protectively. She leaned back into him, and Sirius could feel her trembling. He held her tighter, his wand now also pointing at Flynn.

“Sirius Black… I’ll tell you, Alliecat— _never_ would I have expected this,” he gestured between them, an arrogant smirk spreading across his face. “Or would’ve expected you to join the Order of the Phoenix. You were always so… _reserved_.”

 “You left home 5 years ago,” she said softly “I am a different now— you know nothing about me.”

“Oh, but I do know quite a bit about you. You went to Azkaban, for stealing because our pathetic mother couldn’t seem to get food onto the table. You nearly married the bartender you work with, until you _mysteriously—“_  he winked at Sirius.  “—called off the engagement a week before the wedding. I also know the Ministry has been watching you— hoping you’d lead them to _him_.”

“For someone who was so determined to leave the family, you seem to have a spent a lot of time keeping up.”

“At first it was curiosity, I’ll admit,” Flynn sighed “Once you made your way onto the patrol team that posted outside the Prophecy Hall, I started following you. I couldn’t believe it— my sister. I got curious when you would disappear into thin air on your walks home from work, I couldn’t help myself. From trips to Florean Fortescue’s, to a late night walk with an unknown dog,”

Sirius gripped Allie’s waist tighter as Flynn continued to speak.

“I’ll tell you, I certainly wasn’t expecting the dog to turn into Sirius Black and punch your fiancé in the face.”

“ _Ex_ -fiancé.” Sirius growled

“Once I told Lucius Malfoy what I had seen, he made sure an anonymous tip that Black was in London made its way into the right hands— we figured you’d blame the bartender for ratting you out, rather than assume someone had been following you.”

“How could you,” Allie scolded, just above a whisper. “How could you turn me into the Ministry? How could you join him? How could you leave our family?”

“This is the new order— you’re a pureblood; _we’re_ purebloods. We should be wizard royalty. We should’ve grown up like the Malfoys or the Lestranges; or the Blacks—” Flynn gestured to Sirius, who gritted his teen in annoyance. “—But instead, we grew up poor, and struggling.”

“So that’s what you want? Riches? Status? You were always vain, but I didn’t think you as so selfish.”

“And where has selflessness gotten you?!” Flynn snapped “You’re a 5th year drop out of Hogwarts, a waitress at the Leaky Cauldron, and spent 6 months in Azkaban— for _what?_ To put food on the table because Mum can’t do it herself? You gave up your life because Mum couldn’t get her shit together!”

“Their finances were bad even before Dad left,” Allie protested through clenched teeth “You remember how much they used to fight about bills.”

“And do you know why that is? Do you know why Dad was never able to get a promotion at work, and make the money he deserved?”

Allie furrowed her brow, shaking her head in confusion.

“Because rumor had it, he had a squib daughter. He was passed up time and time again, because he was cursed to have such a disgrace for a child.”

“Don’t you _dare_ ,” Allie’s voice cracked, her grip on her wand tightened “Squib or no, she is still your sister.”

“She is no sister of mine!” Flynn cried angrily “I would _never_ claim a filthy squib as family. That’s why Dad left; he couldn’t stand what she was, either.”

“That’s not true!”

“It is true, Allie! You were too busy brushing her hair, changing the twin’s diapers or bandaging Rory’s scraped knees to see it. Dad was on track to become Head of Vital Statistics at the Ministry, until word got out that his daughter wasn’t showing signs of magical ability. Mum had let it slip to a ‘friend’, and before you know it, Dad was demoted to record keeper, and never offered up for a promotion again.”

“How do you know all this?” Sirius barked up “If this is news to Allie, how do you know it? You were a boy when he left.”

“I found Dad after I left home, and he and I joined together. Under the Dark Lord, we purebloods will finally get what we deserve.”

“He’s here?” Allie’s voice was just barely over a whisper. “Dad is here?”

“No, he’s attending to… _other_ business, at the time being.”

Allie opened her mouth to speak, but Sirius interjected, unable to control his temper.

“And what do you think Voldemort would say if he knew your sister was a squib, eh? Think he’d still be willing to have you in his ranks?”

“You dare speak his name,” Flynn said, raising a brow “Think that makes you brave, Black? To say the Dark Lord’s name?”

Sirius shrugged  “It’s just a name.”

“It’s more than a name.” Flynn’s green eyes twinkled as he smirked. “Well, he does know about my family situation, and yet—“he gestured to himself “–here I stand,” He looked Allie directly in the eye. “You can join us Allie, the Dark Lord is merciful. Beg for his forgiveness, and he will take you under his wing.”

“ _Never_ ,” she whispered “I would never join him.”

Flynn sighed. “Suit yourself— _flipendo!”_

Allie and Sirius flew backwards as Flynn darted for the exit. Sirius broke Allie’s fall, skidding backwards and knocking into one of the brain tanks and shattering it. A brain fell onto his shoulder and latched on like a leech. Tentacles sprouted from the brain stem, ribboning up his arm and up around his neck. They wrapped around and around, growing tighter, crushing his windpipe— the brain was going to suffocate him.

_“Sirius!”_ Allie cried “Hold on— _Relashio!”_

The brain released him and flew off, smacking the wall with a soft thud. Allie stumbled to her feet and extended a hand. Sirius stood, rubbing his neck and taking in sharp, deep breaths.

“You alright?” she asked softly

“yeah—are you?” he panted “Your brother…”

“There’s no time to not be,” she whispered “come on.”

They darted towards the door, throwing it open and finding themselves alone inside the circular room. They joined hands and went to the next door. Behind this door was an amphitheater, encircled with large stone benches that descended two stories down. A strange archway stood erect in the middle atop the dais. A singular black curtain swayed gently in the middle of the archway; something about it gave Sirius the chills.

There wasn’t much time to dwell on the mysterious archway however, as they had walked straight into unequivocal chaos. Spells flew in every which direction as the Order of the Phoenix dueled Death Eaters. Sirius joined in instinctively; he released Allie’s hand and leapt down the benches to the dais where Harry stood. Neville Longbottom lay on his back, his legs flailing every which way like a beetle overturned. He saw Antonin Dolohov raise his wand and making a slashing-type movement at Harry. He blocked the spell, but was knocked backwards and overtop of Neville’s thrashing legs. The glowing orb, the prophecy, was still in his hand, unbroken.

Dolohov raised his wand again. “Accio proph—“

Sirius lunged at him, ramming his shoulder and knocking him off balance. Dolohov stumbled to regain his balance; once he found his footing, he sent jets of red, green and orange towards Sirius.

“Petrificus Totalus!” Harry shouted.

Dolohov’s arms and legs snapped together, and he tumbled face first onto the cement floor. Sirius turned and grinned at Harry, now standing.

“Nice one!” Sirius cried as he grabbed Harry’s head and forced him to duck; avoiding two jets of green light that now zoomed over their heads. “Get out of here, take Neville and go!”

They looked up; Tonks was tumbling down the benches, her limp body smacking every step. Bellatrix laughed and jeered, a look of triumph plastered over her gaunt face. She made her way over to Allie, who was elbow deep in a duel with Rookwood.

“Allie!”

Sirius sprinted towards her, dodging Remus and Flynn’s duel that stepped into his path. He jumped in front of Allie, blocking a stunning charm Bellatrix had sent at her back.

“Nice try, Bella!” he hollered, shooting a stun back. “But you’ve got to be quicker than that!”

Sirius wasn’t sure if he’d ever dueled at this fervor and speed before. Bellatrix closed in on him, pushing their duel back and up onto the dais.  “Dumbledore! Dumbledore is here!” he heard someone shout, but now was not the time to look around and investigate. He had to keep his focus; he was a skilled dueler, but so was Bellatrix.

They fought like an intricate dance, a ballet of combat. Their duel was on display atop the dais like an opera, Death Eaters and the Order of the Phoenix as the audience. Bellatrix sent a jet of red straight for him; he ducked, dodging it just by an inch.

“Oh, come on!” Sirius jeered, rousing his cousin in hopes to break her focus “You’ve got to do better than that!”

He wasn’t expecting another spell so quickly. He felt his entire body go numb the moment the hex hit him square in the chest. He was stunned, unable to move or control his balance. He started to sway, his back arching as he fell towards the mysterious archway with the ominous fluttering curtain. As he grew closer, he felt an odd tranquility surge through his body as the volume of the scene around him was muted. He swore he could her James whispering to him, beckoning him. _Sirius… Sirius…_

_“Sirius!”_

Allie’s blood curdling scream snapped his attention back. He felt her grab the back hem of his shirt and yank him away from the arch with tremendous force. Sirius tried to steady himself, but thanks to Bellatrix’s stunning spell, he landed face first onto the concrete floor. He felt his nose crunch at impact; blood gushed down his face, pooling underneath him as he struggled to fight off the stun.

It took him a moment to be able to push himself up; he was dizzy from the loss of blood, but he didn’t feel pain in his face like he expected he would. Adrenaline, he figured.

Allie and Bellatrix were dueling on the dais now; Sirius wasn’t sure if he had ever seen her look so angry. Her expression was fire; her jaw was clenched so tight a small vein in her temple popped out.

“Aw, what’s wrong, Murphy?” Bellatrix laughed “Mad I almost killed your precious boyfriend? Still whine about him in your sleep, do you?”

Allie’s face turned bright red, but she did not slow her dueling speed. A jet of green burst from Bellatrix’s wand; Allie ducked just in time, but was caught off guard by Bellatrix’s next spell.

_“Crucio!”_

Allie screamed as she dropped to her knees, writhing and convulsing.  Bellatrix held her under the mercy of her wand, cackling with pleasure as she watched her suffer. Anger surged through Sirius as he forced himself to stand. He wiped the blood from his face with his sleeve, and then charged at her.

“ _You psychotic bitch!_ ”

He seized Bellatrix by the waist and knocked her onto her back. He pinned her to the ground and shoved his wand into her neck, bearing and gritting his teeth as he contemplated what to do with her. He knew what spell he wanted to use— it would be so easy.

_One incantation. That’s all it’ll take._

“Sirius, no!” Harry called.

Bellatrix looked at him with curiosity and amusement, laughing in his face at his rage. This made him angrier. He pushed his wand into her neck deeper; any harder, and he would puncture her windpipe.

“You have to mean it, Sirius,” Bellatrix taunted “You have to _want_ to kill me,” She smiled a sick, maniacal smile, showcasing her yellow teeth. “Go on, do it; prove you are a real man.”

_“Sirius!”_ Harry called again, more urgently.

He knew the spell, so why couldn’t he do it? Why was he hesitating? The world surely would be a better place without Bellatrix Lestrange.

His hesitation was a mistake. Bellatrix wiggled her wand into the perfect position and pressed it into his ribs. She spoke an incantation he’d never heard before, and was blown back off of her. He smacked the ground hard and skidded back a few feet into Allie. He tried to stand, but couldn’t. Dizziness set in, and he felt his clothes sticking to him as warm liquid poured from his side. He touched the wound, and then held his hand up to his face— he was bleeding profusely.

 “SIRIUS!” Allie squeaked

“No!” Harry cried

Out of his blurred vision, he saw Harry run after Bellatrix, with Dumbledore close on his heels. Death Eaters were scattered about the chamber, squirming and writhing in binds of black rope. Moody was trying to revive Tonks, as Remus stood over her with a pallid expression.

“Allie, hold pressure on his side— he’s losing a lot of blood.”

Kingsley appeared at his left side as Allie’s shaking hands pressed on his wound at his right. Her face was pale, expression terrified. She had a cut above her right eyebrow, trickling blood down her temple and cheek.

“Sirius?”

He was dizzy, weak; the lights overhead grew dimmer as Allie voice grew fainter. She sounded as if he were underwater— distant, and muffled.

_Sirius…_

That voice was clear. It was James’s voice once again calling to him, beckoning him. He turned his head to look past Kingsley, towards the archway with the ominous fluttering curtain.

_Sirius…_

The arch called to him— his friend called to him. It was an odd sensation, Allie’s voice next to him muffled and distant, when James’s beckoning from the archway was clear in his ear. His eyelids felt heavy, maybe he would close them— just for a moment. They were so heavy, he was so tired. He just needed to rest.

“Sirius? Sirius?! No, no, no— stay with me, alright? Stay with me!—“

The visions around him faded to black, the sounds grew quiet— the last thing he heard was Allie’s soft, pleading whisper in his ear, right before everything faded away.

“ _Sirius, stay with me— I love you.”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sirius may have survived the Veil, but I've left him in a bad spot. Will he live? Will he die? We shall see in the next chapter mwahahahahahahahaaaaa.
> 
> (P.S. I love hearing your guys's thought, please drop me some comments and tell me what is going through your brains right now!!)


	17. 17

Sirius opened his eyes, and immediately shut them again. He shielded his face with his hand as he slowly opened his eyes again, this time cautiously— the fluorescent light overhead was brighter than the sun and nearly blinding. He blinked a plain room into view; the blankets on the bed, paint on the walls, and the armchair situated in the corner were all in the same beige color palette. Where the hell was he? 

He shifted to sit up, and a sharp pain shot through the right side of his abdomen. He groaned and grabbed his side; he felt thick bandages through a thin scrap of material that had replaced his clothing. Upon further inspection, he realized he was dressed in a hospital gown— he was in St. Mungo’s.

“Ah, Mr. Black— glad to see you are awake.”

A man stood in the doorway to his room, dressed in lime green robes— a healer, no doubt. He was a plump man, balding at the crown, and small eyes that reminded him of Peter’s. He held a roll of newspaper in one arm, and a clipboard in another.

“How did I get here?”

Sirius’s voice was deep and crackly; hoarse from being freshly woken up.

“You were transported here from the Ministry of Magic. You were in pretty rough shape when you got here last week.”

“Hold on— last _week?!”_

“Yes, yes— we’ve had you under some sleeping draughts to allow you to heal. That was a nasty spell that hit your side; it about did you in.”

Sirius instinctively felt his side again, running his hand over the bandage as the Healer continued to speak.

“We’ll have you out of here in a day or so, but you’ll be on a series of potions every twelve hours for the next week until that wound heals up. We were able to repair your broken nose quite well at least—it should be good as new.”

He reached up and felt his nose; it felt as though it had never been broken in the first place. He looked around at St. Mungo’s overly beige room, feeling a great deal of unease. If he were at St. Mungo’s, then he was out in the open. Surely the dementors would be coming to arrest him any moment— why hadn’t they already?

“Why aren’t I in Azkaban’s hospital wing?”

The healer chuckled “Because you’re not a prisoner.”

“I’m the most wanted man in Great Britain,” Sirius said, blinking “They’ll be coming for me.”

“No, they won’t,” The healer smiled “Your name has been cleared.”

He set the newspaper roll down on the tray table next to him. He spread out the latest issue of the Daily Prophet to show him.

**SIRIUS BLACK: INNOCENT!**

The front page featured his portrait, smiling wryly as he flipped his hair out of his face. It was an old photograph— he had been only 19 or 20 when it was taken.

“My name has been cleared?” He asked thickly, running his index finger over the bold word _innocent._

“Yes sir, quite a few people— even Albus Dumbledore— corroborated your story. The public is outraged you didn’t receive a fair trial those years ago.”

“Likewise,” Sirius muttered under his breath. He stared at the front page, worried if he looked away for too long it would change. “Can I keep this? The paper?”

He read the headline over and over in his head. _Sirius Black: Innocent. Sirius Black: Innocent._

“It’s all yours. Now, you have some people waiting here that would like to see you, would you like me to send them in?”

_Sirius Black: Innocent. Sirius Black: Innocent. Sirius Black: Innocent._

“Mr. Black?”

Sirius’s attention snapped back to the healer. “Oh, yes— please, send them in.”

He nodded, gave him a polite smile, and exited. Sirius turned his attention back to the Daily Prophet; this had to be a dream, this couldn’t be real.

_Sirius Black: Innocent._

He scanned the article, his heart nearly leaping out of his chest as he read.

_Recent evidence has come to light that notorious mass-murderer, Sirius Black, is indeed innocent of the accused crimes. Black, who was serving a life sentence for murdering 12 muggles and wizard Peter Pettigrew, was framed by Pettigrew himself before he faked his own death._

_“It turns out that Peter Pettigrew is a Death Eater, not Sirius Black,” Albus Dumbledore explains “For many years we had it wrong. Pettigrew is indeed alive— he sliced off his own finger in order to frame Black for the murders. He had been a spy for [He Who Must Not Be Named] right under everyone’s noses. Had Black been granted a proper trial, this evidence may have come to light.”_

_Sentenced in late 1981, Black was not given a fair trial. Minister for Magic Cornelius Fudge declined comment on this, as well as any comment regarding the return of He Who Must Not Be Named. The Minister is expected to resign from his post at the end of the week._

“So he’s finally come to his senses…” Sirius muttered to himself, under his breath.

_Black was apprehended at the Ministry of Magic last Friday evening, injured during a brawl between the Order of the Phoenix, 6 Hogwarts students, Death Eaters and He Who Must Not Be Named. He was transported to St. Mungo’s Hospital for Magical Maladies and Injuries, where Healers informed the Daily Prophet that Black is expected to make a full recovery._

_Black is exonerated of his crimes accused from Halloween night 1981; however, there is no word yet if Black will face repercussions for his 1993 escape from Azkaban prison._

Sirius slammed the newspaper back down. “How about time served?” he grumbled “12 years was punishment enough...”

Still— he was found innocent. He was no longer a prisoner. He could go to the grocery, he could go to Diagon Alley— hell, he could simply take a walk around the block without fear of being arrested. He was _free._

It wasn’t long before his room was filled with visitors. Molly was the first to enter, swiftly running to his side and kissing his cheek enthusiastically.

“Oh Sirius, we are so thankful you are alright!” she cried “You’ve had a revolving door of visitors over the last week or so, and both the Prophet and Witch Weekly have been hounding the hospital for an exposé on you the moment you woke up.”

"How’s your gash healing up?” Arthur interjected “you feeling alright? Harry wanted us to owl the moment you woke.”

“I guess so— he’s not here?”

“No, we told him we’d bring him by the house to see you once you were home. Too much press around the hospital— he doesn’t need that right now.”

Sirius nodded, albeit just a little disappointed Harry was not here to greet him. He looked around at Remus, Arthur, Molly, Kingsley; there was someone else he was disappointed not to see.

“Where’s Allie?”

"She's with a Healer currently, but she’ll be along.” Molly said, smiling slightly.

Sirius frowned. “Healer? Why? Was she injured? Is she alright?”

Molly patted his shoulder reassuringly.

"She’s fine, Sirius, she’s just fine— she'll be along. We sent a medi-witch to inform her you had woken up."

Sirius relaxed back against his pillow. “So, the cat’s out of the bag on Voldemort. Fudge is to resign?”

“Yes, he’s gotten quite a bit of pressure from the community to step down. There are concerns with government security,” Kingsley explained “The community wondering how an alleged murderer could walk into the Ministry without any sort of alarms going off— the only reason Fudge and the Aurors showed up is because Dumbledore sent word.”

Sirius chuckled softly; it had seemed a little too easy for him to enter the Ministry— Fudge probably never expected him to walk right into the belly of the beast. Looking back, he was surprised he had the stones to do it himself. Unbridled Gryffindor bravery, he figured— to a fault, almost.

"How are the others?" he asked "Tonks? Mad-Eye?"

"Tonks is in the next room over,” Molly said “she had some spell damage, but she’s doing much better and should be able to go home in a few days."

"Mad-eye was also admitted, but he checked himself out after 24 hours," Arthur said "He was paranoid his potions had been tampered with. He refused to take anything the healers brought him."

Sirius laughed; Moody was always paranoid. Wouldn’t drink anything he hadn’t brewed himself. Remus stepped forward, smiling slightly.

"You know, for a minute we thought we'd lost you," he said "Allie was a wreck."

"Oh, the poor thing cried for two days straight— slept sitting up with her forehead resting against your bed,” Molly sighed  “She refused to leave your side until the Healers thought you were through the worst of it. Whatever spell Bellatrix hit you with was a nasty one."

"A nasty spell for a nasty bitch," Sirius muttered "Where's Harry staying? The Burrow? Of course he’s welcome to his room at my house even before he gets home."

"Actually,” Molly said “Harry is at his Aunt and Uncle's currently--"

"He’s with those loons?" Sirius cried "He should be at my house! He’s going to live with me from now on, of course."

"Sirius—" Remus cleared his throat "Dumbledore was very clear that Harry was to go back to his Aunt and Uncle's. He insis—"

"He’s my godson!” Sirius growled “I’ll have words with Dumbledore— leaving him with the Dursley’s yet again, pfft…”

"He’s going to be stopping by to see you here soon, actually," Arthur said "now that you are awake."

Sirius crossed his arms and let out a pouty huff. "Good."

He turned his nose up as he watched Arthur cast a patronus, assumingly to send word to Dumbledore. Molly had opened her mouth to speak again, but a knock came at the door and Allie stepped into the room. Sirius’s irritation faded almost instantly as a wide grin spread across his face.

"There she is!"

She flushed, giving everyone a sheepish smile before shuffling over to Sirius's side. She sat at the edge of his bed.

"How are you feeling?" she asked softly.

"Oh, I'm alright," he said "Don't you worry about me, kitten."

Molly looked at them with an odd smile. “Everyone, why don't we give these two some privacy, eh? Let’s all go check on Tonks."

Sirius and Allie watched as the Order members shuffled out of the room. Once they were alone, Allie flushed again.

"How are you doing?" Sirius asked "With everything— about your Dad and brother?"

She shrugged, starting to pick at a loose thread on the blanket. "Alright, I guess."

He watched her for a moment as she continued to fidget with the thread. She was dressed simply in a pair of faded jeans and one of his old band t-shirts, but she looked radiant and as beautiful as ever— even her unruly curls seemed to behaving more so than typical.

"Molly said you were with Healer?"

Allie flushed, nodding.

"Are you alright?" he asked "Were you hurt?"

She shook her head. “I— I need to— to tell you something…”

Sirius furrowed his brow “what’s that?”

She opened her mouth, but another knock at the door interrupted them. Dumbledore stood in the doorway, dressed in shimmering silver robes that contrasted against the dinginess of St. Mungo's.

"My apologies, didn’t mean to interrupt," he said "May I have a word with you, Sirius?

Allie stood to leave, but Dumbledore held his hand up to stop her.

"No Allison, you may stay. What I have to speak to Sirius about concerns you, as well."

She nodded, then sat back onto the edge of the hospital bed and took Sirius’s hand in hers, this time facing Dumbledore.

“Kreacher’s loyalties have been compromised,” Dumbledore started “He has been visiting Bellatrix Lestrange and Narcissa Malfoy—“

“What?” Sirius sat up abruptly, regretting his swift movements as he grabbed his side. “Why on earth would he be visiting them?!”

“Apparently you had ordered him ‘Out’ some time ago— you probably meant for him to leave the room, but he took it as ‘out of the house’, and went to the next Black relative he knew of. When Harry had attempted to contact you via the Floo network, after he had a vision of you being tortured, Kreacher informed him that you were not home. He was instructed to lie to Harry to get him to go to the Ministry, thinking he needed to save you.”

“That vile little _beast!”_ Sirius hissed “I swear, he’s getting clothes the moment I get home—“

“I would strongly advise you not to do that,” Dumbledore interrupted quickly “Kreacher knows far too much— thankfully he was ordered not to speak of some of the things he’d overheard during our meetings, so we can hope that the other side doesn’t know too much.”

“Well, I don’t want that— that _thing_ in my house!”

“Sirius, he’s mental,” Allie said softly “Maybe if you’d treated him a little better he—“

“Treated the little rat better?” he scoffed “treated him _better?!_ After all the prejudice slurs he throws around about my friends? He’s a carbon copy of my mother!”

“Might I suggest,” Dumbledore interjected, not unkindly “Sending him to work in the kitchens at Hogwarts? Close watch would be kept on him there.”

Sirius let out a huff, and then nodded stiffly. “Yes, fine— anything to get him out of my house.” He grumbled impatiently.

"Now, I’m sure the others have told you that Harry is with his Aunt and Uncle?"

"Yeah, and I’m not sure _why_ you insist on sending him back there. I'm his godfather, I’m more family to him than those prats are; he should be with me—" He took Allie's hand "—with _us_."

"The night James and Lily were killed, Lily sacrificed herself for Harry;" Dumbledore explained "Because of that sacrifice, Harry was protected from the killing curse. In order to keep him safe until he became of age, I needed to seal that protection with blood magic. Someone who shared the same blood that ran thought Lily's veins would need to care for him. That would be his Aunt. So long as he returns 'home'— meaning to the Dursley's— once a year, even just for a short time, the magical bond is still intact until his 17th birthday."

Sirius took a moment to chew on this thought. He had known that Dumbledore had some sort of a protection placed on Harry through things mentioned at meetings, but now it made sense as to why he was always so insisted on Harry returning to that house.

“Would it be harmful for him to spend weekends this summer with me?” he asked, after a moment.

"I do not think that be of any harm," Dumbledore said “and I’m sure he would enjoy staying weekends with you.”

"I'll write him, then," Sirius said, waving his hand "but I don’t think he’ll be thrilled about only staying on the weekends."

"I will explain to him why," Dumbledore sighed “It is time for him to know some other information I’ve been withholding from him thus far.” He turned his attention Allie, his eyes now twinkling "Allison, I’d like to discuss something with you as well."

Allie shifted to sit up straighter, looking at Dumbledore inquisitively.

"The Healers tell me that you show natural talent in caring for Sirius whilst he was asleep," Dumbledore said “I know this had been your ambition before you left school. Unfortunately, to be a Healer you need NEWT scores in Transfiguration, Potions, Charms, Defense Against the Dark Arts and Herbology. I regret that you never got a chance to take these exams, and would like you offer you the chance to at the end of next school year."

Allie’s eyes lit up, growing to the size of saucers. "Really?"

"You would be able to floo or use a portkey to attend lessons, but you would have to put in quite a bit of time to fit 2 years’ worth of classes into one school year."

"I'll do it," she said quickly "Yes— I’ll do whatever it takes."

"Very well," Dumbledore said "I'll see to it that you are registered for classes. Expect an owl middle of August with your supply list."

"Thank you, Sir, thank you." She said eagerly, smiling ear to ear.

Dumbledore nodded "I won't impose on you two any longer. I'll leave you for now, but I will be in touch."

Sirius nodded, and they watched Dumbledore leave the hospital room.

"Taking your NEWTS, that are exciting stuff," Sirius grinned "You're going to do great— I have full faith."

"I'm going to have a lot going on this year…" Allie’s expression fell. She paused for a moment, chewing on her lip.

“Yes, it’ll be busy, but you know Remus and I will help you as much as we can—now, what is it you wanted to tell me a few minutes ago?”

“I—“

Her breath caught in her throat. Her face flushed scarlet as tears welled up in her eyes. Sirius frowned as he studied her.

“Allie, what is it?”

She opened her mouth but no sound came out. She began to tremble, and a few tears slipped down her cheeks. Sirius cupped her face with his hands, wiping her tears with his thumbs and giving her an encouraging smile.

“Whatever it is, you can tell me.” he said softly.

She nodded then looked down at her lap. “I— I’m— pregnant.”

She spoke so softly that Sirius wasn’t sure he heard her correctly. He leaned forward slightly, furrowing his brow. “Say that again?”

“I’m pregnant.” She whispered again.

This time, he knew he heard her correctly. His heart skipped a beat, his stomach flip flopped. The room grew hot— was it just him, or did they kick the heat on full blast?

“You’re— no… no— surely you’re not really…?”

She nodded; tears flowed down her face freely now.

“How? We always used a contraceptive—“

“Not every time,” she whispered “That night Tonks came over, and we had a fair bit to drink; we forgot. I counted the weeks, it adds up.”

Sirius took a moment to wrap his head around this thought. That night was a little hazy, but he certainly didn’t remember either of them casting a contraceptive.

“…You’re pregnant,” He said, mostly to himself “that means I’m going to be a—”

He trailed off, his mind swirling. She bit her lip and nodded silently. She looked fearful, as if she was expecting him to be upset over this news. Instead, a wide grin spread across his face. She was pregnant _._ He was going to be father— a _Dad._

“I’m going to be a dad,” he said thickly, smiling a toothy grin “We’re going to be a family.”

 “You’re not upset?” she sniffled.

“Absolutely not,” Sirius said reassuringly. “This is everything I’ve ever wished for, kitten. My name is cleared— I’m a free man, and we can be a proper family.”

He wiped her tears with his thumbs once more, and then kissed her firmly.

“Is that where you were? Getting the baby looked at?”

“Yes,” she said “All seems well, they told me.”

“Excellent,” Sirius grinned. He reached for her stomach, placing his hand just above her navel “When will we feel kicks?”

“Not for some months,” Allie giggled “I’ll grow fat first before you’ll be able to feel anything.”

He didn’t think he could smile any wider— the mental picture of Allie with a large baby bump made him happier than he could ever describe.

“Who knows?”

“Just the Order so far— only because I broke down crying to Molly when I thought you weren’t going to make it.”

His smile faded almost instantly; he felt guilty for causing her to worry. “I’m sorry you had to go through that.”

“S’alright.” she sniffed.

They paused for a moment, simply staring and smiling at each other silently. “Come here—” Sirius shifted to one side carefully, and then patted the bed next to him. “Why don’t you lay with me?”

She curled up on his uninjured side, resting her head against his chest. She draped her arm over him, taking care not to touch his bandages. He kissed her forehead, and then rested his cheek against her head.

“I guess I should probably get a job, huh?” he muttered playfully. “Especially if you are cutting your hours back at work…”

“I never said anything about cutting my hours…”

“Ah, ah—“ he cut her off “I want school to be your first priority. Cut your hours back to the minimum; let me take that burden from you.”

“But my family—“

“Let me take that burden from you, kitten,” He repeated “I will make sure your family is taken care of, understand? You’ve spent your life caring for others— let me take care of you.”

She seemed to want to protest this, but after a moment she let out the breath she was holding and nodded. “Alright.”

Sirius kissed the top of her head once more. “Alright.”

The lay there, she in his arms, as Sirius’s mind raced around all he had learned in the last forty five minutes. He was a free man— his name was cleared. He wasn’t a wanted fugitive anymore; he could leave the house whenever he pleased. He was going to become a father, have a family of his own— he never thought he would have this. In a period of what felt like no time at all, he had gotten everything he’d wished for; everything he’d dreamed of night after night for the last 14 years.

“I love you.” She murmured against his chest.

“I love you too, Allie.”

And that he did, with every fiber of his being. Despite all his poor luck in his life, he felt so much fortune in this moment. He, Allie, Harry, the baby— they would be a proper family, the four of them.

As it should be.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Of course I wasn't going to kill Sirius LOL- this isn't Game of Thrones. He's my main character, I need him.
> 
> THANK YOU A MILLION for reading Be Careful What You Wish For- I am so appreciative for everyone who reads, as well as those who took the time to give me feedback. We writers are needy creatures, and hearing your feedback makes my soul happy.
> 
> Sirius and Allie may be on cloud nine currently, but Voldy is still up to his tricks- that's why ya girl's got another sequel coming! The next installment should be up soon; I have it outlined and have started plunking out the first few chapters :)


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